Handwran - Profile

Okay reading it again it makes more sense.

Also his whole rage out moment here could be used as a character growth moment if he realized he needs to get better control of his rage since he put his mom in danger

Also thats a great analogy and pretty spot on. If theres a direction that would be cool to see for character growth I think it would be to for sora to start gaining a bit more empathy and have his rage start to ve better under control. I could totally see the natural evolution of his character being that he gains a bit more empathy from being around judy and others who encourage him to be more caring for innocents and such. Also I could see him getting better at controlling his rage which would make him more dangerous

Thats alright abd honestly I was a bit too harsh abd I apoligze for it. Youve really improved a lot from the beginning and while I didnt like that part, the rest is still really good. So dont take what I said too hard, youre genuinely a good writer getting better with each chapter and I look forward to continuing to read your writing ^.^

Ahh ok that makes more sense. Though it does feel like it kinda defeats some of the purpose of an si if they cant use metaknowledge, i do understand it as a writing choice. Oh also im hoping the mc with his genius intellect will create some robot bodyguards for his remaing family. If hes that smart and knows hes in some kind of comic book world, even if he diesnt know about marvel, he should really expect things to go wrong or target his family. Oh also one thing ive never understood about the whole kryptonite bullet is.....superman is far faaaaaar faster than a kryptonite bullet, and with the mcs intellect to process his senses, even if being kept busy with a huge fight, I just cant imagine it making any sense for him to get taken down by something that slow. Now if it was a trap...maybe, but I feel like with his senses and super brain to process them, hed probably be able to sense if something has kryptonite in it, its radioactive afterall. Honestly the only way that would make sense for him getting hurt by krptonite is something at or near his level of speed hitting him with a kryptonite weapon. Like maybe if comicbook quicksilver got a kryptonite dager and was able to hit him with it. But heres the thing, kryptonite while not as fragile as glass is still a crystal, and if the mc used his smarts to make a suite that could protect him from it hed be that much more powerful. Honestly overall I feel like the mc has really underutilized his superintelligence, and because of that his dad died. Moving forward I seriously hope he realizes he needs to take steps to setup protections for his loved ones

Sorry I got a bit harsh in my criticisms here. The whole thing totally caught me offguard. I still think it really needs to be fixed because it doesnt make any sense and just comes out of nowhere with no explanation or logic, but ill probably cintinue on in reading.

Man the more I think about it the more frustrated I get im gonna take a break from this fic and hopefully itll be fixed at some point. I cant read a fic with an mc thats just an garbage personality that I can't root for

Man this fic has gotten soooo good. Im loving it. Also Im so looking forward to the eventual meeting of johnny and sora, gaah itll be so cool. Also I feel like with sora's op superai hacking amd his nanomachines to interface, he could probably curbstomb adam smasher as long as he can survive long enough for his nanomachines to infiltrate adams body and force a connection for sora to hack

Heh, I absolutley love all the joun wick stuff, and really, it totally fits the cyberpunk keanus son esthetic

Man I hope we get to see johnnys shard and our boy interact

Honestly if you didnt show the villian pov snippets this fic would be a lot better, because when you do that you kill any mystery about what my be the cause by luterally spoiling the cause with a villian pov

Im suprised he hasnt picked up johnnys malorian

Lol yeah no sora x gloria, but id totally be down for adding rebecca to the harem

Hey so two things, one, your translation has gotten waaaay better so gratz on that, and two, for tinnitus sounds in english itll be ringing nkt beeping. Like ringing in my ears. Not beeping in my ears. Beeping is a short sound mainly electronic. What pilar would have from a bullet passing by his ear is ringing from tinnitus

Im kinda confused as to whats happening with the ai stuff. In any case the english has vastly improved. You should really fix up the earlier chapters

Just make sure to give it justice, that gun punches holes in military borgs

Haha yes hes getting the malorian