In relation to this being the author's first story, its quite good. There is a fundamental understanding of world building and character development seen within the story and alot of effort has been put into the story. My review is being done on the basis of reading the first 2 chapters and the introduction of chapter 3. Personally, I believe that the first chapter doesn't do well in establishing the story, to me it doesn't transition well from the first to second chapter (ch) and rather than labelling it as the first ch it would be more beneficial to have it be labelled as a prologue as it would convey to the readers that the ch is more of a separate introductory, independant from the beginning of the story as by labelling it as the first ch it may confuse the audience when going from 1st to 2nd. In addition it may be better to actually have the 2nd ch be the 1st ch instead. Another problem I had was the change from 1st to 3rd person writing, it feels unnatural to switch from a character perspective to a outside perspective, although it does make sense for ch 1 and 2, the change from 3rd to 1st person writing from the 2nd to 3rd ch feels out of place. Despite my critiques, I still think that this story does have some potential and while it may not be a hit, it is still quite the good story for a first time author and im excited to see what comes next.
Fantasy · zowji
Pornographic Content Hate or bullying Release of personal info Violence Spam Other
Webnovel 
In relation to this being the author's first story, its quite good. There is a fundamental understanding of world building and character development seen within the story and alot of effort has been put into the story. My review is being done on the basis of reading the first 2 chapters and the introduction of chapter 3. Personally, I believe that the first chapter doesn't do well in establishing the story, to me it doesn't transition well from the first to second chapter (ch) and rather than labelling it as the first ch it would be more beneficial to have it be labelled as a prologue as it would convey to the readers that the ch is more of a separate introductory, independant from the beginning of the story as by labelling it as the first ch it may confuse the audience when going from 1st to 2nd. In addition it may be better to actually have the 2nd ch be the 1st ch instead. Another problem I had was the change from 1st to 3rd person writing, it feels unnatural to switch from a character perspective to a outside perspective, although it does make sense for ch 1 and 2, the change from 3rd to 1st person writing from the 2nd to 3rd ch feels out of place. Despite my critiques, I still think that this story does have some potential and while it may not be a hit, it is still quite the good story for a first time author and im excited to see what comes next.
North Of Lies
Fantasy · zowji