Badges 9
Moments 74
I did get that part, but how do they lock eyes, if she was blindfolded. I think it even happens again later on. That part confused me a bit.
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The Twisted Obsession
Urban · Chichii
Wasn't she blindfolded, though?
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The Twisted Obsession
Urban · Chichii
Wouldn't the simple solution be to enforce the new law: no bloodslaves allowed? Mauve is his wife and she is staying willingly. Just make it the rule that humans can stay as guests, if treated decently, and get Vae out.
ch 519 519. Trivial Matters
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley
Quick question. Why is this man doing the dishes? Didn't he have a really painful injury on his hand? Soaking that in dishwater doesn't sound like the brightest idea.
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The Twisted Obsession
Urban · Chichii
From here on, the it is just the a repetition of the previous text.
Mauve gave Louis one last odd look before she bent her head to look at the words on the page and tried to see if she could actually read it.
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley
Health way through this Paragraph u start to repeat the previous scene in slightly different wording, probably an editing mistake.
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Contract Marriage: The Devil’s Bride
Urban · Chichii
Ah, so Sir Galath is a horse now and his name is Clair. XD Sorry, this had me cracking up. I guess he came over with her horse.
Malcolm led her down the stairs to where Sir Galath was waiting with, who had become her horse. Clair.
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley
A sight for sore eyes discribes something pleasant to look at. Seeing how angry Jael is to see him, I doubt that that is what he meant. Maybe you could find a different wording.
Jael snickered, "Happy to see you? Is this some kind of joke? I would have been happy thirty years ago, twenty years ago, even ten years ago. Now, you're a sight for sore eyes."
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley
I like him already :D
ch 371 371. Vagabond
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley
We just had moonlight falling through the trees now sunlight hitting the lake. What time of day is it? They weren't possibly on that motorcycle the whole night to arrive at the lake in the morning?
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Contract Marriage: The Devil’s Bride
Urban · Chichii
He died. He supposedly committed suicide, after they searched for Ruby at his clinic. I think it might have been the consequences of the bloodpackt with the werewolfs.(the supernatural NDA thing). They accidentally told him an Ruby's parents about werewolfs and than they all died.
ch 481 Tea Set
Conquering His Cold Heart
Fantasy · sanimimosa7
As far as I understand, vampires in this world are born and not created. Which means, turning her is not possible and thus not an option
ch 282 282. An Order
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley
Now I feel bad for being so harsh with my comment. I personally prefer past tense and I enjoyed your writing. I feel that switching between tenses midstory is a bit confusing. There have also been chapters where you seem to be switching back and forth between past and present. Really confusing and a bit distracting. My tip would be to stick to past tense in this story and maybe write a different one in the future in present tense, if you enjoy doing that. That way your readers are not confused by sudden style changes. Of course it is your story and I don't think you have to apologize for your decisions or have to change it for one reader. I hope this was somewhat helpful. Keep up the good work
ch 182 Visit graveyard
The Sweetest Temptation
Urban · Chichii
I dare Jael to call his wife a pet. He will spend the next week sleeping on the couch.
She was tiny and would break if he held her too tightly but she would glare at him as if she would win in a fight. She was also a crybaby and an expensive pet with constant demands but somehow he did not find this annoying.
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley
As far as I can remember Selene is actually their cousin not their sister. They just act like siblings, because they were raised together by the grandfather. So Ethans, Liams and Ronans mom would be her aunt.
Selene nodded her head. "Yes, he is heading the project that Aunt wanted to complete but for some reason, it was put on hold. It's only now it was resumed but met some hurdles. Liam bro went to handle it."
Billionaire's Marriage Of In-Convenience
Urban · tanu_sam
I don´t understand how she can be that forgiving. Ivan had her kidnapped, mocked her together with everyone else when she said she wanted to go home, had her straved, blackmailed her into subission and made fun of her, when her only family died. But now that he and everyone else are nice to her, all is forgiven?! Also their 180° turn in behavior doesn´t make any sense. Shure they might pity her for her loss but they could mock her for her beeing miserable before. Why stop now? Am I just to petty? I want him to regret his initial behavior towards her. He has to suffer befor I can forgive him, but I don´t see that coming with how easy she seems to forgive.
ch 13 WHO ARE YOU
HIS CHOSEN MATE
Fantasy · DA_Aloera
He seems to know all the theorie and the spells. He just can't use them, but he could easily teach them to someone who can (aka Mauve).
"Okay," she said and nodded her head. "I will concentrate on getting better then you will teach me Magic and everything you know about it.
The Vampire King's Possession
Fantasy · GinaStanley