Cole_Cartier - Profile

This story has three main problems for menthat ruin it. The first is the absolute info dumps. It is good that the authir is putting in the work to make everything understanding but it is way too much info. The second is how incredibly slow paced it is. It seems that the author does not want to speed up the story, but he has the protagonist doing expiriments at two years old. Just time skip to when he leaves it would be so much more interesting that a 100 chapter prologue. That last thing is the terrible dialogue. It is so forced and unnatural that it is a but painful to read. Instead of a normal back and forth dialougue between characters they say everything to the person in one sentence and the other party responds in one long sentence. I think if the author just spends less time on backround info fixed the conversations and just put in a couple of timeskips until he reached the age to start his journey this book would be improved