Lucien121 - Profile

no it's just the mother one gets me to much man. I see a lot of potential in the story line itself but the adding of the mother was just kinda off putting man. I hope your story does well

just to weird for me I'm not into mommy love it just got to cringe I'm sorry. I couldn't continue. it could've been good but without the mommy thing. this story has no bright future in it I believe .

book not boom

honest review here. so the story moves way to fast that you can't keep up with it at times and have to reread certain parts to understand a little bit of it. we barely have any background. writing quality is ok, the story line could be something if it was fleashed out more. but over all what brings this book to its very knees is its story progressen, how fast paced and how much plot armour it has. it's like James throw a rock in anger and broke a window and killed someone, but the guy was a serial killer and another guy showed up and said it was suicide and everyone believed him, then his mother came to kill him bc she didn't like him ect he killed her puppy. it's like that. the way the story is, it is just to fast paced to much going on with not a spectacular beginning. it could be good. if the setting was more detailed and thought out. if it wasn't so rushed, if they actually made a power scale. there is not one in here. I read this for free btw on my daily reads. I suffered over 50 chapters. it was ok for awhile a bit of a rush in the beginning isn't so bad it kills everything for the future sometimes so I stuck with it. but the way this has progressed was what killed it. all in all its not a bad idea, just poor execution of it. maybe need to flesh out the story more on a story board or note boom come back to it and reboot the book from scratch.