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(Game of Thrones) The Pale Khal
4.42 (11 peringkat)
Ringkasan
Jon snow is kidnapped by slavers while his father was away fighting in the Greyjoy rebellion. How is an 8 name day old boy supposed to survive in a place like Essos with only his direwolf pup as a companion.
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the story is not really bad but there are many problems the grammar and especially yhe dialogues need work then we have many plot holes.. how jon had ghost when he was only 8? how a kid 8 y old with only months of training can kill 3 grow men who fight at pits? unrealistic why jon snow didn't ask of the guy from dorne to send a message to his father so ned knows where jon and maybe save him?? kal said jon snow is a westerosi name..and he named him jonos snow..wow amazing deference all this and more small plotholes make the story not bad but not really good either!
the story has many holes like an 8 year old being able to defeat 3 adult fighters and honestly jon's idea turns into an avatar and just laughs but that's just my opinion I wish you good luck with the story
i give you 5 stars keep up the great work and I hope you will keep writing I love the story can't wait for more I really want you to give him dragons maybe one or two don't want to try to tell you how to write but would like to see dragons[img=update][img=update]
This story is very simple to read and perceive, and in itself quite uncomplicated, but very interesting and even catchy. ...............,....................................................
this fanfic of yours is a wonderful GOT Fanfic to be read . it has potential to evolve more while the story goes. background and other aspect of this novel is wonderful coming from my perspective 5 ⭐ hoping to read more from this FF praying for your good health 🙏 👍☺️👌
Even if the Start is a bit rushed, and the Updates paused for 2 Months, I still enjoy this Fan-fic. Keep up the great work. I hope for more Chapters
Good story....A nice character development .. although chapters are small they are good 👍😊.... Hope not to Stop the work..... ... A different fanfiction compared others ...were story doesn't takes place in westors ...... there is a system tag line....so far in the story there is no system
Interesting premise, but is lacking a fleshed out background. Overall good writing despite it being pretty short... I just wish it involved the show's characters more.
5 stars by far the beat fic I’ve ever read keep up the great work