Nothing personal to the author but I feel that the quality is going down with every chapter I read. Everything is basically canon storyline with the addition of one character whose existence is basically not necessary barring the forced relationships he's been put in with random girls. There is no consistent setting to the MC too. Randomly friendly and feeling bad and randomly saying he's cold and ruthless and is just using them. The so called master who was very dear to him, the only thing he did was watch him die and complain. But for a random girl who he only wanted relationship with cause she had use, he was feeling sad. This is not a review of the fanfic by any means but my personal statements in their entirety so don't judge it simply based on stuff written here. I just wanted to pass on my message to the author and nothing else.
ch 70 Escaping
Video Games · picaco
Personally feel the story is getting worse. The reason being, MC doesn't feel like he has any existence, atleast when the fic started, MC felt like himself but now he just feels like Aokiji inserted into the story. This is just making it more and more cringe to read. but these are my own thoughts.
ch 201 Chapter 200 Armament Infusion: Rokuogan
Anime & Comics · Navy_King
Thanks for the postive take to the comment. The most I could say is that try to mention what you said in the chapters itself since the reader really can't get any ideas if you don't. My entire response was based on the stuff that is mentioned, I've also thought about the difference in ages and maybe more compassionate because of his sister or his past but as a reader I can't figure it out without it being known to me. And yeah the relationships should have really been kept out as a whole. Maybe you don't feel much because you're thinking and writing as you go on but my advice is to read from the start again from the readers view. You'll simply find that there are suddenly a lot of inconsistencies with what's been said and what's happening. And the sudden relationship happens so fast that's it's more cringe overall, that's considering his mental age too. And you aren't bad by any means, just the fact that you could even try a take with snezhnaya as a start rather than mondstadt atleast puts your idea as more unique. And as for the story itself no one is good at the start, if you still like doing it later you'll keep on getting better at this too. This simply requires a lot of experience to get better at.
ch 70 Escaping
Genshin Impact: Icy Path
Video Games · picaco