Logikfehler - Profile

Agreed, it's weird to read it twice!

Finally! 🤩 not to say, that Emery's sword art sucked, but... 😅

You already asked her the EXACT SAME question before!!! 🤦‍♂️

Where in this scale are mythical creatures like Twik? 🤔

but luckily only in spirit form... 😅

Well said! There is no evil a-bomb, only evil people using it the wrong way. 🤪

Well, I read the whole story in one go. So naturally it feels completely different to someone who is reading it part for part, day by day or even for you as author writing it. I noticed quite a lot of spelling mistakes (compared to the other web novels I'm reading). Sometimes words are missing in the sentence. Maybe you can use a grammar app to check the chapters before publishing? Maybe you already do, bc sometimes verbs or words are replaced with other words that just don't make any sence in the context of the sentence or story. So maybe you need to double check the corrected grammar? Also, you are repeating stuff the reader already knows from earlier chapters. That's a very bad writing style! It's annoying to read and just drops the overall quality of the story. A big chunk of this style of novel are the system announcements. I'm aware that it's easy to build up the word count per chapter that way, but at some point it feels just too much. At some point you cut down those announcements by replacing it with summaries, that was a good move. I would advise you to put a bit more consideration into the amount and style of these system messages. Afterall, they are a very big part of the fun/joy for us readers. Also, please keep track of the rewards from the book (sometimes you completely forget to mention the result, just a short line: "Nothing special came from the corpse rewards ..." is sometimes better than completely leaving it out.) Another thing is your power leveling. One of the characteristics of this story is the fact, that nobody is stronger than the mc and also, the mc is hiding while weak and is power leveling until he is stronger than the rest. With this approach to writing the story, you are killing a ton of conflicts. Remember, struggle is the salt in the soup of a great story. We want to read about the flaws and struggles of our heroes and how they overcome them. Your character design can be improved quite a bit if you add more flaws, habits, and background. Don't just paint an unbeatable Superman for the good guys, let them be more like e.g. Batman (tragic past, social issues, personal moral code, psychic struggles but also a few perks like money and intelligence to balance the bad traits). I apologize for my harsh words in all the previous comments. I did not mean to hurt you or discourage you from writing. I was just getting more and more frustrated with different parts of the story. I like the world concept, though. It has multiple layers (worlds, haven, hell) and I like the different views and systems of different races (goblin world few, naga few, croco few....). Sadly they are a bit sparse and shallow. Thank you for your hard work and please keep on writing. I know it's not easy, but I know you will improve further with time.

Maybe the headmaster informed him? After all, they had a few days to observe envy.

great... I hope everyone used the recovery time wisely and built a few more defences and recharged... round 2

take a minute of your time and collect the ancient beast corps into your domain. don't just let it lay around as bait for greedy mages and nearby beasts. 😓