Chapter 1: Hehe! You gotta read the chapter first! Introduction!
Warning! Stupidity Inbound •••
Hello! Ah, sorry, shouldn't I introduce myself first? I'm really new to this 'first person' perspective type writing, eheh...
My name is #&÷£₩! Nice to meat you! Ahaha, get it? Meat? Well, I thought it was funny, you know? To lighten up the atmosphere a bit. You seem kind of bored, reader. I mean, I would also be bored if I was surfing novels all day. You know, laying down and scrolling through written works?
Yeah, I know that feeling too. Actually, wanna hear a story about it? When I was very, very young, I used to go the the school library. Yeah! My school had a library! Isn't that cool? Anyway, I picked up a book. It was called 'Harry Potter'. You know, that nichè work by J.K Rowling? Haha, nobody knows about that novel, trust me.
So, because I was bored, I actually picked up the novel and I started reading it. Truth be told, I wasn't very proficient in reading at the time because I was young, but I enjoyed it nonetheless! I really liked the part where Harry Potter got into the wall in the train station. Actually, I tried running into the walls of the train station when I came with my mother and my nose bled.
I remember my mother telling me the story of how I suddenly ran into the wall of the metro station and came back crying! Keke, it must've been so funny back then. Maybe not for my mother, but for the passersby!
Oh, sorry about that! Oh Gosh, I just went into another tangent again! My fault... I haven't asked your name yet! I'll try again, then.
Hi, my name's £&*¥#! What's your name..?
『Comment Your Name.』
Oh, that's a really nice name you have, reader! Well, truth be told, I can't actually see your name. Sorry! I know it's rude to not know a person's name but I can't help it! I can't look into the future and predict your name, Alex.
Actually though! Imagine if a person reading this was actually called Alex. That would be insane! The probability must be in the 100s! No, in the 100s! Oh, I'm getting really excited thinking about that person's reaction when they read their name! How creepy must it be for a random stranger on the internet to know your name, Gabriel?
Haha, got you again! Alex and Gabriel, are you shocked at all? Hehe, you must be pale from the shock at this point!
Seriously though, if your name is Alex or Gabriel, don't forget to comment! I'd love to see your reactions, even if I can't see them in real-time. Besides, won't it get rid of some boredom if you chat? To get your mind off of that loneliness in your head.
Ah! Don't get me wrong! I'm not calling you lonely or anything! It's just that... usually, people who read works like this have a more... introverted side, that's all. I haven't seen a single Wattpad enjoyer who's very, very, social. Well, you could correct me if I'm wrong but I'm still right on this one.
If it helps your ego, most people who read novels are actually more smarter than people who don't! It's true! If you read novels then you read very, very complicated words, and in turn, you learn that word! Right now, you're technically learning as we speak! Maybe you're not learning, learning, but you're still gaining knowledge!
Knowledge like uhm... knowledge that people who read novels are smarter than people who don't! And uhm... that I ran into the metro wall when I was young and had a nosebleed! Oops!
It's not exactly vital knowledge that you're learning right now, but knowledge is the culmination of smarts you collect over time! Imagine knowledge as a library. It starts off empty, but you fill them with books and it suddenly becomes fuller and fuller as each year passes!
Not to brag, but my library is almost full. Keke, yours must be really empty.
Augh! I'm really cheeky today! Forget I said that! Aughhh I'm really sorry! I get that from my mother's side, so it's not my fault! Just forget what I wrote! Actually, forget everything I said! I'm atoning for my sin of insulting you! I'm so, so, sorry!
Will you please forgive me...?
Please? Please, please, please, please, pleaseeeee??
Hehe! I know you would forgive me this one time! You're so forgiving, Damien!
Kekeke! Imagine that someone actually fell for that again! Aughh I'm rolling in my bed imagining the reaction of Damien, Alex and Gabriel! Ahahhaa! Oh God! I wish I could see anyone's perspective and look at their reactions! Just comment on what your reaction is, alright? I wanna see it! I'll be really, really, sad if you don't, so do it, alright?!
Do you promise? Hey, can we do a virtual pinky promise? Right now I'm putting my pink up on the screen, and you should too! Come on! Just do it! Don't hesitate!
『Hold Your Pinky Finger Out.』
There! That's a promise, alright? If your name is Damien, Alex or Gabriel, comment on your reaction! No, better yet, just message me entirely! My Wattpad DM's are open for everyone to use! But hey! Don't even dare to send my naughty things! I'll be mad if you do... maybe not mad, but I'll be angry if the things you send me are bad! Bad as in bad content.
No, that isn't what I'm talking about. I'll get mad if... the content you send is low-quality. Only high-quality... stuff in this household, alright?! I have very high standards, so don't dare give me bad sauce!
Ah! It's already 950 words! I should wrap this up now! So, did to enjoy my writing? Actually, no. You did enjoy my writing, right? Hey, hey. I put a lot of effort into this! So don't you dare to dislike it! Besides, you already read the chapter fully, so why hate it if you already read it? Gosh, I'm such a philosopher!
Ah! It's a 1000 words already! Alright, reader! Alright, Damien, Gabriel and Alex! Don't forget your promise to me and comment what was your reaction to the namedrop! Have a good day! My hands are hurting, augh...
Author Notes •••
Enjoy the character speaking to you directly? 'Vote' for the chapter if you liked it! Also, voice any concerns in the comment section! I'd be happy to read and adapt my works to them!
Happy reading!
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