It's more like he is calling for his pet than a fellow warrior.
"Here buddy!" Thor smiled, waving at me like a kid that had saved his best friend a seat.
Movies · CORNBRINGER
"UARghh! aaaaH sigh sigh!" Lady Cerwyn shrieked in pain and tears, seeking a new embrace from her little knight.
TV · Duncan_Randar
I have only one suggestion to make, you need to take into consideration how people in general, the NPCs will interact with Campione. Some arbitrary lines without consideration will hinder the flow of the story. The interactions in this chapter is more suitable for a crack fic.
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So far the story was going well. It has be understood that the MC is an uncrowned king, who is feared first. No one is going to approach him as depicted in these lines. My comments are on the view that this fic has more serious elements than comedy elements. These lines are more suited for crack fics.
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MC need to invest points in his EQ...
Seeing this scene, Su Yi also helplessly shook his head. He only killed a few hundred of their kind these few days. Why were they so afraid of him?
Eastern · Crustacean
Infinity stones are supposed to have infinite energy.
ch 129 Chapter 126 | Three Laboratories, Different Projects.
Anime & Comics · BingeFics
From modern era? They have devices that can store a creatures weighing tons into small balls. They have the technology to teleport the said balls to miles away. We are backward in comparison.
ch 0 4 Pokemon master of tactics: Chapter 4
Anime & Comics · alex02373
You may have to refine your story a little bit. The weight behind the campione title is considerably less in the story. Since Fleur was able to identity Harry as a campione her mother would definitely be alle to do the same and you could have added her reaction giving more life to the story.
ch 0 3 Reacclimating and World Cup
Anime & Comics · DanteMustDie
It's ok. If he is a big fan of One Piece he will be trusting Straw hats. Buy I hope he doesn't tell that they are from a manga.
"That...I think I'm from another world."
Anime & Comics · Imbreak
But he has no experience of a Kage level ninja...
What a joke! A Kage-level expert like Natsuo attacked a small Root base alone, it would be strange if they could find a trail leading to him.
Revival of Uchiha, Starting with a Harem
Anime & Comics · TitoVillar