- 0 d Continuous Writing
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IAmJustBored
LV 2Just check out my book if you like evil protagonists. Discord: Bored #6316 Alt Webnovel: IAmReallyBored Partner- https://discord.gg/QFkJZyM5-
2021-10-29 Joined GlobalBadges 5
Moments 542
I've already wrote something. btw this is constructive criticism. Ik radiant, he is a mutual friend of mine from a sever. don't dickride somebody you don't know ok? have a good day sir.
After the beast left the scene Ray started laughing inwardly. 'So this is how the outside world is? I thought I was ready for anything, I was overconfident!'
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
Man.. I wanted more. This fic is actually superb, thanks for refreshing read it's actually made me enjoy something on this site after such a long time. The writing, the delivery, the setting... I love it. its not slow paced nor is it too fast but I can see what your doing as a fellow author. Thanks for the read
ch 0 9 [09] Academy Entrance Exam
Naruto: Never Die Twice
Anime & Comics 路 Outlier
I agree.
So, what do you think about the 3rd pov?
Naruto: One Step At A Time
Anime & Comics 路 IAmJustBored
I'm just stacking up the chaps, currently got 7.
I don't think I said anything about his writing style.
Would have been better if you explained this before and not just wrote he learned this in his childhood in a previous chap
'He's good at using a sword, even slightly better than me.' The swords kept clashing back and forth, but Ray was slowly being pushed back. He couldn't cast zap because he had to put all his focus into defending the opponent's sword without getting decapitated. It also didn't help that the opponent had a shield that could suck up any attacks he did. He had to quickly get out of this close range combat or he would be pummeled to death before even being able to show his might as a mage!
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
Once you start writing new chaps remember to put a comma before quotation if you are writing he said or he exclaimed etc .
"Oh, there's one thing I forgot to mention. There's no such thing as surrendering in my arena." The old man said with a wide grin on his face.
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
Nice, best chap so far
yep
He had bean told a couple times that in this world mages were supreme, and they could do whatever they wanted. He didn't realize the extent to this, but judging how Carl saw this as a completely normal thing, it seems to be common for mages to kill normal humans.
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
Will this not help him.
On the first chap your MC said I wish for immortality and use any means possible, then downplay that kind of quote. He doesn't feel like a scientist reborn but a typical kidm
After the beast left the scene Ray started laughing inwardly. 'So this is how the outside world is? I thought I was ready for anything, I was overconfident!'
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
.... I'm getting frustrated with this MC.... and I don't know why. He acts like a typical Mc archetype ik, I was expecting a scientist backgroundish type character
After the beast left the scene Ray started laughing inwardly. 'So this is how the outside world is? I thought I was ready for anything, I was overconfident!'
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
"I guess we should get going," he replied. A comma comes before quotation mark and period comes after.
"I guess we should hurry then." He replied.聽
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
MC has a lot of consistencies with his personality I cant wrap my finger around it.
He had bean told a couple times that in this world mages were supreme, and they could do whatever they wanted. He didn't realize the extent to this, but judging how Carl saw this as a completely normal thing, it seems to be common for mages to kill normal humans.
Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
From the beginning, he was inversed in conflict. As a top researcher in a bunker, who was hidden from other nations, he should have a cautious mentality ingrained. All that means he was in a cutthroat environment so why has he not got the cutthroat mwantality. Dog eat dog world. dog eat dog magical world. It doesn't make a difference. Mc is already well versed in conflict so he should know.
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Seeking Immortality in the Wizard World
Sci-fi 路 Radiant2
Nice... Good to see some chaps stockpiled for me. As always, keep the quality up, it really makes me enjoy the read even more. Its refreshing to see an author who makes MC not train in everything and somehow brings major gains in all areas good stuff 馃憤
ch 12 [12] Moments
Naruto: Never Die Twice
Anime & Comics 路 Outlier