thiago_telao - Profile

I see a lot of potential with going dimension by dimension and many types of technology and seriously, if you want each chapter to concentrate on sex, put onshots and that's it, but add others Characters but that is not exciting, a lot of repetition and only the little story that there is is about sex and the story does not attract

If the chapters are that short, I would advise you to publish 2 instead of 1 a day, it is somewhat tedious but they are very good so I give you 2 stones

Ese título tiene por lo menos 2 grandes mentiras

I don't know if he felt the emotion even in the first and last chapter and the last one, I don't know, I got bored

Más emocionante al final para ponerle emoción pero se sintió aburrido,hasta me dió sueño porfavor toma esta crítica constructiva para , nose ser algo más creativo

More pain yesss

Yes

Jhon

Yes

go to 2 but if you only have to choose 1, I choose the second to go through the omniverse but first to increase your intellect to more

you have a future with this story you can continue like this I like the chapters

ten suerte en tu trabajo y tu vida espero poder leer hasta el final de esta historia,voy a esperar el siguiente capítulo cuídate que tengas buenos días

Wattpad ?

boring but boring sailing ruined there are already many stories with those 2 bad guys, disappointing