Chapter 8: Chapter 7: Slime Report
*Fusion Failed! 2 tries remaining! Better luck next time! *
I awoke to a displeasing notification about the fusion result. Why was the system so happy that I failed. I scratched my head and decided not to think too much into it. Even though the glass bottle looked the same and the slime was still inside, I learned something. I have Fusion Level 1 so it wouldn't make sense for me to successfully complete a fusion on my first try. I also need to be touching the two fusing items together in order for the fusion process to begin. Once the fusion process starts I no longer need to touch the objects. Beginning the fusion takes some time though.
Goo-goo was still staring in my direction but wasn't asking questions about my ability anymore. It didn't look like they were actually looking at me and was deep in thought. Like they were staring into space. I walked over to Goo-goo and put my hand inside of their body.
"Eep!"
Goo-goo suddenly made a loud noise in slime language. It means don't put your hand inside of me because that's weird.
"I'm sorry, it just looked like you weren't all there and your insides feel nice. What were you thinking about?"
"Is the Slime God really trying to wipe out all slime kind?"
"Yes, I'm not lying when I said I heard the Slime God's voice." I had already told the little slime everything I heard. For some reason they still didn't believe me.
"Are you okay with this? You're in charge of Slime Extinction and I know how much you love to kill slimes." Goo-goo was shaking in curiosity and asked me a very weird question.
"I'm obviously okay with this. As you said, I love killing slimes!" I didn't understand why Goo-goo would ask such a stupid question. I thought tiny slimes were smart.
"What are you going to do when all the slimes, except me, are dead?" Goo-goo started asking smart people questions.
"Umm. Uh. I don't know I didn't think that far. Maybe I should ask the Slime God!"
"You should come up with a solution on your own. A minor problem like this is a waste of the Slime God's time."
Wow, the little slime was giving me advice! They also didn't insult me while doing it. I might actually take it into consideration. The only people who gave me genuine advice in the past was my mother and the Hunter's Association. Wait! that reminds me.
"Crap! Sorry, I gotta go Goo-goo. I have to submit my slime report!"
I dashed out of the bedroom and exited my home. I knocked down some bottles on the way but they were food for Goo-goo anyway. I bolted down the marketplace as fast as I could. Few people know this but the marketplace, even though it is crowded, is a short-cut to the Hunter's Association's Main Building.
THUD!!!
I slammed open the doors and went straight over to the female receptionist that takes care of the Hunter's questions.
"I need to submit a report on the status of a monster!" I was breathing heavily when I spoke. Hopefully, they didn't notice.
"...What monster would you like to submit a report of?" The receptionist asked while fanning her hand in front of her face in disgust.
Okay maybe they did notice but my breath wasn't that bad. I opened my mouth to answer the question when their eyes widened in disgust. Maybe eating all that slime was a bad idea. Well whatever, I might as well answer their question any way.
"Slimes! I'm submitting a slime report."
"Oh, it's you." The woman rolled her eyes and pulled out a sheet of paper that was formatted for receiving information about monsters. She handed it over to me while averting her gaze. My feelings were hurt but I tried not to let it show in my face.
I grabbed the paper and the quill that was also handed to me. I stared at the paper for a few hours...I didn't understand a thing. I scratched my head while trying to understand it-
"WHAT DOES THIS MEAN!!!"
-Monster Status Form-
Name:
Monster Name:
Monster Information:
It didn't make any sense. When was the last time I had to fill out a form? Three years I think, maybe I should go practice when I have some time. The woman at the receptionist desk was startled by my outburst. I looked around and saw that everyone was staring at me.
"Can you just tell me how to do this?" I couldn't bear the humiliation, what happened to make me this stupid?! I'm starting to blame the system, I was never this stupid before. She stared at me as I waited for her response.
"Put your name where it says 'Name', Put the name of the monst-"
"Hold on! you're going to fast." I scrambled to write 'Loyd' in the name section, it was kind of sloppy but it will do. I looked up from the paper and noticed she was covering her mouth while quietly laughing. She was laughing at me and was trying to hide it. She wasn't the only one, Everyone in the room was making fun of me. I heard comments like "Ha, he can only kill slimes can he." or "Keep it down he's sensitive!" The worst one was "That young man ruined his life by killing slimes!" I didn't understand why they said it like that, but I knew they were insulting the beauty of slime hunting. I tried to ignore them by turning my focus back to the receptionist. I couldn't handle this humiliation.
"Okay...'sob'...Continue." I tried to not embarrass myself anymore but I couldn't hold back my tears.
"I'm sorry…You put the name of the Monster here." The woman stopped laughing and I could see guilt on her face. Her words were sincere and she was actually trying to help me. She explained how to finish the paper and she collected it quietly. I had completed the form quickly and walked away so she wouldn't see the tears that were running down my cheeks.
I didn't leave the building though, I needed to receive my reward for killing one million slimes. If I were to leave then I wouldn't get rewarded. I walked into a corner in the restaurant-like area of the Hunter's Association building and hugged my knees. I really wish I had some slimes to kill right now. I closed my eyes for a bit so it would look like I'm sleeping instead of crying. I thought I was hiding my sadness pretty good but I was seen through pretty quickly.
"Pathetic." said a Tall, Muscular, and all too Familiar Man.
"The slimes really made him soft didn't they!" said Familiar Man's Companian Number 1.
"He probably wants his Mommy right now!" exclaimed Familiar Man's Companion Number 2.
That last insult hit me hard, tears and mucus and other liquids that mean I'm sad protruded from my body. Not because I'm sensitive or soft, I'm not like that at all. I missed my mother. She decided on going on a great adventure when I was young and I only remember learning my Zendu Techniques and Bow Skill from her.
She was kind of like me in the fact that she didn't like farms and wanted to kill stuff. My father told me they didn't get a divorce and that he was okay with my mother leaving temporarily but my father doesn't act like he misses her. He said he wanted to go with her but for some reason he had to stay. Maybe because he was cheating on her with the farm.
My mother took a few years to prepare for her journey and while she was still home she taught me cool techniques like Zendu Slash. I wasn't a professional at that time but if it wasn't for her I wouldn't be able to do cool stuff like that today. Zendu Slashes were perfect for killing slimes!
I stood up and looked at the man who had insulted me and mentioned my mother. "I am the Great and Powerful Slime Hunter. You have insulted me and my family! Apologize or I will end you!" I hated getting bullied, especially from leeches like him who survive by befriending strong people.
The man paused, then he stopped laughing and slowly walked over to me. A creepy and weird smile formed on his face as he was approaching. It was like a 4 year old tried to draw a straight line on a piece of paper.
"EW! GET BACK! That's gross! How do you even do that with your face, it's so weird!" It creeped me out as well as disgusted me. The look on his face was too unnatural and I almost forgot he was human. The man ignored my comments and stood . He towered over me and stared at me .
"You're just a Slime Hunter: You are weak and sensitive…Powerless and Puny…There's no such thing as a Powerful Slime Hunter. You're as weak as that stupid low-level monster."
"Oof." Not only did he insult me, he also insulted the glorious slime. Forget about my mother, he just made a grave mistake by doing that. "If you believe slimes are weak and easy creatures, then I will show you the struggle of attempting a slime hunt. I challenge you and your companions to a Slime Hunting Duel in the River of Swog! You will feel and taste the pain of trying to kill that 'stupid' monster, the pain I deal with on a daily basis!"
I was staring at the Familiar Man's Companion Number 2 in the eyes. Every hunter in the room was also staring at me, maybe I was a little too loud. I didn't shout it this time either. I didn't like the stares and wanted to go ball up back in the corner but I had to hold eye contact with him in order to be slightly intimidating. After a minute or so-
*30 seconds*
After thirty seconds, the room burst out in laughter, snickers, and gross noises that was supposed to amusement. The man in front of me snorted and nodded his head in agreement after looking back to confirm it with the Familiar Man behind him.
"Next week, River of Swog, sign on it." This time the Familiar Man spoke. His voice showed no signs of amusement and he was quite serious. He was probably the only person who hadn't laughed yet. His atmosphere was quite imposing and his figure was intimidating. I tried to think as to when I saw him before. Oh, he did ten times better than me on the Physical part of the Hunter Test of Strength or whatever it was called. I never got his name so I guess I should ask him now.
"What's your name?" I waited for a moment and stared at him with pleading eyes.
He looked at me for a moment before he spoke, "Verick."
"Verick...That's a very interesting name." I didn't know what to say after learning someone's name. So I chose the most generic line I hear when I tell people my name. Hopefully I can remember it, I have a habit of forgetting important stuff like that. Oh, wait I have the system! Yo system can you help me out here?
*Don't use the word "Yo". I will remind you if you forget there name.*
Thanks! I didn't need to talk out loud to communicate with the system. We are so close we can communicate telepathically! I stopped focusing on the system and paid my attention to Verick who was standing in front of me. He had already got Companion Number 1 and 2 to set up the document. It was placed on a empty table in front of me and Verick was sitting on the other side.
"That was fast!" I spoke out loud but Verick didn't respond. I walked over to the table and looked at the document to try and understand it. This one made even less sense than the last. I scratched my head and stared at it for a few more seconds.
"Write your name at the bottom of the paper." Verick saw my struggles and helped without me asking. Not only did he help me he also didn't laugh. The worst part was his two companions were still insulting me. I looked at the bottom of the paper and saw a line. I motioned to Verick for a pen, I wonder why he didn't give me one in the first place. He called over one of his slav- companions over and they handed it to me.
I didn't look at their face but I could tell they were looking down on me. Not because I was bending over to write my name on the paper or because they were taller than me. They were looking down on me because they thought I was an idiot who could only kill slimes. I'll prove him wrong, I'll prove them all wrong!!! I finished signing the paper and slid it across the table to Verick.
"It is settled then." Verick stood up and left the building, his companions struggled to follow up behind him.
"Loyd Aquita, The Slime Report results have arrived." The receptionist said that just in time. I walked over to the front desk eagerly, I was about to be rewarded for doing what I loved most. I was going to be rewarded, not only for killing one million slimes, but also for including the behaviors, traits, and types of slimes that were not known to humans until now. I also made sure to include how slimes are formed, if you are wondering I can explain it to you later.
"What is my reward?" I didn't hold back, I really wanted something good and I wanted it Now! I'm not talking about God's Pleasure though. After I asked the question the woman reached under the desk and pulled out three objects. She showed them to me and explained them before I asked. After hearing the explanation of each item I created a simpler explanation you can understand-
Object 1: Ancient Book of Slimes(S Class)
This book was created by our ancestors during the time of wars between humans and monsters. They explained that slimes around that time were very powerful and some other history I already knew. What I liked the most about the book was that it included descriptions and information about these ancient slimes. For example:'
-Elder Electric Slime-
A Massive and Very Hostile slime that is made of highly conductive, thick, and sticky liquids. These slimes vibrate their bodies and create an electric energy using friction. This electric energy is capable of immobilizing and weakening even the most powerful adventurers or hunters that are attacked. They can be found in Slime Villages located in Dungeons but are mainly seen by themselves in Labyrinths. The best way to kill these slimes, like most slimes, is through an explosion.
The book also had a cool cover.
Object 2: Slime Summoning Authorization(S Class)
Slimes are considered dumb and undeveloped monsters. People believe if they are summoned they won't be able to complete basic commands. Slimes are also very hard to control. Collars or other tools that are used to keep a monster tamed are useless on slimes because of their non-solid bodies. Since they are not spirits or ghost, binding spells or stuff like that are not useful in controlling them either. For that reason, Slime Summoning has been prohibited in many places because of how dangerous it is. Since I have more knowledge about slimes than most people, I am trusted with summoning and taming these monsters. The authorization was a magical note made by the Hunter's Association.
Object 3: Twelve Slime Monster Cores(S Class)
Monster Cores have plenty of uses other than being sold for money. They can be used as a monster deterrent by driving away ^monster energy. They are usually crafted into things such as swords, drinking pouches, or farmland. The core you receive does different things depending on the monster you got it from.
If it is a monster like a Wolivaar then it would only make Wolivaar leave you alone. The low-level sword I have has multiple low-level monster cores crafted into the hilt to make it easier to fight those monsters. If the monster is more powerful then it will be harder to use monster cores against it. Monster cores like those would be used for crafting potions, medicines, or just strengthening tools.
-Object Explanation End-
As you can see, I called all of the items "S Class" while obviously, they aren't. I called them that out of my own standards since I have the system. They are more useful to me than to anyone else in the world! Not only because I have the system but also because no one else dedicates their life to killing slimes.
After receiving my reward I went straight home. I was also going to tell Goo-goo what happened. I was going to leave out the fact that I was crying and decided on making myself sound as cool as possible. Sadly Goo-goo didn't believe my story and could tell I was lying. They ignored me for the rest of the day and just stared into outer space like this morning.
I decided on trying out fusion for the rest of the day. I was very curious as to what the results would be if I were to combine random items around my home. I looked at the bottle I tried earlier. It said I had two more tries remaining, didn't it?
*Yes. When you run out of tries you will be unable to fuse those two objects again. This shouldn't be a problem since you have multiple bottles of slime around your house.*
Okay, thank you Mr. System. I went around my room gathering as many bottles of slime as I could. I needed to prepare for any failures that I might encounter. I grabbed the bottle of slime that I had previously tried to use fusion on and tried again.
*Fusion Failed! 1 more attempt remaining. Better luck next time!*
I ignored the failure because I had already mentally prepared for it. This time it didn't take too much energy from me when trying to fuse the objects. It seems as that my body was just getting used to the fusing process the first time and put too much energy into it. It also made sense as to why I failed. My fusion skill was only level 1, probably if I were to upgrade it then my chances of succeeding would increase.
*Correction: User must increase their luck in order to increase their chances of succeeding.*
Oh! And how do I do that?
*User must use one of the following: Lucky Artifact or Lucky Item Drop.*
You're pretty smart for a 'slime' hunter system. I repeated the information in my head and a question immediately started to form. Are these the only things I can use to increase my luck?
*No. There are more ways to increase your luck but other options are more challenging or dangerous. It is preferred that you either buy or find one of the following.*
Can't I just learn a spell? That can't be too hard, can it?
*User sucks at magic. It took User almost three years to grasp the basics of Wind Storm Spell. That is why you are only able to the Blow Spell currently. Learning other skills or spells to increase your luck is very challenging so User should stick to the choices that they were given.*
"How did you know that!" It didn't make any sense. How did the system know about my past? My struggles to learn the first step of Wind Storm happened before I got the system!
*This is the Slime Hunter System: the system knows everything about the slime hunters and how to help them.*
Well that makes sense. I stopped telepathically communicating with the system and looked back at my slime bottle. One more attempt on this bottle, I wonder what happens if I fail again. I grabbed the bottle and began fusing. After a few minutes, the fusing stopped.
*Fusion Failed! Oh no, there are 0 attempts remaining. Items are no longer combinable!*
While the notification played in my mind, I watched as the bottle and slime turned a darker color. The bottle stopped looking like a bottle and became soft and squishy. The weird object I was now holding was cold and wet. I opened the "bottle" and poured out the slime onto my hand.
SLRK!!!
"EWW!!"
I shook my hand in the air trying to remove the pasty substance that had just came out of the thing I was holding. Why did I do that! It was so gross! What happened to the beautiful slime liquid inside?!
*The item became unusable and turned into "Useless Paste". Warning: Don't consume.*
Why would I consume this? It's disgusting.
*User has a habit of eating disgusting things.*
I thought for a moment and tried to think of what Mr. System was referring to…Slimes are not disgusting!
*They kinda are.*
Okay fine, they tasted bad but overall, slimes are not disgusting! They are beautiful, unique, and well-deserving creatures.
*Then why are you killing them?*
Because I can, now stop talking! I didn't know the system could be this annoying. I grabbed the nearest bottle of slime to try again. My body didn't react when the fusion process began and the whole process went smoothly. Except for-
*Fusion Failed! 2 more attempts remaining. Better luck next time!*
"GAHH!!!" I released my anger out loud. After calming down I tried again.
*Fusion Failed! 1 more attempt remaining. Better luck next time!*
"COME ON!!!" The fails we're starting to get to me and my eyebrows went inward. I wasn't that mad so I tried again.
*Fusion Failed! Oh no, there are 0 attempts remaining. Items are no longer combinable.*
"CRAP!!!" I threw the "bottle" on the ground and stomped on it in anger. I instantly regretted it because the Useless Paste that was inside got all over my shoe and the floor.
"I can clean that up later." I grabbed another bottle and used fusion.
*Fusion Failed! 2 more attempts remaining. Better luck next time!*
Another failure. I didn't let it get to me and tried again.
*Fusion Failed! 1 more attempt remaining. Better luck next time!*
I knew my luck was bad but how bad can it possibly be. After failing one more time I continued using fusion on the bottles of slime that were located in various places around my house. I experienced failure after failure until I finally was down to 156 of the 1568 bottles I started with.
I grabbed a bottle that contained purple slime and unwillingly used fusion. At this point I was a like a machine, capable of doing this task without thinking. It had already gotten dark outside and my eyes were red from tiredness. If it weren't for my curiosity I would have gone to sleep right now.
As I was activating fusion my body felt very fatigued and fell to the floor. Seeing this Goo-goo rushes to my aid.
"Are you alright Loyd?!" Goo-goo was actually worrying about me. I was about to say no when a notification played in my head. After hearing it a smile formed on my face-
*Fusion Successful.*
-Other Information-
^[Monster Energy]
Monster energy is what causes monsters to exist. Monster energy leaks off of living monsters. The energy floats around an area if it is concentrated with monsters. If any animals are in that area then they have the chance to turn into monsters. The animal will mutate and become more powerful than it was originally. Not only animals but elements(fire, water, etc.) can form monsters. If there is a pond in the area with a lot of monster energy then it can form slimes!
Monster Energy is poisonous and if a monster is consumed within a day after its death then the consumer will die. Monster energy can form a poisonous gas if it is concentrated enough and can only be cleared with Holy spells such as Holy Light. Clearing out an area infested with monsters and covered in monster energy is a job for hunters like me.
Monster Energy is made from different types of magic. Excess magic forms a core in the monster and mainly more powerful forms of monsters have these. Slimes that have excess magic from their monster energy will form cores. These slimes with monster cores are still weak though. This is because slimes need the least amount of monster energy to sustain themselves.
[Slime Formation]
Slimes can form in any source of water as long as it exceeds 3 liters. Slimes can form quickly and if you are not careful about the water you carry they can be contaminated. For this reason, I advised that merchants, traders, adventurers, or hunters that travel or buy water to contain it in a monster repelling material.
I also believe this is the reason why farming is hard in Astasia. Slimes can possibly be forming in the water farmers are using and even if the slimes don't fully develop they are still poisonous to the plants. I submitted all this information to the Hunter's Association in my Slime Report.
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
Yeeker
Yeeker Long chapter
I included a little game: try to make as many ”that's what she said” jokes as you can by quoting this chapter. Put the joke in the comment sections.
I made sure to not include Ecchi.
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone