PhoneAddiction - Profile

The premise sounded interesting so i tried reading it, but from the get-go the author referred to the female lead as a “he,” if that gives any idea of what the grammar is like in this book. There are small mistakes that make it seem like the chapters were written and posted without another read-through, so sometimes there are two consecutive punctuations (like a sentence is ended with a period and a comma) or there are commas or slashes in the middle of words (ex. I,s—> Is, or co/ame —> came). The characters also seem kind of shallow and when the ML is in a coma and the FL doesn’t leave him, he just happens to suddenly fall in love with her. The relationship needed more development than just him listening to her when he was in a coma and suddenly “falling in love” with her. Also, the point of view randomly switches from first person (FL’s POV) to something like third person omniscient (to see ML’s POV) for two paragaphs and then back, which is kind of confusing and it would have felt much less random if it was just kept in third person the whole time. Also the tenses in this constantly change. ....Saying all that, I think this story would have been more readable if the author had a decent editor/proofreader and I wish the author/translator good luck (bc I’m not sure whether this is an original or translated). While I probably was pretty blunt in my opinion of the grammar/lack of story and character development, this story is still better than some other ones I’ve seen out there.