Sinossi
**THE BOOK IS IN REVISING STATE**
**PLEASE BE PATIENT**
Ashborn Locke is trapped in his mother's favorite game, "FINDING OBJECTS," which initially seems easy.
He must fight desperately to stay alive and return to his mother, his only family.
Fierce creatures and other players won't hesitate to target and kill him.
However, Ash discovers cheat items, making him one of the strongest players in the game, yet he is determined to find his way back home.
#no-harem #antihero #genius #multiple-world #game #artifact #army-building
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The_Procrastinator Contribuito 520 -
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Regali
-- Regalo
ricevuto Stato Settimanale dell'Energia
-- Classifica
Potenza 
-- Pietra del
potere Ti potrebbe piacere anche
10Recensioni
4.2
- Qualità di Scrittura
- Stabilità degli Aggiornamenti
- Sviluppo della Storia
- Design del personaggio
- Sfondo del mondo
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Sorry for my English, but I love reading so much that even a translator doesn't bother me. The beginning isn't bad, the protagonist's motivation is great. However, the unhappy, poor family is presented too directly. I would understand the situation better if you showed the ‘hardship’. Bills, refusing to go out with friends, mum's problems with her second job, in short, some indirect methods that would say, ‘poor mother and son who can only rely on themselves’. For example, the son comes home and sees his exhausted mother, who is still preparing dinner after her second job, and gives her the money he earned himself (for the first time), and she cries and apologises for not being able to give him a better life. As for all the following chapters, there is a serious lack of detail. For example, was the protagonist wearing his own clothes or some kind of fantasy attire? Are the things he found modern or fantasy? What about the clothes he found? I mean, these are critical things to determine whether this is a high fantasy or low fantasy world. The following scenes are no better. For example, how did the protagonist manage to remain unnoticed while observing an entire village of goblins? Was he far away? Were there few goblin patrols? What is the approximate number of goblin villages? The transition between scenes is somewhat abrupt and resembles slides. However, the final point is the battles, which are inadequate, meaning that there should not be battles in essence, only ‘he swung his sword and four bandits fell dead.’ I mean, you choose your protagonist's class as a warrior and write such poor battles? And also, why does the protagonist kill the bandits so easily and cold-bloodedly? Well, I understand that he saw that they were bad and all that, but are you saying that a person can just snap their fingers and turn into a cold-blooded killer? So, your character's motivation is great, really strong. You're trying to write something unusual, at least not cliché, but you're really lacking in practice and experience.
Come on, it’s only chapter 6 and the MC is already looking this pathetic. “Oh I won’t kill you why don’t we work together and all that shit” sounds like the author is living in a kids storybook
The author has a little way to go and some editing to do, but there's so much potential here! I believe the author is going to be giving us something pretty fun, unique, and interesting with this novel. Keep it up!
Great storyline, great action and the system is easy to understand! Will be reading more!
The story is really good , the character dynamics really draw you in and the system is easy to understand!!!
I love how the system is made, it's clear and not confusing. Ash's journey is exciting, and I'm looking forward to where it takes him. The story is beautifully written, and every word is easy to understand. Good job, author.
Early review based on first few chapters. An engaging premise with a focus on collectibles and items. The writing is engaging and makes me want to see what happens next! Looking forward to seeing more character dynamics in the story. Keep up the great work
Can't say much about the story yet (only 5 Ch. out, ultra fresh) However, it piqued my interest, definitely has an interest/fresh-out take on the game/sys. genre, feeling like partially survival games, making me thought of 'the forest' a bit. And ultimately, I have FUN reading it!
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Mostra Spoiler