CrazyEyedJon - Profile

"Sure you did, you even gave yourselves a team name—Wonder Lawyer and her Fat Sidekick. It took us far longer to come up with a team name!"

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

Andrea strode out of the elevator, forcing Kyle to hurry to keep up with her. "No! I don't! Yelling at each other is what we do, Kyle! It would be weird if I wasn't seen yelling at you!"

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

Kyle continued unpacking. "I figure that we can make plenty of room in the fridge if we throw away some of your leftovers. I'm sure they can't be good anymore." He reached in and grabbed a tub. "Yeah, that's definitely not supposed to look like that," he said distastefully. Kyle closed the tub and ducked back into the fridge. He opened container after container. Some he set back into the fridge, others he threw straight into the trash. "Sorry, Blondie, but I can't have my lawyer getting sick on old food."

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

"Prove me wrong." He spread his palms, ready for her to present her case. He watched her reach for her powered-off phone, and his smile widened when she huffed and set it back on the table. No chance of pulling up a website with individual boards for sale. "Tell me you wouldn't love that. We could even get Burrito a lifevest—and an eyepatch, turn him into a proper little pirate. He could sit on the front of your board and be your figurehead."

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

"Walker is over there talking to Cunningham, and I'm wondering why," he explained.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

"Of course we'll be ok! They do this every year and no one ever dies." said a feminine voice behind Uriel.

Dungeon Raider System

Urban · NanaiSensei

So long as Mom was happy, Burrito was happy.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

Mom and the Servant spent a lot of time cleaning each other's teeth. They did that a lot.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

When Burrito saw the fish in the water, he understood what the plan was! They wanted him to catch dinner for them. He had lined himself up and pounced on the fish, but instead of gracefully flying down to grab it in his jaws, there had been a big splash and he'd just ended up wet and floating.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

And Mom and the Servant had put on weird clothes as well, and then got these big sticks and big boards and floated out together in the middle of this great big puddle!

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

They had gone into another apartment that was a lot smaller than their usual apartment. It didn't smell like any cat owned it, so Burrito immediately decided it belonged to him.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

Burrito had wanted to go and explore, but they had attached him to a string. Not the kind of string that was fun to play with, the kind that attached around his body and never seemed to be quite long enough for where he wanted to go…

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

Burrito had mixed feelings about the magic box. Sometimes when they got out again, something fun had been moved outside the box. Sometimes though, it was the noisy building filled with strange other-Cats and smelly not-Cats, and the non-Moms would pick Burrito up and touch his feet and look at his ears and mouth, and sometimes they would poke him! He always made sure to attack any non-Moms who got too close when he got the chance. They needed to know they were not allowed in the apartment!

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

He'd been in the magic box before. You got inside, there was a lot of noise, then things were moved around outside the box so when you got out again, there was something new there.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

They also started rubbing their faces on each other. Burrito didn't know what that was about. One time they had been sat in front of the flashing light box, rubbing their faces, and Burrito had climbed up on the back of the couch so he could get in real close.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

Burrito didn't know why Mom was so cold all of a sudden. He tried to curl up with her as much as he could, too, to help keep her warm. Sometimes he was allowed to stay. Maybe Mom thought that sometimes both Burrito and the Servant heating her at the same time was too much, and so put Burrito on guard duty instead. That made sense. The Servant didn't have claws and teeth nearly as impressive as Burrito did.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

…He was Mom's new servant!

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

Burrito knew that he wasn't supposed to eat the good smelling stuff from off the tables and counters, so he only ever did it when Mom wasn't looking. She had different smelling food she put down on the ground for him to eat. Which was good. Tasty.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook

And then things had changed, when The Interloper had come.

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Urban · slowestcook