"And here I thought you were just here to kill me to take my supplies." Francis said in a tone that was way too calm to actually mean what he said.
Zoey had just finished the explanation on how a man named Louis told them over a radio that there was going to be a helicopter evac at the roof of Mercy Hospital.
"Uhuh, I would have started that big gun up and shredded us like that mess," Deshawn said as he pointed towards the pile from whence they came.
Bill grinned, thinking the same thing.
Jason knew Francis was one of the playable characters in Left 4 Dead. While an inner voice was telling him not to trust strangers and the game didn't equal reality, Jason ignored it and figured Francis would automatically join them on the trip to the hospital.
He was busy pilfering some of the supplies Francis had gathered. It was like a cosmic coincidence or an activation of his [Halo] skill. Francis had plenty of the ammunition that Jason required! Jason wasn't completely happy though. Where were the explosives and med-packs? It would make this whole thing much easier, not like you are forced to carry one of each in real life.
"Thanks for that, by the way," Jason asked as he pocketed another mag for his rifle.
"Ya, fuck you kid, I already hate you."
"Ignore him, he's... eccentric," Zoey face palmed. "As I was saying, do you know a way to the hospital? It seems like we are pretty blocked in here and we are running out of time."
"Of course, princess," Francis faltered from a possessive glare that Deshawn shot him. Francis really hated the apocalypse, where were the available women that didn't cry when you touched their hand?"
"Err, yea, I know the perfect route. You won't like the way to get there though. I hate it myself, actually," he trailed off.
"It doesn't matter," Zoey said in a tone that brokered no argument. "Take us there."
"Whatever," Francis waved as he opened the steel door behind him. After the group replenished their ammunition from the plentiful stores Francis had, he lead the way.
As they walked through a few corridors, Jason had to ask. "How did you get all that ammo anyway? And a fifty cal? Not to mention the odd placement choice."
"Haha!" Francis laughed as he continued taking them to who knows where. "I'm what you would call a 'legitimate businessman' that bought this shipping company." He actually did finger quotes in mid air as he talked.
"Since I have to protect myself from the damn government, they're the worst, by the way," he trailed off. "I had a nice stockpile. Too bad these monsters started when they did. I was due for a shipment of rockets that never came, now that, would've been fun."
Francis stopped walking as they arrived at the destination. He grabbed a map and crowbar that was hidden under the table before sticking the bar underneath a floor tile and prying it loose.
After Francis opened the metal trapdoor that was hidden underneath it and everyone was hit with the rank smell of raw sewage. "Tadaaaa!" the biker said dryly as he threw the crowbar across the room. He didn't need it anymore.
"I was prepared for everything, too bad the infection targeted people so randomly. I just want to make my piece here. We all know it was the government. At least they got there due. Now let's hold hands and take on this hateful task together."
Zoey's nose scrunched up before she sighed. She wasn't going to let this creep win by replying to him or backing down.
Jenny started wailing louder, but made her way down first like she didn't even care anymore.
Deshawn followed, hopping in, with Zoey trailing behind.
"What is wroooong with that bitch?" Francis asked Jason as they waited for Bill to climb down.
"Who knows? I talked to her a little at the beginning of the night, but she hasn't said a word in hours. She just sobs." Jason replied.
"Eh, her? Who cares about her, she's broke. I was talking about why that fine ass didn't pick me over the gangster over there. I don't know how I missed her when you people first showed up," Francis said wistfully.
Confused and exasperated, Jason refused to reply and climbed down after the rest of the group.
Once his eyes adjusted to the sewer lit only by the dim lights of their flashlights, his eyes were met with the sight of Zoey on top of Deshawn. She was straddling him while stabbing a tongue that was wrapped around his neck. Bill came up beside them and shot the smoker in the head point blank with his side arm. The veteran knew better to use his explosive, flaming rounds so close to his comrades. Jason ignored the voice in his head that told him he wouldn't have thought that far ahead.
Although his comrades were safe, Jason could tell that two of them were now angry. Very, very angry.
Jason had literal shit up to his knees. All of the group did. Jenny's oversized t-shit was dipped in the fecal matter.
Deshawn though, was pulled on his back and had a smoker's head explode on top of him. The kill may have added to Zoey's mess covered figure, but Deshawn was the one that no longer had a clean area on his body. They were all a soaking mess.
They were so dirty that Jason bit back the joke about Deshawn getting tongued three times tonight. The smokers seemed to love the man.
It didn't stop Francis from cackling at the mess they were in when he joined the group in the sewer.
After they composed themselves, they followed Francis's directions and eventually came upon a red ladder that he pointed towards and said, "He it is!"
It was also the perfect time for Deshawn to get back at the biker, so he shifted his foot under the quagmire of sewage and tripped him before watching him fall face first into the murky liquid.
If anyone else on the team saw what happened, they didn't rat him out. Francis deserved it. He wasn't near as bad a Spencer, but he was still an ass.
"Dammit! It always happens like this!" Francis yelled as he got up and kicked his leg into the air. "Its like avoiding puddles in a rainstorm during a walk, only to stop in a puddle by your front door! I hate this!" he yelled as he ran to the ladder and kicked it while he continued to throw his tantrum.
"You have enough time acting like a pre-schooler, kid?" Bill asked as the rest looked upon the scene with faint amusement.
"Shut up, you decrepit bastard, like you can even remember what it was like," Francis bit back as he started to climb up the ladder.
"My hands were clean-ish, and now he covered the ladder with his mess, thanks Bill," Jason cried morosely.
"HAH!" everyone heard Francis yell down the ladder as he finished his climb.