Waking up confused, I heard loud knocking on my door and remembered that I ordered chinese. Hurrying to the door, I opened it and saw an annoyed looking asian girl holding a brown bad in one hand a two liter in the other and a receipt sticking out of her shirt pocket. Once she got a good look at me, for some reason she was blushing crimson and stuttered, "Y-your order is here! $23.50 is the total!" Nodding and taking the receipt, I smiled as I gave the girl a $1000 tip. When she saw it, her jaw dropped and she said, "Sir! There is a misprint! You wrote $1000 for my tip. Did you mean to put $10 dollars?" Shaking my head, I said, "No the $1000 dollars is correct. Spend that money wisely when you get it on your check." Her eyes bugging out of her head, the girl watched in slight regret as I shut the door and went to go sit down with my food.
Now where was I? That's right! Just what in the hell happened back there? The girl looked like she saw my naked body or something, and I blacked out in front of my computer after clicking that link. Looking down at my body I realized that I was topless and was shocked to see that my body was ripped. I had the perfect musculature of a fighter or an athlete, or both really. Hurrying to the bathroom, I stared in disbelief at my new appearance. Impossibly handsome face, cobalt blue eyes, no longer baby blue, jet black hair, no longer brown, and ghost white skin with sexy ripped abs and biceps. Hell even my leg muscles are perfect! Plus I seem to have grown a few inches taller. I used to be 5 foot 9 now I seem to be over 6 feet tall now. This is great! Maybe that link wasn't some cosmic joke, but instead my luck has finally arrived? I mean, I just became a mega billionaire and now I have the perfect looks and body that would shame models and idols from any country.
Feeling the knowledge of a simple but overpowered cultivation technique circulating in my mind, and apparently auto circulating through my body, I feel my body growing slowly stronger with every breath that I take. It seems that I am truly on the path towards immortality, and maybe even one day godhood! Looking up with a fire in my eyes, I lift my fist to the ceiling and declare, "I Clyde, shall become the strongest, wisest, most loving, caring man in the world! This I swear!" At my words I heard thunder outside and lightning struck near my apartment building. It seems that the heavens have heard my declaration. Now I must act on my vow and take steps towards becoming the greatest man of them all!
With a new goal in life, and the darkness in my heart erased, I feel free and full of hope for the dawn that is about to break in my future. Now that I have calmed down, lets eat my food before it gets cold yeah?
After eating some good old chinese, I go over to my bed to take a nap. What am I going to do tomorrow I wonder?