Chapter 17: From Shadows (4)
If I had to be honest, I have to say that I wasn't expecting to be burdened by this much 'homework' all at once.
Scathach proved herself true when she said that she was planning less subtle approaches. She gave me some trust in exchange for some faith from my part in her training skill and… the result was that the training got a far lot more intense.
The woman was vicious, but there was now a touch of concern mellowing the entire thing to actually nor kill me. And in return I would show utmost determination against all challenges she would put against me.
Sometimes I would win, others I would be beaten without a chance to recover and retaliate.
But the sheer intensity was something I had no reason to truly condemn. It was unpleasant, yes, but I wasn't planning to go back on my words after what happened last time.
She was receptive to my comments as much I was receptive to her teachings. This relationship was only productive now as we both gained something from it.
While I was busy learning how to fight and how to make use of runes, she would take the opportunity to visit the castle. At first everyone was tense. Legitimately so.
Despite her calm and composed personality, Scathach still exuded a degree of inhumanity.
Not that she was willingly causing it to be but… the sense of detachment coming after centuries of being isolated in her realm was enough to leave in her something of an aura. A very unpleasant one at that.
After almost a month of this becoming a thing, she kind of was 'accepted' by most of the castle. Some were still hesitant to trust her to the extent of an ally, but they were well on the way to see her as such.
Mya was the first one to open up, feeling rather interested by the fact that Scathach had found her dishes worthy of notable praise. After their differences had cleared out, the two women had established something of a work relationship.
Every time Mya would be making some food in the kitchens, she would make a meal assigned for the Scottish warrior to try out when I would visit her.
In exchange, the Lady of the Land of Shadows would offer constructive criticism for the girl to improve from. While this seemed an unfair exchange, and so I did think of that at first, I quickly realized how those small 'fixes' actually brought a higher quality to the dishes created by the white-haired young woman.
Speaking of the girl that had confessed to me a while ago, I decided to spend the full month offering a good portion of each day to keep around Mya.
May it be for a silly activity, or something a little more private, the two of us grew more accustomed to this change of pace.
There was no real reason interest in rushing things up as I knew that we were both trying to adjust to the novelty… but I knew that I couldn't just go for the 'safest route'.
I couldn't exactly try to drag this state of relationship for too long and without actually marrying her. While I did so much to change aspects of the current society to 'advance' to something close to what I was accustomed to, I made no real pushes for changing how 'relationships' worked in this age.
Courtship could be used to camouflage the whole 'boyfriend/girlfriend' stage, but courtship wasn't expected to last too long in medieval standards. Especially when both targets were of age and ready to be wedded.
If a marriage wasn't issued in a little less than another month, then things were going to take a turn I really wasn't ready to consider. I would have to deal with a full fall out with Felicianus, and maybe even Altuos… and surely half of my kingdom over my hesitance over something 'as simple' as setting up a wedding.
…
To be fair, this job isn't as easy as they wanted it to sound like.
People marrying for convenience just numbed their brains into believing that it's fine to rush things and if things don't work out then there are solutions to avoid any bad outcome.
But… I wasn't marrying Mya for convenience. There was no gain for me, nor for her.
She already had a safe home, a place where to rest and nap- a place where to experiment and learn.
So the question was apparent for me to pick up. Why was I having cold feet when things looked so fine all in all?
There was no doubt that she loved me, and that I loved her in return.
…
But what if I ended up messing things for her? What if I failed to stand up with my duties as a husband?
It was a big step up from any relationship I had. And boy, my cousin would be grilling me about being mindful of my recklessness when around someone like Mya.
There was nothing noteworthy happening with the kingdom's affairs. The current improvements were still undergoing to be implemented with the rest of the settlements, and I wasn't in a proper position to do some more without screwing too much with my limited resources.
So I just had to juggle what tasks I had been having for some time now… while also handling my own issues.
One thing led to another and… this uneasiness reached out for my usual state of mind.
I was busy getting my ass kicked again from Scathach, this time putting on a bigger fight than I did a month ago and… I ended up losing focus of my stance. It was sudden, and I felt somewhat annoyed as I started to think that later that day I would have to tend to the garden with Mya.
The mere thought got me distracted and… the vicious punch sending me flying onto some trees was enough to take me back to reality.
And while I was back from my thoughts, my teacher seemed to notice my unusual state of mind.
"Enough, you're not putting the usual effort."
I frowned at the harsh comment, but I sighed as she gave me a glare that just hinted at her unwillingness to resume the spar.
Instead of stopping the session altogether, the woman was quick to lead me back to the area we would go to practice runes.
The scene was eerily quiet, and while it wasn't unusual for things to be silent while we were busy producing enchanted minerals, I could tell that the former Queen was trying to understand what was wrong with me while also trying to be all silent and unwilling to directly ask.
I was inclined to believe she was bored and that my current mood was a puzzle for her to solve without ruining it by literally getting a straight answer out of me.
The entire situation lasted about twenty minutes of solid staring and… I sighed.
"I'm having some dumb thoughts about marriage."
My voice broke the little game for her, and her annoyed look turned the normally dull session in something fairly hilarious.
"You're planning to marry? I didn't expect you to be already aiming at that kind of relationship?"
"Let's just say that it is more of a tradition since I'm courting Mya," I answered with a sigh. "We have been like this for a month now, and there is some pressure to see us married before the next month comes to an end."
Silence resumed shortly after, and for a moment I thought that Scathach wasn't going to press for more details on the matter since her attention was once more on her runic stones.
…
"Are you two having troubles as a couple?"
I paused with the engraving process I was going through.
"No."
"You seem sure of it."
"That's because I am sure of it," I confirmed, drawing a perplexed look from her.
"Then why are you making it seem like there is something wrong between you two."
…
"What?"
"Times might have changed, but I reckon that problems need to exist for one to be using those as a reason to be worried or unhappy," The woman explained without hesitation and… I actually nodded at that.
"I suppose the problem is… a worry of mine. A big one at that."
She stopped her own work to stare at me. And she was really confused by what I had just said.
"A worry? You're worried about… marrying?"
"Something like that."
…
"Why?"
I sighed. "I'm… it's tough to say but… I'm afraid I might mess up with Mya. She is so happy, so lively and… what if I do something while we're married and that hurts her."
"She is stronger than she looks," Scathach pointed out. "And you shouldn't worry about that. Especially since you're not planning to do something like that willingly."
"Of course I wouldn't plan to hurt her. That's- but that's not the real issue," I said, completely forgetting about the runes. "What if after we are married, I end up too busy with my work as a king? What if a war comes and I'm busy away from home because I need to be there for the battles?"
Scathach stared at me with renewed annoyance.
"And is this worry… based on something logical, or are you just trying to complicate your life with mostly baseless possibilities?"
"Knowing how the situation is with the northern region, I'm already planning to go to war in two months from now," I admitted grimly. "I allowed Morgan too much time to recover, and I can't allow the Lothian to integrate their new territories."
"And if that happens, then I will make sure that your wife is given plenty of friendly and amusing sights while you're away," Scathach rebuffed with ease. "You're worrying about this, because deep down you feel that you're not enough for her."
…
"What?"
She sighed. "It's common for men to worry about flimsy issues, but Love is not something as easy to scoff at as is picking swords over lances," The woman calmly explained. "You might have picked the best of choices, and yet you will always feel you're just a step too short to fit in with the needs of being enough for your other half's happiness."
I blinked at her words, and I found a sense of rare melancholy within those. It was uncommon for Scathach to be this open about her own emotions.
Sometimes it was because she didn't feel the need to indulge in those… but most of the time it was because she was 'limited' with her picking.
Some feelings just weren't as refined as they were a long time ago, and the bitterness of the lonely realm left her apathetic to any attempt to bring those back.
...Yet now she was looking particularly at ease, a sight that was as unnatural as slightly concerning.
In a world where everything could kill you and where one should always keep the guard up for any ambushes, it was purely odd for her to appear so calm and relaxed.
And for a moment, I lulled myself in an unexpected hope of having my curiosity quenched.
"Do you miss what once was?" I inquired. "The time when you had a reason to believe in living?"
Her red eyes were away from me, yet her head bowed just so slightly at my questioning in a feeble response.
"While many would weep over better days, I'm well-beyond that sorrow," She admitted without hesitation, her voice hollow and devoid of emotions. "But I will always miss those that I've lost. I might see their passing as a necessity, a part of nature that everyone is blessed and cursed at the same time to have. Yet I still feel saddened by the fact they are no longer there to… be here."
…
"Teacher. May I ask you just one last question and… I will let you be with your thoughts?"
At this point, there was no reason for me to stay there if I had her set with this topic. I could recognize I had left her so vulnerable, and in need of time to ponder about this tragic taste of nostalgia.
"You may."
I stood up from my seat, setting down the unfinished runes on the proper boxes and… I spoke.
"Do you believe that, if they were there, they would be happy seeing you saddened over their disappearances?"
She blinked, as if handed a sudden slap that woke her up from her reverie.
Her stare moved up to my face and for some intense moments, I felt my soul undressed by her vicious, hurt and regretful glare.
I expected her to just look and do nothing. To watch and not rebuke with violence.
I was wrong. On several accounts at that.
I barely saw her move off her rock, my brain sickened just momentarily as I felt my footing lost under a sudden pounce for her. My fall was painful, but nowhere deadly or leaving me with a bloody injury.
Yet I was far from safe as her stare felt even scarier and more difficult to handle as it was so close to me.
"You think you can just expect me to bow to something you believe is a moral high ground? That your beliefs can easily berate mine from a pedestal you've built out of luck and easy planning?"
…
"Right now, I'm the teacher and you're my student. I know things you don't, I believe in things you have yet to, and I'm the one that holds the keys to your success… or failure," She continued without restraint. "I hold your destiny, and I will decide if I should bless you with greatness, or leave you a dumb fool of a king."
Her face lowered down and without speaking any further, she pressed her lips onto mine.
Cue the immense dread suddenly becoming confusion, with my mind blanking out at the sudden powerful kiss.
The woman recoiled slowly and without notice, and she looked barely fazed by that intimate action.
"For a month I've allowed you to wander my domain without paying a toll," The woman finally answered my quiet question. "But today things will change. This is the price of entering my realm, this is the price of training under me after your attempt to prove a point you don't have."
Scathach slowly stood up from me and made just two steps away from my weary form.
"You may leave now. This session… I believe we both have much to think about."
I silently stood up, giving her a lengthy glance as to understand what had just happened.
I merely started to make the first few steps toward the exit door that I felt her speak again.
"And one last thing," The teacher muttered suddenly and without hesitation. "If there was even a chance of you hurting someone you care… I would be there to put an end of it, either with words or with a taste of just violence."
The ultimatum was clear, but instead of making me worry for my life… It made me somewhat relaxed at the chance of this preventing me from hurting Mya.
But that kiss? I sure as hell am going to ponder a long time about it.
"Do you know how to dance?"
The question took me out by surprise, my eyes widening as I stared away from the roses I was tending too.
Mya was leaning close to my face, almost making me jump as I realized how close she really was.
Instead of shying away from the proximity, I took the opportunity to give her a peck on her lips.
She giggled in response, but seemed really interested in the topic from the way she was still staring at me.
"A little bit. I never studied much about it."
The young woman hummed as she took a seat beside me, helping me with the pretty flowers.
"Altuos said that important celebrations could have dances," The girl explained, motivating her unexpected questioning. "And I've never danced with someone… it's always alone."
I frowned. "Really? I thought you would've asked for someone to try it out."
"I did, but the guards were unwilling to leave their duties unattended for some petty request."
I suppose they were just trying to appear appeasing but… they are working for the defense of the castle. After what happened with Morgan when I first met her, it was just legitimate to have their patrolling reinforced as an order rather than just a duty.
"And have you asked anyone else?"
She shook her head, and I hummed.
"Then why didn't you ask me? I would've said yes."
"But you're always busy and… I know it wouldn't be nice if I came to interrupt your work," Mya admitted with an uneasy tone. "And I don't want to be a pest and-"
"Mya," I stopped her. "What's wrong?"
…
She sighed. "I know you told me that I could check on you, but now that we are close to a wedding… I don't wish to become a bother-"
"A bother- what?"
What was she talking about? A bother? Who was the deranged bastard I had to have hanged?!
"Since wives are to be subservient to their husbands-"
"Felicianus?" I asked with a tense tone. "Who told you this, was it the Arch-Bishop or-"
"I-I read it. In a book."
I stared at her a little longer, expecting her to give me a name to deal with but… it seemed that it was a book's fault for her misconception.
And what a big misconception at that!
But the more I spoke with her about the matter, the more I realized how it was surprisingly enough the opposite of my own worry.
I was afraid of spending too little around her, while she was afraid of overstepping her boundaries and taking too much time of mine from my work.
It was so stupid, so incredibly dumb… but also a sign that I might have indeed made a mistake by being dragged down by this concern.
And in that clarity of mind I decided to make something so insanely simple as incredibly absurd by all means of kingship.
For a brief moment, I remembered that while the crown was on my head, it wasn't my head.
"Mya, forgive me if I ask you this suddenly… but if you had a full day with me around, how would you want to spend it like?"
A blink, then two. The woman spent a moment reorganizing her thoughts at the immediate question, but she seemed to recover in record time as she spoke just a few seconds after I've asked.
"W-Well, I… I think I would like to wander around the city and see how the people are," She admitted with all the honesty she could muster. "You always told me that we couldn't check around for too long because it was either too late or because you didn't have the time to do so."
I nodded, remembering how difficult it was to wander around Londinium nowadays.
It wasn't like I couldn't spare an hour or two, but it was generally late for me to check the city since my free hours were after training and after I was done with the daily paperwork.
Mya always wanted to walk around in the streets of the city, to see that the castle wasn't just the city and that there were other people other than the guilds' members and the guards.
I could see why that would be her priority.
"And next? Like, do you have a place you would want us to have lunch? Or maybe dishes you would wish to eat for that day?"
Instead of questioning why I had taken such a wild tangent from the previous topic we were discussing, she decided to humor me.
"Well, I wanted to see if the soup kitchen Felicianus spoke about was offering food as good as he mentioned. Maybe even help if they needed an extra hand."
My smile widened at that sliver of selfishness.
I always wanted to give a thorough look at one of my first ideas ever since I started to rule, but the paperwork made things so difficult and… and I wasn't done yet.
"What about the afternoon? A visit around the garden, maybe to tend it as we're doing today?"
Mya sighed, staring at the various flowers around.
"Maybe. Maybe even dance a little around and forget about time and the world."
I should try to see if I had some classic music on my phone. I had the device working just barely thanks to electric runes being used on low currency, but it should hold a song or two about waltzes if I had some saved up.
"Together and without a single worry to interrupt us," I added quietly, gaining another sigh from her.
"It would be so nice, but I know that you've duties and-"
"Tomorrow."
…
"Tomorrow? What about it?"
Oh my, this is going to be difficult to make it clear for her without getting yelled at.
"Well, tomorrow is a good day to spend together with my fiance. To enjoy the beauty of the city, to check on the soup kitchens and… to maybe practice dancing in this beautiful place."
…
…
"Don't you… have paperwork?"
"For one day, I know I can delegate things to Altuos. Felicianus might be annoyed, but considering why I'm taking a day off, I'm sure he will be happy to have another addition to his 'master plan'."
Mya giggled at that comment, but then gave me a concerned look as seriousness returned to the conversation.
"But are you doing this because of our conversation or-"
"I've been worried that I would end up ignoring you once we're fully settled together. Once we set our marriage and… let the vows take place," I explained with a patient hum. "And I don't want to make you feel forgotten."
"Why- Why would I ever think that?" The young woman rebuked. "I know that your work as the king isn't an easy feat. That you don't waste time- that you handle urgent matters."
"Most of the time, yes," I replied with a nod. "But I still believe that you should be forbidden from checking on me whenever you wish. From being allowed to be what I want you to remain as."
A frown adorned her beautiful face. "You want me to-"
"Visit me. Humor me. Speak to me when you need to talk to me," I listed out without hesitation. "I want you to be Mya, not a servant. I want you to be my wife, just like you want me to be your husband."
I proceeded to deliver a quick kiss to her, adding awe to her shock.
"Y-You- but what about Altuos? Wouldn't he be mad that you leave him that much work?"
I gave her a devious look at that.
"He told me that he was having less paperwork than usual while we were conversing on my own stack of paper and ink. I'm sure he will survive through it."
Mya giggled, this time being the one to lean towards me for a kiss, this one longer than the previous ones.
And with that in mind, the setting of a proper date was planned. A date filled with love, discoveries, fixes, and a gran finale to remember for the rest of our lives.
But as we plotted our little day together, two cloaked individuals were slowly making their way towards the Londinium. Their objective? Meeting King Joseph.
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