Chapter 46: Ideals

Eliseline frowned.

"But save the world from what? Yes, there's the North to worry about, but after the last two times we've lost control over it, the countries are now more prudent. They won't make the same mistakes twice. Every country now has a duty to contribute to the Great Barrier and anyone who slacks off is punished severely by the rest. Even in war, there's always a group of mages reserved to maintain the barrier."

Savine shook her head.

"The North is dangerous, and I'm sad that I'm the one saying it to you, but even when the Great Barrier gets breached -which it will eventually happen, there's no doubt about that – it will not threaten humanity. The North is not what I'm saving you from."

"Then what?"

Savine thought for a few seconds. "Well, there are two main things. One is to keep you guys from obliterating yourselves."

"What? Why would we do that?"

"Funny how everyone says that, but oddly, 1 out of 30 worlds ends up dead with no humans left. All due to their own actions."

"…"

"Secondly, it's to keep the people's faith in God strong. If there are too few people that believe in something higher left in the world, God loses connection to the world and can't affect it in any way. When that happens, it's only a matter of time before the world is devoid of life."

"Why?"

"It's because God provides the energy that allows intelligent life to be formed inside a world. Without it, no life would form and in a world that loses that energy, the humans soon become extinct."

Eliseline frowned.

"Then aren't we soon to be extinct? There are temples here, but none know your God. We worship the deities of the elements and of time and space and of light and darkness. There are no mentions of a God that creates world and supplies life."

Savine shook her head.

"It's best to believe in the true God specifically, but it's good enough that the people believe in something holy. As long as there's a specific deity you think of when you're stranded on an island or something, it's good enough. God has no problem overlapping with those deities."

Eliseline looked unconvinced.

"Even if what I believe in is a devil who wants to slaughter all of humanity? Those can be considered deities as well."

"It doesn't matter. God isn't so fussy," Savine smiled. "God has created humanity, so of course God knows what emotions they feel and what horrors they're capable of committing. God only creates and witnesses. God doesn't judge you."

"…"

"You know how I preach responsibility, right?"

"Yes."

"I'll tell you a little secret," Savine said. "It wasn't God who taught me about preaching responsibility. It was something I decided on myself."

"?"

"As an angel, I only know two truths about God. That God creates and witnesses. Everything else, is a complete mystery. What God believes in, what God thinks is right or wrong, whether God even thinks about any of this as seriously as we do, I can't tell. I've never spoken to God, never seen God.

"But after becoming an angel, seeing what other angels do, joining them and saving the worlds, learning about what God does… I came to my own conclusion about all of it. Since God only creates and witnesses, without judging us, why can't we do the same?"

Savine felt her voice rise.

"We should be more accepting of ourselves. We shouldn't berate ourselves for being cowards, we shouldn't feel bad for lacking intellect and we shouldn't beat ourselves for being judgmental of others. The ugliness of humanity is still part of humanity. The sins we commit and think are still part of us."

"So we should just let go? Ignore everything and fulfill our most depraved wishes?" Eliseline asked.

Savine smiled. "Is what you want something so depraved and evil?"

"No…"

"Right? I'm sure you don't want to be running around the world, raping and slaughtering children like some of the people you're imagining right now."

"…"

"The desires of people are not so fucked up as you imagine. Mostly, they're innocent things. Love, material gains, fame, power, wisdom. It's just that life usually don't allow them to achieve them the proper way.

"But even so, I recommend you not to worry about the desires and wishes of others. Focus on what you want. Ponder about what you think about yourself. Dig deeper into your soul. And no matter what you find, don't judge yourself."

Savine sighed.

"The thing I'm preaching now, the thing I believe in, is but a simple ideal. It is my form of God. I believe in this because I want to and I preach it because I want to. I know that no one will be able to truly understand me, but I still want my philosophy to be known.

"I also know that no matter how I try, it would be impossible to make everyone else in the world think like me. I'm happy with converting only you to my side. I want you to live a life where you own your actions and ideals without worries. I hope you'll be able to achieve the things you want because I know you're not a psychopath whose greatest desire is to murder someone to vent your frustrations."

"..."

Looking at Eliseline sitting there quietly, pondering upon her words, Savine sighed helplessly.

"Sigh… It's funny. I've had half a millennium to think about all this, but still, I struggle to properly put it in words," Savine said. "Well, I can only hope you'll understand me, eventually. But deep down, I know our thoughts will end up different. And I accept that fear of mine."

Eliseline fell into silence.

Savine's head was filled with thoughts as well, though her heart ached somewhat. She knew. Her words were but ideals. Her envisioned world was nothing but an ideal as well. Even when she stood at the top of the world after saving it properly as an angel, hailed by all as the Savior of Humanity, loved and respected, she couldn't make the people implement her philosophy.

People were social animals. For most, their desires conflicted with society's norms. Because of that, none could wholeheartedly accept themselves and their flaws.

Eventually, she stopped bothering. No matter how hard she tried, her ideals were forgotten. No, they were never implemented in the first place. People were flawed beings in the first place. They were so completely biased towards themselves that it was impossible to make them feel objectively responsible.

Savine was no different.

A mood of melancholy grasped her. It's been a while since she thought about these things. What she did in the last three worlds... that was truly the easy way out.

She chuckled to herself.

'I thought I was past philosophy… but I suppose I'm still learning new things about myself.

She sighed and let the thoughts disperse. Outside, a young boy on horseback rode towards a flock of sheep. He circled behind them and rode between one end of the flock to the other. Scared by the horse, the flock changed directions and slowly trudged back home.

Finished, the boy galloped back home at top speed, adrenaline rushing through his face.