Righteous_Serpent - Profile

The discrimination was done mainly when Sejnu were still up. Danzo fears Uchihas, 2nd Hokage hatred was the last Hokage who discriminated Uchiha, Sarutobi did nothing wrong to them, Civilian side awed them, as they were the one founding clan that survived, Hyuugas got rivalry relationship with them so ofc there will be some hate between them, don't see a problem with other clans. U can't say they were discriminated after 3rd Great Ninja War, before maybe, during the 2nd rule yes. But after 3rd GNW there was only maybe from Danzo and his lackeys, but i will say that was rather fear as he himself was quite a sharingan fanboy.

so? what's ur point I stated that all civilian shinobi were either orphans or children of shinobi.

Well her father is confirmed genin.

he wouldn't ... it was never stated that he would, he just assumed that. Ofc he would get the strength, speed of the body. Sharingan he would probably have it the way Kakashi had, people seem to miss the fact that differentiate Kakashi and Uchiha members is only the fact that they can produce another type of chakra that affect their eyes, if it can activate Sharingan for the first time that's what probably is a switch on/off, Orochimaru wouldn't be able to create it.

???it forces, it literally takes someone soul from pure land and places it into somebody else's body, they can't choose if they want it or not. well ofc the souls are not in the corpse of the person, the sacrificed one was transferred to the pure lands after the ritual was made( u can see that after releasing edo tensei only one was being sent) that edo tensei was used and I never said that. and about the ashes part I totally forgot, I didn't read naruto in 3 years

What's wrong with u... I will quote the whole reply that u are referring to. "I didn't want any ties to a clan, or having to deal with the usual 'I need to hide my eyes' trope. So instead, he simply doesn't show these eyes. No one can detect they exist, his eyes are red and it had been mistaken for a Sharingan in a future chapter, but he doesn't have any tomoe in his eyes. The wish ''Hide the physical change'' basically makes it so no matter what he does, get bloodlines, techniques like Orochimaru's snake ones, they don't change his physical appearance. If I was unclear with this I'm sorry, let me know how I could've better worded it." It's really clear, u are stating exactly what I wrote last time, next time read ur whole comment, not 5 words. Do not make me look dumb and ignorant cuz u can't say that's ur fault.

So? I'm giving u a review if u were going to get only reviews like great job u will never improve and I'm only been pointing the logical mishaps and things that every writer should consider like research, u can get every information about Naruto from wiki's and other sites or simple things like thinking what would happen and how the story would progress if u changed some things, it's not some advanced things, just some basics that can be done easily even for someone that has zero knowledge about writing.

You could just change the past to make such a plot meaningful.

want me to quote u ? "The last thing I want is just the ability to hide my chakra affinity, I don't need to cause a storm just because I made the paper rave.' " "The wish ''Hide the physical change'' basically makes it so no matter what he does, get bloodlines, techniques like Orochimaru's snake ones, they don't change his physical appearance. If I was unclear with this I'm sorry, let me know how I could've better worded it." U're so inconsistent, but okay, never it was stated in any wish that mc wants his sharingan to be undetectable. U just made it up in ur head. U said it urself hide the physical changes so they still would see his sharingan with other means that just looking at his eyes.

Unfortunate for u it's not a reasonable one, not once in any au would something like that happen, even if theoretically 3th was evil, he would be never so stupid to let something like that happen to jinchuriki, he would rather give him to Danzo, it's just not reasonable in any way after the destruction Konoha taken from 9tail to not have any last line of defense in case war

I couldn't get through the first chapter, it seems for me like the author is simping for Sasuke. -How can u tell that someone like Naruto was luckier when being ostracized from the time he could remember(just read what it does to human if u don't know the result of something like that), ofc I'm not saying that Sasuke had it light, but he had the help to overcome his problems from the whole village, he just didn't want it. -How can the author tell that Itachi is a hypocrite when he has just chosen the most optimal option he could take at that time (he was just 13yo kid at that time btw), he didn't have other options, could u tell what would u do? face the annihilation with the rest of ur clan or just maybe give a chance to live life to his brother, -Itachi takes Fugaku MS and replaces it with Sasuke. Do u know that eyes grow with body ? -Impossible 'sharingun' growth, he is 7 and without any training, he gets fully evolved 'sharingun', when even the youngest Uchiha that awaken 'sharingun' got only one(The youngest person to awaken 'sharingun' is Izumi Uchiha at the age of 5)... -And after over relaying on 'sharingun' he still makes some comments about how Naruto is talentless and without Kurama is total weakling, Idk how others think but for me it seems like the whole Sasuke strength is 'sharingun', only after getting it Sasuke started growing strength and naruto talent is not mediocre or low, he learned Kage bunshin in hours and Rasengan in a week, that feat took Jiraya 3 years, Naruto just didn't have a way to learn something before getting to know Jiraya, after which he cought on to Sasuke in no time. Now please compare author a Sasuke without sharingan with him medicore talent(He really is not genius, idk why people think that when his growth before sharingan was slow, not comparable to likes like Minato, Orochi, Itachi, Shisui, he had resources to grow stronger but only in that time learned a couple of jutsus.) and Naruto without Kurama that was not ostracized and got similar resources that should have as the son of 4th hokage. If u compared let me know ur answer :)

Well, it's pretty good, but there are some mistakes. -Timeline is a mess, -Sharingan doesn't come from Otsutsuki, but from shinju, as is the sage body and wood-style, from Kaguya side u get dead bone pulse and byakugan. Hagaromo inherited it the same way Naruto his whiskers, -In Naruto world chakra is more soul thing than body, ofc body is influencing it, but u can say that Yamato isn't Hashirama, even if he has DNA of Hashirama, which for me seems like his chakra isn't that attuned to wood as was Hashiramas(someone is gonna say something about Madara, but he is a transmigration of Indra direct son on Hagoromo). Orochimaru even after switching bodies still has his immense chakra and the same affinity(wind), and lastly, Edo Tensei, which literally forces soul in somebody body, changes them to look the same as they were before they died and having the same bloodline, if the body was the source of these things, the undead ninjas wouldn't have the same bloodline. Besides these points, this novel is pretty good, most people would not care about these things, but I really don't like when someone is putting the same knowledge as in our world in a world where it's clearly different, I don't see any chakra in our world, so the worlds clearly differ in a way. If it was that 'easy' to get fully activated bloodline as activating genes, then Orochimaru would be god be the time of chunin exams. If i made some mistakes fell free to point it to me :)

then u must really like me and hate urself ;)

No, they are not brainwashed, they just don't have better choices, u don't see a civilian shinobi from ordinary parents, all civilian shinobi presented in naruto were orphans, they didn't have better choises, cuz they couldn't go to another school that shinobi one. All civilian shinobi u see are all orphans Jiraya, Orochi, Minato... I clearly won the whole confrontation between us, u just don't want to admit it, stating that's how u were trying to write it :)

I'm crying, can u write something that's canon and not ur imagination? I don't really have much time to write a reply to someone who isn't even giving canon statements( i don't know if something like the Uchiha police force was forceful in anime but if it was, it was clearly in filler.) The fact that civilians can become shinobi is as good as the fact that you also can become paid killer...And shinobi is paid killers, they still lived on mainly from missions that civilians gave them and they still had to obey daimyo for example 12 guardians of daiymo were most likely created before the era of shinobe villages. Besides for what are u even arguing when naruto is settled in feudal japan setting and shinobi there serve feudal lord(daimyo). And stop lying about insufficient chakra, cuz that was never a thing, they just didn't pass examination, and most of them are orphans of children of shinobi who were probably oprhans...

No, u don't know... U are clearly lacking in ur knowledge about Naruto world... Kage may or may not be the strongest in the villages cuz they are chosen by the council(like Jiraya wasn't Hokage even if he was stronger than Hiruzen, and am not saying that prime Hiruzen was weaker than Jiraya only the facts that old Hiruzen was weaker than both Jiraya and Tsunade, I don't know about other villages other than leaf), and strong not rule the weak in naruto world, the wars in shinobi world don't include civilians they are clearly shinobi wars, and shinobi do mission for money that they get for civilians which clearly mean that without civilians there is no shinobi, and I'm here not even saying a thing about daimyo who rule whole country included shinobi villages. Whole shinobi system revolves around missions given by civilians, so stfu if u are lacking in brain...

If u talk about some bad face-slapping cultivation novel then u have to change ur tastes, besides, why are u comparing cultivation and naruto it doesn't make any sense, the strongest person doesn't rule in the naruto world, Kage doesn't have the highest authority in their country daimyo(a civilian) has, without civilians there wouldn't be shinobis... did u even read/watch naruto if yes then watch it again and now don't skip anything cuz u are clearly lacking, in naruto the civilian are people that shinobis serves. If u think that Kishimoto wouldn't care about writing about child experiments and didn't want to even mention rape cuz it's to hight level s**t, then u need to re-read/re-watch naruto, cuz Kishimoto wouldn't care about something like this when he wrote worse. Don't write something and don't compare the cultivation novel cuz it doesn't make any sense even the energy they manipulate isn't even close when in most cultivation novels they use spiritual energy...