what_the_hell123

2yr

Commented

this book needs some strong editing but the story itself is great and shows great promise. good luck author.

ch 40 Newborn Calves Are Not Afraid Of Tigers

Apocalypse: The Fat Lady Strikes Back

General · Bao Baozi

what_the_hell123

2yr

Posted

I think in this apocalyptic world has a lot of potential but the writer to seems to be lacking in words and grammatical skills. also I noticed it's a bit lacking on the descriptive side and the actions are some what exaggerated. ...see what I did there? the writer does a lot of repeats of words too. Author seems to also be lacking in knowledge when it comes to the fighting, school violence and bullying, what students should do and what they should not do, authorities, pain, injuries... housings... editing should be swift and precise asap for the story itself is intriguing.

Apocalypse: The Fat Lady Strikes Back

General · Bao Baozi

what_the_hell123

2yr

Commented

😑

Qiao Lingxiang was fat because of her physique. She secreted too much fat. Whether it was winter or summer, her face was always oily. An oily face didn't look good on a lady.

Apocalypse: The Fat Lady Strikes Back

General · Bao Baozi

what_the_hell123

2yr

Commented

eh?

"This is a rice coupon for 100 kg of rice. Your oldest daughter is mine."

Apocalypse: The Fat Lady Strikes Back

General · Bao Baozi

what_the_hell123

2yr

Commented

boom

This chapter has been deleted.

The Marley Girl

Fantasy · passmemycoffee

what_the_hell123

2yr

Posted

this starts of lonely but I can tell the novelist is going to open up big. I like stories that start slow. good read so far. I'll check out the other books.