Chapter 1: - 1 -
"And what of my future? Will I ever know what happened to me?" I peered at my hands, examining the lines on them as if they told me my fate.
They did.
"Though patience be a tired mare, yet she will plod." The woman gave me a stern look, her brown eyes swirling with an emotion I couldn't quite put my finger on as my lips pressed together in a thin line at the quote.
"I hate Shakespeare." I muttered, rolling my eyes at my reflection who seemed to be amused at my muttering.
"I know. That's why I said it." She stated when I released a huff of frustration.
"Then why do you see me, if you cannot tell me a thing?" I inquired, peering at her through my lashes when she shrugged.
"You and I, we're the same. Always were, always will be. And as to why, that, I cannot say. It is for you to figure out." She said with a straight face and I knew she was right.
"My longing weeps for everything. My longing shoots back at me, to kill or be killed." I stated, looking at her identical brown eyes that seemed lighter as the sunlight fell on them, making the dark line through them much visible.
Half brown, half black, I thought.
"Darwaish. Always liked the guy. But he was a bit too poetic for my own good. Too… depressing." She said, scrunching her face up in discomfort when I gave her a sly smile.
"Oh? I thought we were the same?" I asked her, the corner of her lips tugging upwards.
"Yes, well, he was a good companion when times became… rough." She stated with slight hesitation as if telling me more would be a sin.
I guess it was.
I rest my chin on my hands as I propped my elbows on my dark brown mahogany dresser, watching her with nothing but curiosity.
"You intrigue me. I intrigue me. So much mystery, so many questions, oh, so much to ask." I sighed, momentarily closing my eyes before looking around my scantily decorated room.
Cream colored bare walls, just some patches of leftover yellow tape after we hung balloons for my sixteenth birthday, the one seat sofa chair pushed against the wall and my study desk crowded with the pile of books and papers littered all over.
Messy clothes were lying about, my woolen blanket scattered on my bed after I had wrapped it around my shoulders in the morning because I felt cold, not bothering to fold it afterwards.
My pillows were a mess and my bookshelf was the only thing that stood out in the room.
Neat, clean, so organized.
The only thing I actually put effort into.
"I would rather live in a world where my life is surrounded by mystery than live in a world so small that my mind could comprehend it." The woman's voice brought me back out of my thoughts as I looked at her, raising in eyebrow when she shrugged.
"Harry Emerson Fosdick. I remember writing it in my dairy when-"
"When mama forced you to go to school with her, yes, I remember." She gave me a small smile and I nodded, smiling faintly at the memory.
"Did you memorize everything in there? In the diary, I mean." I asked when she smiled again, a knowing look in her eye.
"You know the answer, then why ask?" She inquired skillfully when I shrugged.
"Just wanted to make sure, I guess." I mumbled, knowing she'd heard me and heard her small hum in response.
"What are you thinking?" The woman asked me when I shook my head.
"Just… nothing important, I guess. Random stuff, mostly." I answered, averting my gaze when I heard her sigh.
"It's him, isn't it?" She asked softly but I didn't answer, just stared at my lap like it was the most interesting thing around.
"I don't know." I whispered, my voice feeling weaker as I completed my sentence.
I don't know, I never will.
"How did you do it?" I asked, raising my gaze to meet hers.
"Did you not think about it? About them? About him?" I asked, frustration lacing my voice when I saw her weak smile, the rapid blinking of her eyes and the slight sniffling sound as she looked away.
It was too much, the emotion was too much to handle.
"I think we both know the answer to that question, my dear." She said softly, as If I'd break if she was any louder.
But I already was.
"But what if-"
"No." Her stern voice cut through the tense air like a knife, momentarily surprising me before those cold, lifeless orbs softened once again.
"Do not, for one second, doubt yourself. It wasn't your fault. It had to happen, one way or another, it had to. So it happened." She told me and I nodded, taking in a shaky breath as I composed myself, swallowing the rather large lump forming in my throat.
"I think it's time we call it a day, yes?" She said with a little more energy in her voice although I knew she was faking it.
I knew it all too well.
"It's not like you were planning to tell me anything anyway. I don't even know why you're here." I muttered in frustration and saw her eyebrows knitting together.
"You know I can't-"
"Yes, yes, whatever it is, I know. You can't this, you can't that. It's all so frustrating!" I said, clearly tired of all these guessing games as I pulled at my hair and heard her sigh heavily.
"Just-… Just leave. Please." I mumbled in defeat as I closed my eyes, hoping she'd get the hint and leave right away when I opened them.
And she did.
Weekly Power Status
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Ranking 
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