executionner - Profile

The subject is interesting, the story is good but Too much detailed explanation is not a good thing if you overdo it. What distinguishes a good writer from a bad writer is telling more in fewer words, without boring the reader. I think it will look better if you tell the explanations while you are in the action and convey them to the reader piece by piece. At least that's what I think, I don't know if I can explain it.[img=recommend]

I remember now. Now he has the zetsu army. 100 000 free slaves :)

Kekkei tota

Twin lion created by hinata not hyuga

Bastard obito

Yooo

It might be more logical to take over Konoha. If these bastards don't want him, he should take control of them out of spite and take away their property.

Eewww

Otsutsuki tsubasa

You should talk about people dying who want to be Hokage. Nawaki ,dan

Dont kill this guys they are so useful

boring It's been 15 episodes and the story hasn't even started!!! What are you planning? At this rate, even 6352 chapters will not be enough to complete the story.

I would prefer that you give these abilities piecemeal rather than giving them at the beginning. and has already become extremely powerful without needing any other abilities. I think the path you should follow is to find and raise your own team and talented children. I find the one man army mentality of doing everything yourself boring. You can steal Genbu, collect powerful monsters, capture the sky country (flying city) and add powerful clans such as Chinoike, Kaguya, Yuki to your team. For some reason, such stories are not written.

You've broken one of the biggest fanfiction bans. Writing children's characters. If you are going to write a character, you must be at least 14 years old.

Cringy talking style

My friend, how can you claim that you know how to use enough chakra to not harm yourself, even though you are newly born and have no experience with chakra in this world and do not know anything about control? Well, at least use your brain a little bit. Be careful with what you do.

You're bound to screw it up!!! No, he should have learned the chakra when he was minus 3 years old, even in his other life before reincarnation (!)

shisui deserved it