Synopsis
Until now I lived in a small town. But I had to move. Why?
I never went to school. I was an outsider ...
First day in the new school
-My mommy.
"No luck, but a miracle I need." I murmured.
A little later ...
The lady went to the desk, left the bag and asked,
-You are our new student, right? Come on.
- My name is Christina Nelson. I think it does not concern you where I come from. They chased away from my old school, because I broke a boy's nose.
All eyes were in me. A girl came into this memo. It looked like an awesome Angel. Her lady signaled to sit.
"Do you want the place to be free?" She asked me.
That's how it all started ...
Love, hopes, dreams, fear ...
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REEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE
I love this story. I love this story. I love this story. I love this story. I love this story. I love this story. I love this story. I love this story.
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Ooookay well I only made it to part 1 and okay hon this would be a great story but I want to give ya a tip and after this you can choose to ignore or whatever you want. When writing a novel just keep writing till you get done with that chapter. But then go back and re-read it out loud, normally that helps with some Grammer issues, and once you've done that, get someone else to read it out loud. Also when a character it speaking always use proper dialogue. For example: Clouda's beauty still took my breath away, though my longing to be with her could never be fulfilled. "Hey! Are you even listening to me? I swear!" Grace huffed a sigh. "It's her again huh? You're thinking about her aren't you?" I tore my eyes away from Clouda and stared at Grace. "I can't help it, I'm sorry" she groaned and took my hand dragging me away from the courtyard....(end of example) See hon? I hope you'll understand my meaning but I will continue reading your novel because I know that you have great potential.
The story is interesting But author can you work on your language It's getting confusing especially about who is talking I rated low but when i see improvement i'll increase my rating
English wording and composition could be improved. Otherwise! story plot is very good... I will keep myself updated with this book....... Want more like this.....
Reveal Spoiler
The story is good ,the emotions and feelings and fights are wonderful ๐but the English is a little rough you see ,so they need to work on Thier English . I am loving this story so far it is really nice to read ๐๐๐โคโคโค๐๐๐๐๐๐ Very good indeed