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Bran_Ng

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2020-03-18 Joined Singapore

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Posted

Raw?

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Bran_Ng
Posted

This novel is better than most other novels on this site with one major issue, the MC's intelligence, there are many ways the Mc can get powerful quickly but that would not be a good story so the authors makes the MC do dumb things and not think of others. A better way to write cheat novels in my opinion is to give your self points and use those points to create a system, positive aspects cost points depending on how op it is, negative aspects increase points based on how terrible the draw-back is. You can think of writing like a Dungeon Master in a rouge-like tabletop game like DnD, you want to make a compelling story but can't make it too easy for your Players ( MC/readers ), you also can't make the game harder by forcing plot points ( making the MC make dumb decisions ), so you make rules to what and what not the Players ( MCs ) can do via their characters ( cheats/systems ). I realized that this is less of a review and more of writing advice from a reader but Your story can be better author, your idea is original-ish but your execution is lacking as stated by the negative reviews. I am sure you realized this because you rewrote the story and added a limit to the system but you can't make your MC dumb to compensate for the power scaling. An idea for a negative aspect if you ever rewrite this a second time is to make your MC practice to break-through with the system just removing all the repetitive processes ( the MC has to get the idea of how to advance and can do it if given enough time to be able to advance to unlock the ability to advance, so you might as well remove the comprehension points feature ). Do take my advice with a grain of salt as I am not a writer, best of luck.

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Bran_Ng
Posted

Pretty good novel, hope you keep the quality and not fall into a pit trap that is making the mc too op and ruining the power balance.

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