Black_H34rt - Profile

The chapters all still free… Made a mistake there, my bad!

When i say the relationship is being forced, i mean the way the two of them are relating to each other considering the fact they are siblings(albeit step siblings) just doesn’t work the way you’re putting it. You might argue this is a fantasy genre but I’ll tell you fantasy or not, it doesn’t require throwing away common sense afterall who would read a novel with no common sense or a jumbled and messed up common sense only someone with a jumbled brain would… The novel’s okay(save for the mysteries, i hate ‘em) My previous review was about me not wanting to read a story about a sister whose brain only revolves about ”teasing” her brother and a story about the brother living in the past despite having your mother trying to make you happy at the expense of her own happiness. Now, this is all about me(I didn’t even finish reading the free chapters). But I can see from your review improvement seems to have been made regarding the plot line and all so i‘mma go back, read again and give it the review it deserves without bias(Not now though, kinda busy in the real world, that’s the reason it took me a while to reply) So you’re welcome

This is disappointing… The story feels like you are just writing what comes to mind and trying to force relationship especially between Kalie and his sister…. It’s a jumbled mess at least to “Pentagram school”, that’s where i stopped and did I mention Cringe? It’s so cringe What kind of relationship are you trying to make out between kalie and his “Family”? I don’t know man, might seem biased but I’m not into Cringe

The Story is great and very interesting but what ruins it for me(More of a personal preference) is how dialogues are held and how you portray the MC thinking. I don’t know how to describe the way the MC thinks and exclaims at every single thing he comes across but it feels unreal especially when he was taken against his will as a test subject and in the middle of enemy territory with a ticking bomb in him no less(mind parasite) It just makes no sense seeing him act as he is doing but as i said before it’s more of a personal criticism, the novel is quite enjoyable Just not something i can make do with, the dialogues and thought process of Mc makes me feel like someone just decided to mess with the novel in a way something that can be easily described takes forever and a lot of sophistication that is just not needed No one thinks like their brain’s got a dictionary

Out of mind, out of sight🤓 This is messed up