Amv_125 - Profile

By the way, couldn't silver theoretically create a plasmid for all the weaknesses u just mentioned? It might not be easy, and take alot of time and ability, but its possible right? And anti magic plasmid such and such. Cause in all honesty, these plasmids seem to have infinite potential, and i love it. The way you write it does not break the story in any way.

Its not just this fight, but previous fights aswell. Its missing the "comparative" aspect of ur fights, where u used to acutely describe how powerful and destructive an attack truly is. The writing is still top notch, enough so that new readers wont tell the difference. But comparing it with the original, the battle descriptions have changed. And tbh, i would really put emphasis on these small things, since it really puts emphasis on what this novel was about: "Path to Power". The thing with hyogoro wont seem much, but the difference, as a reader, really shines. Just dont take too much attention away from battles, power scaling etc. Since this, in my opinion, is what makes ur novel so great.

Why have ur fights turned less descripive? 1. In the original, u used alot of comparisons to describe how hard someone hitted. "Enough to cleave a mountain in half" etc. Its minimal in the rewrite. 2. Less descriptive interms of environmental damage. You used to use a ton of words that hyped up fights, which made every fight filled with goosebumps. Its the little things that add up. The way you described this fight in the original clearly showed the ginormous strength difference between damien and hyogoro. Yet here, it made them seem alot closer than they should be.

Nah, this was unrealistic. Whitebeard would never go down like that lol

Nothing new lol. We have seen doflamingo make clones out of string. Kizaru make clones out of pure light. And a whole lot more of things even more crazy than these. Especially kizaru, since its almost the same thing as what damien is doing. And i dont understand how creating a dragon out of his fruit powers is something that would fall in the realm of "chaos"? Its the same concept used many timea in one piece. Akainu's fruit not "burning", whitebeards fruit not "breaking" etc etc. In alot of situations. Fights between people of equal level can disregard the fruit powers of the other person to a extent. Hence damiens fruit not "pixelating" etc. Its a simple concept honestly.

How does it break anything we know of devil fruits? There ARE no rules when it comes to devil fruits. Thats what makes them so fun.

Nice backstory, and always love the expressions you define, especially the crazy grins. Keep up the good work.

I meant VA's

1. Again, I have never been surer of the fact that a VA can't contend with someone on the level of smoothie, even if it's for just a little. 2 or 3? Yes, definitely. For a time. But you seem to forget how doflamingo completely smacked smoker around. For a single VA to be able to hold a YC down just straights up destroys the power system. There are tons of VC's, AT LEAST 20-30 (And these are ONLY those who were introduced). For your statement to stand true, it would make the balance between the yonkous and marines a joke. Named VC's are MUCH more capable though, such as tokikake, momsousagi. Even VC's like momonga. These people are the true balance keepers. A random VC isn't doing anything. 2.Read chapter 13: The Devil. It clearly says that his Armament Haki has reached Intermediate Mastery. 3.That was AFTER 6 months of training, not a mere 3 weeks. And "Only" around Hody Jones level? That is a level which luffy, a supernova and part of the worst generation, after 2 years of training under rayleigh, one of the strongest haki users, and also one of the best teachers, struggled to beat (Granted the scenario was in hody's favor). It's not a level someone should be able to just reach willy nilly. I would have had no qualms if she reached that level in the heat of the battle. Heck, I loved the parts about your novel in which you highlighted this important part of one piece. Growth through battle. On the other hand, this HUGE jump in power in just 3 weeks of "plain training" is too huge, without any stakes or such. Couple this with the "rushing" you did in the first 20 chapters, this doesn't give off a good feeling upon reading it. 4.Why do you keep looking at your story in segments such as "2 weeks of training here for Obs haki", "2 years here for armament" etc.?. You just smacked damien onto an island, where he trained for more than 7 years or something alone, something completely and utterly illogical if I might add. You just basically speed ran it. I don't see how this is better than the previous version? There was no sense of attachment, no sense of growth, which I am thinking you were expecting, since u thought you were making the mc get his haki "naturally", and by training. But all I read was you slapping an explanation so you can move on. A rush. I don't look at things objectively and think this is bad or this is good, but try to get a feel of the story. Your first story was amazing. Something that I can say with confidence is the BEST one piece story on webnovel. Some come close, but it still won, at the very least in my opinion. This story on the other hand, is more focused on trying to take away the "bad" parts of the previous story, especially the system, without adjusting anything. You just took the bad parts out and didn't even see how the story was flowing. The strength pacing in the previous novel was fast, yes, but most of it was done in the heat of the battle, which your amazing writing made it MUCH more believable and better. You write one piece battles the best, and the way you wrote those battles made all the strength gain seem natural. This one on the other hand? There is nothing more boring than the initial time skips. Not to mention, the bad parts you just mentioned for your previous story, these were completely swept away by hair-raising moments, especially with xebec. The scene in which damien unlocks his conquerors haki, his speeches, the natural dread etc. so on, ALL of which are missing. Its like you decided to take all the good parts of your novel and remove them. Or move them further, when they were perfect for grabbing attention at the start. Such a long rant man, but it's all because I have been waiting for this novel, for what, 2 years or something (Since you first started uploading)? It was my favorite book, so sorry if I come across as crazy (which I know I do). I know it' not easy as a BSc student to focus on something like this. Thanks man, and I look forward to the future chapters.

I don't understand how a vice admiral can keep up with a mid-tier yonkou commander. Except for garp, and the rest of the "named" VA's, the rest of them are fodder who would most definitely lose against a yonkou commander. And its not even close. We saw what doffy did to smoker, who is one of the stronger ones. Not to mention, i don't know if i am tripping or not, but damien reached intermediate level for armament haki once before in some previous chapters, only for you to once again show it in the fishman chapters and say he JUST reached it, when i am sure he did it in some previous chapter. The fact that you made aurora ALREADY equal to a quasi-YC is just nuts. I don't remember YC's being cabbages on bargain sale. Not to mention, the mc's power progression is somewhat stale and boring in comparison to the previous original version. The problem is not with the system being taken out, but with the way its paced and written in general. With things as it is, no matter how mich i said the system should be toned down in the original version, the original seems much better. Honestly man, except for some parts that are good, i prefer the original to this version any time of the day. That one was a masterpiece not gonna lie. But you worked hard on this, so gg's man, waiting to see more from you. And a piece of advice, if you haven't already written very far into the story, i would REALLY love it if you went back to the way you wrote previously. This version just makes it seem you are unnaturally focused on taking the sytem away and STILL trying to make it almost the same as the original, which tbh is not working. Both depend of 2 different frameworks.

Hmmm, dang, you got me hooked. If it isn't a spoiler, can you tell me the number of such realms?

How many realms are there? Infinite? And is each realm just a planet, or that entire "reality", consisting of its own universe and whatnot. Quite an interesting world.

Confusing af

👍🏻

Come on bro, how much more time?

Whitebeard so strong he has to be nerfed in nearly every fanfic 😂

Good decision. Take as much time as you want. Also, remove the missio ln part, it will boost your novel tremendously.

Really sucks, since this is one of the 2 novels i actively wait for every day. Hope you come back soon and don't lose motivation.

Great fanfic. Imo, better than your previous one, and currently one of the best. Though i agree with one thing a person mentioned in some previous chapter. Shiki. You messed up his character bad. He wants a true "great age of pirates", but he is not so desperate that he would, like a beaten dog, try to grasp at any thrown bone. Matter of fact, it isn't even in his character. He is a conqueror, he would never submit to anyone, he probably dosen't care too much about rocks either. He has the ambition to change the world. A person like that would almost never be broken, let alone like how he broke in his fanfic. It would be much more according to his character that he tries to fulfill his ambition HIMSELF. He would never willingly go under someone. His encounter with roger is a great exmple. Do what you want with the character, but i think the current direction is not right. Especially with him thinking teach as a messiah since he ate the dark dark fruit.

I don't see any way except for garp and sengoku's interference that would stop whitebeard from completely annihilating marineford this time.