Chapter 6: Konohagakure's Insanity.
Her day was going to be simple really. Wake up, use Mind's Eye of Kagura for a quick second, do some stretches and exercises, take a shower, get some ramen with walnuts, and go back to walking up trees. She didn't plan on doing anything special!
Albeit, she did somewhat figure out her guard's schedule. One group watched over her while she slept and did her morning stuff, and after she ate her breakfast they swapped out to the other group. Presumably, there was a 3rd and 4th squad for whenever the first two squads were out of the village.
Really, she knew she was a VIP, but it seemed like such a waste! All that time they could have spent training, or socializing like normal people. Then again, they were ANBU. They were practically the poster children of mental issues. Itachi, Kakashi, Yamato, Every Root Member, and Yugao for people she could point out specifically! Really, they truly were a bit crazy.
But that was beside the point. She didn't plan on doing anything super special today. But after breakfast when she checked with Mind's Eye of Kagura, and found a very specific chakra... Well, she couldn't help but do a little trolling.
Her head was pounding less than it was yesterday from doing it in the middle of the village - probably from the fact that she had fully healed from having anywhere from decades to centuries of memories shoved into her head.
So, she kept her Mind's Eye of Kagura on as she walked through the streets ignoring the varying looks. 'The fucking balls on him are insane.' She barely kept herself from bursting out in a cackle as she stepped into a Dango place. Because, yes, Konoha had places dedicated solely to dango. 'Really. Konoha has to somehow produce the most insane shinobi. What, you decide to take a vacation and come back home for a little bit?'
Getting an order from the lady who was probably nice to other people, she sat down directly next to a non-descript child eating dango. 'His Chakra Control truly is perfect. You'd probably need Sage Mode or Mind's Eye, huh?'
Taking a glance around a few streets she'd spot a specific chakra. 'Huh, I guess his sensing capabilities are pretty good too. He can sense Sasuke a few streets away in the middle of Konoha.' Munching on her Dango next to the disguised criminal who in his 'normal kid' disguise was looking at her weirdly and slowly scooting away. She said, not really caring for her volume, "His Chakra Control could use some work huh?"
Maybe she was insane too for just outright saying that, but eh, he was loyal even if everyone else didn't know it. Also, seeing his fake disguise freeze for the smallest fraction of a second before a surge of chakra had all of her guards falling into some kind of illusion was kind of hilarious. 'Also, holy shit Itachi, at least look at them! Fucking bullshit Uchiha.'
The next moment everyone in the Dango stand fell under a genjutsu, and she probably was under one too. "It's pretty rude to put comrades under a Genjutsu Itachi, y'know?" A moment didn't even pass before the world-famous smooth voice of Itachi Uchiha came out of some six-year-old punk kid's mouth.
"They told you?" She munched on her Dango a little bit before nodding.
"Can't have me going Kyuubi on ya out of nowhere if you show up with your boyband." There was a moment, whether he was contemplating mindwiping her, killing her, or was just baffled she really didn't know. Heck, for all Naruko knew Itachi could just be contemplating his grocery list.
Finally, he asked, "What do you want Naruko Uzumaki?" A smile played at her lips. 'Good. He's willing to play some ball.'
Thinking about it for a moment she shrugged, "I kinda wanted to see what you would do, to be honest. But I'll make a deal. Imprint the Shadow Clone and Multi-Shadow Clone Techique into my mind, as well as pass along a message, and I'll teach Sasuke tree walking and water walking, as well as get him to re-awaken his Sharingan."
A moment passed, but she knew he would accept, she played the Sasuke card after all. It was his one true weakness. "What message?" 'Gotcha.'
A few minutes later she was stepping out of the Dango place munching on her last stick, with her guard following her unaware of the conversation that had taken place, and no one knowing that one of, if not the most dangerous criminal alive knew that the Yondaime Mizukage was under a genjutsu.
Truly, she didn't plan for it to be a great day, but it was certainly turning out to be, huh?
...
Okay, maybe the day wasn't so great. Naruko fucking hated Tree Walking. Really, it was a few hours later and she was fucking done with it. She didn't like heights damnit! Besides, running sprints up a tree with a leaf stuck to your forehead just should count as torture! Okay, she was exaggerating but still! 'This is why you get sla- I mean Shadow Clones to do this kind of stuff!'
Doing a flip in mid-air to do a three-point landing, she'd grumble a little bit as the leaf fell off. She knew that this exercise was great for honing her control, focus, and overall physical attributes, but still! 'It's alright. Just imagine everyone's face when with one punch you knock out Sasuke's lights!'
A totally not insane giggle escaped her lips as she picked up another leaf. 'Only a day or two more of this and I'll be good.'
Once rushing up to the tree, she began to practice once more. Truly, once she decided to reveal she knew Shadow Clones, she could have much more fun. After all, isn't it great to hurl Kunai and Shuriken at your training Shadow Clones?!? Is it fun to beat them up while running on the trees or walking on water?!? So much better than, this!
She fell again. 'Shit!'
It was nearing evening when she was finished with her training, taking a moment to breathe and relax before heading back to her apartment, when one of her ANBU guards materialized in front of her. "Hokage-sama wants to see you." In the next moment, he was gone. 'Or he was a clone in the first place using some kind of technique or jutsu to throw his voice.'
Shrugging it off as ANBU stuff she'd stretch for a moment before stretching out her Mind's Eye of Kagura. 'Aah, he's in the Mission Room, that makes life simple.'
Walking towards the Academy she simply walked up the wall before knocking on a window. "Old man, open up!!!!"
The groan of suffering at another ninja (in training) refusing to use doors was positively amazing.
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
BalancedSelfInsert
BalancedSelfInsert The Itachi was purely spur of the moment. But I figured establishing that Itachi does in fact check up on Sasuke to make sure that Danzo and Hiruzen are keeping up their end of the deal was good.
Also, yes, ANBU does watch her 24/7. Because why the fuck would you not? The Minato one shot confirmed that at least while the 2nd war was on (and probably the third) Kushina was pretty much permanently inside of a seal. With what appeared to be two CAPTAINS watching her 24/7. A squad watching your free-roaming Jinchuriki isn't that much of a stretch.
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