Nimav - Profile

Seems good enough to me, it's not meant to be perfect, just some words that escape translation here and there like the wargs.

No, seems like a Find&Replace misshap with whatever character it was originally.

The guy earlier said it well. Too much in this chapter doesn't add up and seems more like trying to justify things to readers which got convoluted and worse as it went, I posted in one of the early paragraph comments why. You missed good chances to set up internal conflicts for him if he was normal, or set up external ones if he was altered so significantly from modern values after passing through or absorbing essences.

Hey man, we all grow and I think you have a great starting point, the whole fantasy thing can be developed. If not necessarily by reading, I think this would be a proper way to use AI, transforming text to fantasy style and picking and chosing what suggestions to build on; in time you won't need it anymore. Also I recommend pretty much anything by RA Salvatore if you want some style inspiration.

It's quite good balance I think in terms of dialogue and overall a much better way to deliver important aspects such as character personalities and development than describing stuff like other authors (especially stuff like describing that a character was shocked and in pain for 3 days, that really gets me, there's 0 impact to the reader). If there's one particular thing I would say it's that your style is too formal for this type of writing, "he identified a group of orcs" for example feels more like an action report than an immersive novel. To try and illustrate what i mean: "feeling the air shift he quickly sobered from his light dreams and stood peering into the darkness which now held little sway over his eyes. He saw the gangly creatures with bodies as misshapen as the crude weapons they were wielding creeping towards them. 'Orcs!' *fisssht he yelled loosing and arrow into the head of the nearest enemy. The dwarves were quickly roused to their weapons as all those worthy of the company of Thorin oakenshield have fought and trained for years...."

To quote "father-in-law" Aethyta: Kick 'im the quad!

Fair point, focusing movie-wise is also probably best, no point in throwing Tom Bombadil into the mix. And it also makes sense then to have all the changes compared to the book lore as it's already a parallel universe of sorts in the movies and they definitely don't cover this level of detail.

What does "a few years" mean? She was was born towards the begining of the second age, so I'm guessing that if her dissapearance is recent then you interpreted that the choice of fate was passed down beyond Elros, to his children as well. Personally, from what I've seen, this choice only ever seemed to be available to the elven line, once the choice to be mortal is made, descendants only get extended lifetime. Unless of course all that adventuring Tindomiel did somehow brought her the same boon as Tuor to be granted elven fate? Anyway, with Elwing's involvement, which I'm pretty sure somehow breaks Manwe's decree that she would not walk among men and elves outside of Valinor, means that Aldril is clearly a close relative of Elwing and not just a descendant, and if we take Tindomiel as the mother, than him as a great-grandson of Elwing makes sense. Wonder who the father would be. I basically threw all your hints on the side of identifying the mother.

Yeah, get all that Longbottom Leaf! I also hear the "salted pork is particularly good" over there.

So given all that, in addition to what the voice said in his head when outlining the result of the wishes, how on earth was he unsure of him being in another world.....

Whatever he decides, he'd better get some Hobbit's Leaf before leaving!