Leo_Micado

1h

Commented

I couldn't see myself, but I had to imagine my complexion resembled that of a corpse at this point. My eyelids weighed heavy, desperately trying to give way to sleep. But I couldn't; every time I closed my eyes, I saw piles and piles of bodies.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

4h

Commented

Alfheim is probably where the elves stay

Like Earth, it was comprised of seven continents: Arcadia, Gelum, The Opes Islands, Primordia, Salmawet, Alfheim, and, finally, the continent we'd been summoned to, Merideam.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

4h

Commented

The opps🤣💀

Like Earth, it was comprised of seven continents: Arcadia, Gelum, The Opes Islands, Primordia, Salmawet, Alfheim, and, finally, the continent we'd been summoned to, Merideam.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

1d

Commented

A sleeper agent

"We've had Aidan Silver under our mind control as an unknowing double agent of ours in the empire for a long time now and today we will finally have an excuse to use him"

Is It Okay For An Antagonist To Save The World?

Fantasy · cier_Tempest

Leo_Micado

2d

Commented

I suggest not committing to the discord idea till you have a more active fan base. It's good to have one so don't totally scrap the idea but unless you have a fan base to run it you'll end up with a dead server

ch 66 A Night in the Woods, Part One.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

3d

Commented

First

ch 65 The Day's End.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

3d

Commented

The spirit tea he soaked in and became bloated

Remarks: You're getting fat

The Innkeeper

Fantasy · lifesketcher

Leo_Micado

5d

Commented

I knew their escape was too easy, no matter how the vamps tried to make it seem I wasn't buying it. Probably an order by Katarina(did I get the name right?) Vlad

"Hey..." Suda spoke in a low tone and tightened her grip on her knife. "Could you tell us how exactly you escaped, again?" Though she'd been smiling, I could feel the animosity and intent to kill brewing underneath.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

5d

Commented

Can the system consume each other to grow?

The feeling in his gut… it was like he had accidentally wandered into the territory of a predator. The signs were around him. But he did not know if he was the target. Moreover, it was not just danger he sensed. It was something… more. Something beyond his understanding that was attracting him. It went beyond the scope of treasure or something valuable. It felt like… a piece of his soul that he didn't know he was missing.

The Innkeeper

Fantasy · lifesketcher

Leo_Micado

5d

Commented

Bro is that markus from The good teacher?!

Answering the magical mathematics question posed by his teacher, Markus had an indifferent voice like that of a dead siren, almost as if it's ringing out from everywhere at once.

Is It Okay For An Antagonist To Save The World?

Fantasy · cier_Tempest

Leo_Micado

5d

Replied to Sir_Killington

Also, I've noticed this but you primarily write the character's conversation in first person. That's good but in cases like this where the point of view is switched from the main character to others, using third person to first introduce/establish the new speaker is necessary before you transition back to first person. Like in the chap, you could have added Agawa's name after a thought or comment she made within the start of her speech. It prefaces the fact that the pov has been switched

Plus, I figured my speed would give me an edge in a fight, even though I had never really fought anyone or anything until that damn bear.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

5d

Replied to Sir_Killington

You could have just made it part of the title for the chap. Then we'll know what to expect when we read it

Plus, I figured my speed would give me an edge in a fight, even though I had never really fought anyone or anything until that damn bear.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

5d

Commented

It's arranged in a pattern that hides what is inside from any angle an onlooker might use

"Random? Lemme tell ya somethin' Agawa." she paused, grabbed me by the shoulders, and exchanged eye contact. Oddly, her usual cheerful tone became serious and firm. "There's one thing you'll learn here: if you wanna stay alive, you hide. Sure, you can have thick walls, but nothin's safer than not bein' noticed in the first place."

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

5d

Commented

Love the use of descriptive language here, really give an image of what it would look like

Over those hours, we all performed our individual tasks. Like us, the Sun was beginning to grow increasingly weary from the day. It sank lower and lower down the horizon, painting the once deep blue sky a blend of reddish-orange.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

5d

Commented

Wasn't he injured toward the end of the fight with the quillbeast? Like a tree branch got shoved in his leg

Plus, I figured my speed would give me an edge in a fight, even though I had never really fought anyone or anything until that damn bear.

Heroes to Hunted

Fantasy · Sir_Killington

Leo_Micado

6d

Commented

He should grow up, this would become more frequent, and will need to learn how to function despite the death of his comrades

For a moment, Kamida only replied with a stare. Getting questioned about a recently departed friend was a difficult thing, after all. Once a few brief moments passed, he managed to will up a response.