Chapter 105: 104
Returning to his room, Ainz considered the need to set up barricades to prevent visitors from entering his room. Just in case of course.
Hmm… if he moves the bed to the door and then puts the table and bedding upside down, then the door will be almost impossible for a normal person to open. But on the other hand, if the intruder were Servants - and Ainz was talking about the Servants right now - then such a trifle will not become an obstacle for them at all.
Or maybe he should use his spells to create a barricade that not even Asterios could break?
No… some of his more 'excitable' Servants, at least as far as Ainz could have guessed right now, a girl, will break through the wall next to the door if the door would not budge for them. If that were to happen, then Ainz will have to repair the wall. So the plan to barricade the door will have to be scrapped.
Therefore, with his plan to block the door unavailable, Ainz just shook his head and instead of setting up the barricades, simply closed the door and then locked it. With his privacy somewhat guaranteed, he slowly walked to his bed.
Near the bed, Ainz, letting the force of gravity act on him, fell face down into the pillow. In an instant any signs of life ceases.
Someone could say that Ainz was now dead inside, and that person would be right twice-fold. First, inside the body that Da Vinci had created was Ainz, an undead creature that was dead by definition. And secondly, Ainz felt that his mind at the moment was so dead that even his undead body was now more alive than his mind.
And so Ainz didn't want to think. About. Anything. At. All.
Girls, harems, relationships...
Ainz couldn't even bring himself to say any of these taboo things in his own mind.
"If I keep just lying on this bed, will they stop looking for me? Maybe if I just pretend to be dead, I won't have to solve any of these problems… "
Ainz wished he was just a bag of bones right now. A corpse that no one will touch and everyone will avoid. Just a corpse from which no miracles no decisions are expected from, and to which girls will not line up to kiss…
Although, if he suddenly discovers that one of the Servants has a tendency towards necrophilia, it will become another unpleasant surprise for Ainz. And considering how many unexpected discoveries he made about the Servants in the last hour and a half, Ainz was no longer completely sure that such an assumption was that crazy.
Ainz continued laying in his bed motionlessly, slowly feeling his mind sinking into an indescribable sense of emptiness.
Ainz was not asleep. Ainz, unfortunately or fortunately, was deprived of the possibility of sleep due to his undead body. But in a certain sense, what Ainz was doing right now could be called sleeping. It was sleeping in the sense that Ainz's mind was slowly losing any thoughts that might be of concern to him. His mind was remaining empty, allowing him to slowly calm down.
Ainz slowly closed his eyes...
A loud knock on the door a second later made him jump on the spot.
"Ainz!" Da Vinci's voice could not be confused with anyone else's.
Ainz held his breath, hoping that the terrible predator, the shark that took the form of a beautiful girl, smelling not blood, but Ainz himself, would pass by. Alas, Da Vinci's next words made Ainz groan internally. His safe haven was already breached. "I know that you are inside! I saw you walk into the room!"
Ainz silently cursed his luck.
Da Vinci, ha ha… Why her!?
Ainz could barely imagine how complicated things would be if she, too, confesses her love for him. Or, even if not for that, with how curious she is… Just imagine if she starts shaking him for answers to questions that he could not give? Ainz could already imagine the kind of questions she would ask in his head.
"What happened in the Singularity, how does your magic work, how did you manage to predict everything again with your ingenious and amazing plan, who are you planning to choose?"
Under normal circumstances, Ainz would not even mind talking to Da Vinci. Even with her over-inquisitive mind that would constantly ask questions that Ainz himself has no answer to give. Nevertheless, she was an interesting conversationalist and Ainz was already used to talking nonsense with a completely serious expression on his face, allowing the rest of the Servants to tell legends about his intelligence and abilities, but...
Not now. Oh, he couldn't deal with her right now...
Yes, in general, he did not want to interact with anyone right now and Da Vinci least of all. Ainz just wanted to dissolve in bed and lie still…
"I have the keys to all the doors in Chaldea!" Da Vinci's voice made Ainz groan and then shake his head in despair.
Well, in that case, there was only one thing left for him to do.
Casting Teleportation instantly made Ainz disappear from the room. If he had stayed a second more, he would hear Da Vinci grumbling a bit and giving up. Ainz would have heard Da Vinci walking away from his door, deciding that Ainz had disappeared somewhere.
Ainz encountered a problem when he was deciding where to escape to, he has no place he can easily hide in. He after all was not so familiar with the interior layout of Chaldea.
He knew the location of the private rooms of some of the Servants - to be more precise, those Servants that Ainz wanted to face the least. A library in which Ainz has a high chance of stumbling upon Medusa. Da Vinci's personal workshop, the place the person he just fled from was usually in. Hundreds of tangled corridors in which Ainz would definitely get lost and where it would be a miracle if he didn't run into someone else. Olga's office, which Ainz also did not want to visit right now.
And finally, the kitchen.
Emiya lived in the kitchen - or Archer, as he asked Ainz to call him with, which means that under normal conditions Ainz had the least chance of bumping into any of the girls in the kitchen.
But he still needed to be careful. Therefore, once in the kitchen, Ainz instantly looked at his surroundings like a man haunted. His focused vision deftly captured his surroundings, and, not finding a single girl around, Ainz relaxed.
"Oh..." The unexpected voice came out of nowhere surprising Ainz, forcing him to turn around.
Indeed, Ainz's vision was amazingly focused on the female Servants if he could not notice Hector, who was standing two steps away from Ainz.
"Oops, it seems that you have caught me Master", - Hector smiled, after which Ainz noticed how Lancer slowly tried to stick his hand out of the fridge, - "I am... Um... was trying to cook my own dinner?"
"You should have asked Archer to cook something." Ainz was a bit suspicious of Hector's strange reaction. So Ainz then carefully looked at the hand in which Hector was holding something that he was trying to hide behind the fridge's door. "Is that… Beer?
"Yeah… ", - Hector looked like a kid who was caught with the cookie jar. - "Looking at Drake guzzling booze, I thought that there was no prohibition on alcohol here… So I decided to get some for myself… "
Ainz blinked.
Alcohol... Oh yes, right now he was not at all against alcohol!
"Grab me one", - Ainz, now looking forward to getting buzzed himself, looked at the door to the kitchen, - "Is the door locked?"
"Um, no?" Hector gave Ainz a slightly askant look, though he still grabbed another can of beer from the refrigerator.
Ainz, without exchanging any words, went to the door, then immediately locked it. With that done, shaking his head, he sat at one of the chairs in the kitchen.
Hector, carefully looking at the face of Ainz, who was focusing his gaze on the table, put the can of beer in front of him, - "Right out of the fridge."
"Thank you," Ainz replied calmly, after which he opened the can and immediately took a sip.
In general, Ainz practically do not drink any alcohol. Unless it is for a special occasion like his birthday, he would rather spend his money on Yggdrasil. Though when he did buy some it would be some kind of cheap beer substitute, in which the taste of alcohol was easily masked by the taste of cheap chemicals. But, right now, Ainz realized that alcohol was especially necessary for him. There's no way he could handle the situation he's in sober.
Hector, looking at Ainz practically draining the can of beer, sat down at the table opposite him. He then slowly opened his can and took a sip, after which, looking at the silent Ainz, started talking "Hard day?"
Ainz glanced at him and then took another sip, "You have no idea."
"Perhaps," Hector exhaled, then glanced at Ainz again, "Mind if I smoke?
Ainz nodded languidly at Hector's question. After a second, Hector flicked his lighter, grabbed some cheap cigarette, then began to smoke. Hector took a slow drag of his cigarette, then took a sip of beer from his can. The quintessential look of an overworked salaryman. - "Do you want to share about what happened?"
Ainz was silent.
'Want', ha... Who would care, whether he wants to or not...
On the one hand, Ainz was the last person to want to involve another person in the ups and downs of his personal life. The last time he did it, it ended up with Serenity confessing her love for him. The chaos in Ainz's mind from that interaction proc'ed his emotion's suppression to activate about forty or fifty times.
On the other hand, Ainz physically could not keep all this inside himself.
In general, Ainz was one of those people who know his limitations well. And therefore he could not hesitate to admit that this whole situation was for him... Too much.
Ainz sighed and then took another sip.
Although the beer Hector found in Chaldea was of fairly average quality and was probably used by some staff as a personal stash. Ainz, who rarely drank, felt that he was slowly starting to get drunk.
Although, it was worth saying that his body was immune to poisons of all kinds, this includes ethanol aka alcohol. His immunity of course would not give him the opportunity to get drunk in the first place. But the atmosphere he's in and the general madness of the situation worked, in this case, some real wonders.
"Oh, where do I start…" Ainz exhaled forlornly and looked up at the ceiling, as if hoping that someone would send him some kind of hint from the sky. But the ceiling was unmerciful in this case, so Ainz slowly started speaking, "Women."
"Ah", - Hector, as if he didn't need any more words, nodded understandingly and looked at the sky as well. Or the ceiling in this case - "Of course, all confusing and complex problems always begin with women…"
Ainz warbled in agreement and took another sip.
"So... you were rejected?" Hector took another drag, then took a sip while looking at Ainz.
"It would be better that way", - Ainz extracted the words like teeth, - "They confessed their love to me."
"Hoh, that was unexpected", - Hector immediately tried to correct himself, - "No, I don't mean that I don't think that women won't be attracted to you or something. I mean that usually people are in your state when they are rejected, and not when they are confessed to…"
"Oh, you don't know the worst part of it.", - Ainz sighed and drained the rest of the beer in one gulp, - "Pass another can."
"The second is on the way", - Hector put out his cigarette, took the last sip, and then quickly brought a couple of cans back, - "So... Who? Who had confessed to you?"
"Oh…" Ainz shrugged, "This is where the problems begin… Serenity, Medusa and Olga."
Hector blinked. "All three?"
"All three," Ainz nodded and dropped his head into his hands.
Hector silently took a sip from the new can and looked up, "So... You were agonizing who to choose between them?"
Ainz slowly looked up, then abruptly pulled the lid off the can of beer and drained it in several large gulps.
"Oh, apparently not," Hector stood up and then pulled out another can of beer for Ainz.
"They say that they didn't mind sharing. A harem in all but name.", - Ainz blurted out, - "Except for Olga... But I'm not even sure that even she would mind it."
"Hmm", - Hector raised one eyebrow in thought, - "This sounds like a dream for any man, so I see no reason to be so broken about it. The girls are ready for the harem!"
"I'm not ready for it," Ainz replied shortly, after which he opened the new can and took a sip.
"Hah…" - Hector shook his head, - "If you don't mind sharing then… The reason?"
Ainz looked at Hector like he had two heads. Hector immediately waved his hands in response, - "No, I understand you being troubled about it. Being propositioned by a girl is already something, nevermind three, but it seems like it still sounds perfect so far. You are surrounded by beautiful girls who know about each other liking you. Like, you can just sit and reap the benefits…"
Ainz exhaled and looked carefully at Hector.
Hector, unlike Ainz, did not possess any ability to prevent him from getting drunk. So after draining three cans of beer in rapid succession, his eyes were already very slightly more defocused than usual. Seeing the evidence of Hector's slight inebriation, it allowed Ainz to be more 'open' about his troubles.
"I... I have never been particularly good at communicating with... Girls," Ainz sighed again.
Hector blinked at the revelation, then suddenly laughed out loud.
Ainz frowned at him, however did not comment on it, allowing Hector to slowly recover his calm.
"Oh ha ha-ha, I'm sorry, it's just, ha-ha!" - Hector slowly wiped away the tears that appeared in his eyes with his sleeve, and then took another sip, - "I've heard enough of you here, ha-ha... Come on! Even though I have witnessed you doing something impossible, ha-ha... Just imagine, with you being so troubled with women, means that women are still the thing in front of which no intellect and strength can save you from, ha-ha... And I knew, I knew it!"
Ainz silently took another sip, and then exhaled slowly, "No amount of strength will help you learn to communicate with women."
"Yeah", - Hector slowly gathered his breath and shook his head, - "Absolutely…"
For a few seconds, the kitchen was plunged into silence again A silence which Hector interrupted with the sound of his lighter, knocking out a couple of sparks, setting fire to the Lancer's cigarette.
"So…" - Hector gasped, - "Did you also have problems with women in the past?"
"No, it's just…" - Ainz couldn't say for sure that he had problems with women... It's just that he didn't interact with women for a long time, other than with his guildmates of course. Though, he already doesn't think of them as women in the first place. What problems could there be with what you don't have? - "It just… It has been a long time since my last... Relationship"
Hector blinked in surprise.
Although Hector might have missed it from the amount of great and terrible things that his Master is, his Master is also a Magi. Hector thought about it some more, he guessed that it was logical for Ainz to be having problems interacting with women. Well, that is, great magis were usually associated with extreme seclusion, focused only with the search for the terrifying secrets of reality in the dusty manuscripts in the depths of their towers. In that case, Ainz, the great necromancer, would also really not have the most… Impressive list of victories on that front.
But even if this sounded very logical, it still continued to be strange, at least from Hector's point of view. Usually, when people see some great figure, then the people would also begin to idealize that warrior and believe that the great figure could not have any weak points. Especially such common ones as social awkwardness or difficulties in communicating with girls. Well, more precisely, usually a great magi could easily just take what he wanted - he did not need any permission. And is so filled with ego, that any other person is to be treated like mushrooms, kept in the dark and fed shit. It's a rarity, bordering on a miracle, to see a magi being particularly concerned with another person's opinion, barring other magis of course.
Of course, this is on the condition that this magi was not particularly burdened with any moral standards in the first place, but magi were rarely too moral people. Especially great ones, and especially masters of dark magic. After all, it was already in the title, 'dark' magic!
It was all the more strange to learn that Ainz, the great necromancer, the magi who mastered the darkest and most terrible magical direction was so... so...
Ordinary? Human?
That is, having problems communicating with girls was probably the most common of all the weaknesses that could be imagined. It would only be even weirder if Ainz was allergic to nuts or something.
"Master, do you happen to have any allergy?" Hector looked at Ainz like he was a rare specimen that would run away if they were surprised.
"No," Ainz shook his head and Hector exhaled. Great, otherwise he wouldn't be sure at all about what he could believe about the world.
Hector sighed, then shook his head and took a sip from the can. "So, then... Girls."
"Yeah, girls," Ainz exhaled and sipped beer.
Hector did not consider himself a smart person... Yes, in general, no one smart does. Hector was smart enough to not fall into the pitfalls of believing one was smarter than anyone.
Therefore, he was at a loss. Definitely, it's not that he couldn't offer Ainz any suitable suggestion right now. Especially if the problem was not with the girls, but with himself, and his... unwillingness to communicate with girls.
"Fuh… okay", - Hector shook his head and took another drag from his cigarette, - "In that case, hmm... What can I suggest?"
"If I would have known the answer to that - I would have done it already," Ainz sighed in response.
The kitchen plunged into a thoughtful silence, interrupted only by sips.
"Well, in that case…" Hector started talking again, - "If you can't attack it from the front, what remains is to go at it from the opposite direction. What would happen if you refused their advance?"
Ainz thought about it for a second and then answered, "They will be upset."
"And you?" Hector looked at Ainz askant.
Ainz thought for a second, going over it again and again, and then with a slow exhale of breath, answered, "I… I will be fine… in time. But… I'll be upset too."
"Why would you be upset?" Hector drank from the can again, seeing it empty, then went for another.
"Because… I don't want to upset them," Ainz also went for his can.
Hector returned a second later with two cans of beer in hand, handing one to Ainz, "Last one."
Ainz nodded gratefully, then drained the remains of the previous can and reached for the new one.
"Just this, that they will be upset?" Hector looked at Ainz carefully, "No more reasons than that?
Ainz thought about it, silent. It took a few sips of beer before he could somehow squeeze the answer out of himself, "Not only that, I also… I like them."
"So… if you do not want to upset them and at the same time like them." Hector thoughtfully pulled out another cigarette, - "Hmm... I'm not in any way skilled when it comes to relationships. But if you like them and they also like you, and it seems like they are satisfied with such a relationship, then... The main reason you are troubled is that you yourself do not want such a relationship?"
"It's not that I don't want it," Ainz breathed out, "It's just... It's just unusual and unexpected for me."
"So, in general, you are not against it.", - Hector slowly, measuredly, laid out his conclusion. "You just need a little time to think about all this?"
Ainz was quiet, thoughtful, "Well, actually, yes."
"Hmm," Hector puffed on thoughtfully, then took another sip. "In that case... How about just telling them you need time to think about it? Well, sort of like taking a time-out and thinking about exactly how it should be... How to organize such things?"
Ainz blinked and then exhaled, a bit of relief in his voice. "Well… that sounds not that bad."
"Okay", - Hector took a sip of beer, - "In that case... You can say that, I have fulfilled my mission here."
Ainz blinked and then took a sip of beer, "Well, probably yes."
"In that case, since the beer has run out…" - Hector exhaled and looked around, - "I don't see anything else to do in this kitchen, things to do to unwind a little…"
Ainz blinked and looked at Hector.
Hector smiled, - "There seems to be a console in the break room and there are a couple of good fighting games on it…"
Ainz blinked again and smiled, "You're speaking my language."
"How do you do it?!" - Hector shouted, throwing away the controller, while looking at the grinning Ainz, "Sixth victory in a row!"
"I have memorized your patterns," Ainz smiled. " When you jump, you always follow up with a fireball, and then start shooting at the ground. Then, depending on how well that works, you would follow it up with one of three options…"
"Terrifying, you have memorized my actions in a fighting game", - Hector shook his head, - "Look, I seem to have a Tactics skill, but even I would not have thought of using such a thing for this!"
"Well, in that case, you can say that I have surpassed you in this", - Ainz grinned, then shook his controller, - "Another game?"
"Maybe…" - Hector said with interest...
"Arthuria! Get away! It's just dough, it's not ready yet!" Archer's shout interrupted Ainz and Hector's occupation, making them look at the corridor door with interest.
"Don't you dare tell your king what she can and cannot touch!" Arthuria's voice was majestic, but due to the content of the conversation, it did not sound like it at all.
Hector and Ainz looked at each other, after which Hector sighed, - "Okay... Apparently, the rest period is over. The kids would have a lot of problems without the adults looking over them…"
"Hmm, yes," Ainz smiled back, looking at the back of the retreating Hector, then turned his gaze to the flickering game screen on the TV.
"PLAYER NUMBER ONE - WINNER!" - read the inscription.
Ainz stared at it for a few seconds and then smiled.
Is he a winner?
Ainz smiled, thinking of what Hector said. After which he remembered the Singularities that he had solved, the girls and what lay ahead and...
Ainz chuckled.
Yes, who knows how his life will turn in the future, but...
The path is rocky and full of troubling things. Even if it was only calm right now, he would persevere, he is Ainz Ooal Gown.
And Ainz Ooal Gown always comes out as the winner.
Name: Hector
Race: Human
Title: Defender of Troy
Occupation: Servant of Ainz Ooal Gown
Residence: Chaldea, Hector's room
Karma: +150 (Neutral Good ~ Good)
Racial Level: -
Class level: Lancer (15)
Defender (10)
The Last Warrior (5)
Others (16)
Total: 46 Class Levels = 46 Levels
HP: 60
Mana: 60
Physical Attack: 60
Physical Defense: 0
Agility: 80
Magic Attack: 0
Magic Defense: 60
Resistance: 60
Special Abilities: 60
Ability: Durindana
Level: 80
A particularly powerful ranged attack involving throwing a spear. Nearly all damage dealt is considered physical piercing damage, although a small amount of damage is still carried over as explosive fire damage. No more features - just an extremely strong physical attack.
Player comments:
- In a strange way… No, I'm certainly not saying this in defense of the build, anyone who does not increase physical defense is just an idiot, whatever you say! But still, if he has a class that allows it to exist for some time after death… Oh my God, I can't believe I'm saying this, but this build is partially… Working.
-Like, the best build I've ever seen from this coterie of madmans! This one can somehow work! Physical defense is zero, which is bad of course, but still...
- I don't know, maybe I'm saying this because of the heap of shitty builds that I have recently reviewed before. But this one is even... Not so bad... It works... Lord, what am I saying about a build without physical defense...
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone