Hmm, I like the premise of this story of yours man. It is certainly unique from the other literatures I've read in the internet so far. Specially in this site, because this story hands-down is better than most of the trash beta male stories in this site. Though if you want to hear a bit of my criticism, I would just say that some of the dialogues tends to become confusing when referring to the MC's perspective - always interchanging between 'he' and 'I' for the first world arc. Lastly, besides your still improving grammar which at times can't be discernible at best, that's all I can say. Hope you improve more man, your ideas are fun and entertaining, this story speaks of that.
ch 49 Just relax with me for a while
Anime & Comics · Master_Livythan
The death is too forced and if the parents were a bit more in the picture, or sharing more of their point of view in every chapter, these death would have worked... But sadly it wasn't the case.
ch 36 A Lesson on Cruelty! II
My Idle Gaming System
Games · Adui