Quas1 - Profile

Love the fan fic keep up the great work. A quick question: will the story progress to high school basketball or will it move on to another world before that?

First of all i love the fanfic and i think it’s great. Although the grammar is good but what irks me is you keep writing “mom and bob” you should write their names or ”mom and dad” It feels like his only parent is his mother. Keep up the great work

Thanks for the chapter But can you write the jutsu’s name in english i dont know as a reader what certain jutsus are

You can just start doing it bit by bit until you get it right

Honestly you should do it even if you mess up just do it after looking it up and thinking about it it would make the story mory realistic

You can also just make him have a good voice you dont have to make him a professional singer just make his streaming his career and dont have him create platforms and businesses this just ruins the story when the mc has multiple careers. Again this is just my opinion take it or leave it

This story seems to have good potential and for a first time author you’re good but you still need to give attention to the details for example there are no details in the timeskips, no mention of his parents since their appearance in CH 1, also concerning his family’s financial situation they should probably be the same or close to the dunphys since they live next door to them otherwise they’d live next to jay if they were rich. Also you’re rushing his singing/streaming journey he’s still too young you should ease the readers into it mention him playing video games with phil and luke sometimes or singing with one of his parents or something. Even though he has a part of lucifer’s soul it just explains his talent to learn fast in specific areas not everything should be instantaneous(sorry i know i mentioned this without knowing what you’re planning but alot of fanfics do the instant success thing and it annoys me because usually later on their mc’s work gets repetitive). This is just my own opinion take it or leave it it’s your choice i’m really excited to see what will you write in the future chapters. Ps. his nickname “nat” just makes me think it’s a girl named natalie (idk how to spell it) name him nathan if you want. Keep up the good work author. And also please dont drop this there is a serious lack of modern family fanfics

Or you can just use them as a side story. Pagan gods would be interesting for meeting gabriel.

Great chapter and a great fan-fic keep up the good work. Regarding the poll. I dont know your plans for the story (will mc stick with sam and dean or have his own journey) but if he sticks with sam and dean then go with demons since you can use it as a meeting point for them at some point. If he has his own journey then you can go with any monster (other than vamps) since not alot have been shown about them and you can just write your own progenitor (children of lilith) of those monsters. You can use vamps for the occasional meet up of mc with sam and dean since basically it’s already shown about them (besides their alphas death was sooo anti-climactic in the show). At the end of the day it’s your fanfic and you can just do what you think is good. This is just my opinion. Again keep up the good work.