Your narrative is so good, I can clearly see the picture here.
The other is someone who has been watching, testing him, giving him dark thoughts but at the same time pushing him forward telling him not to give up, giving him a direction, a goal. A contradiction that confuses him, but even still this presence that tells him. Go.
Fantasy · BlackSnowAngel
The narrative power is great! The story has a decent pace to enjoy, but not very impactful to hook if using web novel as it is media. It would be better if it being published as a book.
Mind Linker
Fantasy · BlackSnowAngel