Badges 5
Moments 12
Nice....no mercy!!!
NOOOOO!!!! Truck-kun is a side character now?!
ch 0 2 The Lingering Past
A Transmigrator's Journey To Another World
Fantasy · IvanelaSalove
Ok...First things first. I like stories, I love them, even though a story come's too hard to understand, I still read them. And just as my name suggests, I only speak of the truth, well, My truth if you'd like to call it. First, this novel looks like it has a lot of potential, but, even though this novel is written clearly on Third Person POV, it lacks descriptions.Second, try putting more commas, we don't want the readers to read without knowing when to stop. Picture this, your telling a story, right? When you speak continuously, what do you do? You took a moment to breathe right? That's the same as putting commas.And third. Hopefully you'll read this.I clearly felt like this novel is un-edited, yet, if you can spend 5 minutes reading it you'll clearly see where the mistakes are.Ps. Try reading other people's work. Especially the famous ones in this platform. I suggest reading Shadow Slave. It has a well written Third Person POV that you might like to take notes from. I'm not saying you should copy the story, I'm just stating that you try experimenting from now. Well, here's to hoping the next chapter will be better🖐️✌️. "You cannot write if you don't read." -ParchmentOfTruth-
ch 0 4 A difficult challenge
Unknown Light
Fantasy · Enrich_Chiong
Truck-kun? Is that you?
ch 0 2 The Lingering Past
A Transmigrator's Journey To Another World
Fantasy · IvanelaSalove
Hope my armored-guy survives the fall😱.
Here I am again. Finishing the next chapter. Needs a bit of editing, If you know what I mean?😁
This book has been deleted.
There's a lot of errors, bur overall I'll give this one a thumbs up👍, its not good but its not bad either. There were some parts, well, most parts lack descriptions, I don't know about others, but for me, descriptions about where they are and what they see comes off better than plainly saying 'they are here on the school' or 'they are happy', you get what I mean? 👍😁Still, its only the first chapter, hope that the next one is better than the first.Hope you keep writing more, keep fighting👊.
This book has been deleted.
Baby steps for my guy👊😄. Keep it up!!!
What a twist!!!
"That's why I poisoned you all."
Shadow Slave
Fantasy · Guiltythree