ok i like your plot its good you have a great idea there but dont know how to fully show it as I read the quality of the writing is bad but your trying to fix that i see in the first chapter so ill wait to see a the corrected one
hmmm the 2nd chapter doesnt have a quote too maybe you just forgot since your new or maybe you just got an advice to put a quote on conversation the just added it but anyways I like their debate hahaha lol where did you get those lines
uhm thats pretty long you shluold cut the school day for where she was intrducing mr ye plus the dialog quote didn't go until the end but its good your plot is good you just need to improve your qulity writing and im gonna wait for that plus i see that you will have many plot twist already im looking forword for it [img=recommend][img=update]
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Fantasy · SkylarFox
I see that you made another story at a short time but the quality of the writing is bad Im a fellow writer but I know some basic like puting a gupble quotes and stuff
The Queen's flower, you ruined Come's back for revenge
Urban · SkylarFox