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I was wondering why the emphasis is on ‘immortal.’ And by immortal, do you mean a guy who literally cannot die, or someone who is just ageless? Because those two are completely different. And if we’re speaking about ageless, we have a lot of characters in Wednesday with that ability, like the vampire and some different traits of monsters. But if you’re speaking about immortality, no race has that ability, where the protagonist in the story cannot be killed ever. That’s what I want to understand.

I usually don’t judge a novel until I’ve read at least 80–90 chapters, because I like giving stories a fair chance. But with this one? Honestly, mate, I’m impressed I survived that long. Calling it messy would be a compliment — it’s a full structural collapse. Let’s get this straight: If you remove the bad writing, the broken logic, and the chaotic character behavior… there’s nothing actually holding the story together. And again — nothing against the translator. The translation isn’t the problem. The source material is. Plot Logic? Never Heard of It. The protagonist starts off fine. Smart kid, hardworking, decent setup. Then he enters Hogwarts and instantly becomes a brainless system puppet. The system says jump, he jumps. The system says do something stupid or self-harming, and he just nods like a loyal NPC. No agency, no thought, no consistency. It’s painful to watch. Canon Changes With Zero Logic Behind Them The author rewrites major plot points but gives absolutely no explanation for any of it. Example: Peter Pettigrew somehow becomes the Secret Keeper for the Longbottoms. Why? How? What relationship do they even have? In canon, Pettigrew was James Potter’s best friend — that’s why he got the job. Here, it feels like the author picked a random name out of a hat and moved on. Snape’s Behavior Makes No Sense Either Snape targets the MC like he personally killed Lily. But there’s no reason for such hatred. In canon, Snape’s behavior toward Harry has emotional history behind it — bitterness, guilt, grief. Even bullying Neville would’ve made sense, since he’s the “main character” of this altered timeline. But this? This is fake drama created by an author who doesn’t know how to build real tension. And here’s the real plot bomb: Why is Snape even a teacher in this world? The ONLY reason Snape turned good in canon is because Voldemort killed Lily. If she died by the hands of other Death Eaters in this timeline, Snape would’ve gone full revenge mode and then gone right back to the dark side. He wouldn’t redeem himself. He wouldn’t volunteer at Hogwarts. He wouldn’t even be free. Logically? He should be in Azkaban with the rest of the Death Eaters. But logic is optional in this novel, apparently. The Scene That Made Me Drop the Book Potions class. Three houses in one classroom: Ravenclaw, Gryffindor, Slytherin — all packed together just so Malfoy can snicker and Snape can bully the protagonist. Mate, if you’re going to break canon that badly, at least add Hufflepuff too and complete the circus. Potions ALWAYS pairs two houses. This is basic Hogwarts structure. The author broke the entire schedule system just to force a drama scene that makes no sense. The System Is the Final Nail in the Coffin The mission system is so poorly designed it kills the story. The MC doesn’t make choices; the system makes them for him. It turns him into an emotionless robot instead of a character. Remove the mission spam, make progression natural, fix even half the logic gaps, and the story might be salvageable. As it stands? It’s a mess — a canon-breaking, character-destroying, logic-ignoring mess. The One Saving Grace Despite everything, there is one thing the author does well: creativity in world expansion. The new creatures, original magical species, and entirely new ecosystems added beyond the established Harry Potter world are genuinely interesting. They show imagination — real, vibrant creativity that could’ve been the backbone of a great story.

Oh, alright then — I didn’t realise your intention was to make the magic part of the science, mate. My suggestion about the Hermit Pathway was only because the world already has magic, and the two don’t step on each other’s toes. Both pathways are solid picks, and they’re actually my favourites. I haven’t started reading your novel yet, to be honest. I’m still focused on another Warhammer 40K novel, and I want to finish that first. But when I saw your synopsis, I got curious, since the madness mechanism comes from the Great Oldest One. That’s why I threw that explanation in — just giving you a heads-up. It looks like you’ve already covered this somewhere in the story, which is probably why you sounded a bit on the aggressive side in your comments. Either way, I’ll start reading yours once I’m done with the one I’m on now, and sorry if I came off as offensive in any way.

Honestly mate, I think the Hermit Pathway fits the Witcher world better, though Paragon works too if you go above the Sequence to Demon of Knowledge. A lot of people wrote about Lord of Mystery without really understanding how madness works. Madness comes from the Great Oldest One — it’s a side effect of His fragmented essence leaking contradictions into the world and into Beyonder powers. So how do you resist it? Worship can grant divinity, which helps stabilize your mind, but the real anchors are your humanity, will, and personal identity. Since you’re using this Pathway or Beyonder ability in a completely different universe, you won’t experience the madness or divinity tied to the Great Oldest One. Following the Sequence there is purely about the path of power, because both divinity and madness in LoTM originate from Him.

A very enjoyable novel. First of all, the world-building is honestly amazing. I’m not sure if this is a translation or if the original author is here, but either way — beautiful job. Not only in the world-building, but also in the character design. The only gripe I have with the story is the actual background of the protagonist. It seems like some sort of mystery waiting for later chapters. I will say this now: if you expect a fast-paced story, you will not find it here. This one is a slow one, but a good slow one. There is no extra fluff just for the sake of it. Everything serves character building, world building, establishing the story, and grounding the protagonist’s actions. It really makes you feel that he is a transmigrated person who was an adult in his previous life. He is smart and wise, which most other novels that pretend their protagonist is an adult fail to execute correctly. You can see in his actions the wisdom of someone who lived a whole life, someone who understands you cannot judge a book by its cover. I also like the idea that the protagonist didn’t create some unbelievable goal like other novels. Even though his proficiency system is granted, he still has to do real work to get his rewards, not half-hearted effort. His steady development matches the ambition of the protagonist. I don’t want him to suddenly change the Wizarding world for no good reason. I want him to change it through his own talent and knowledge, in a meaningful way — not by forcing some industrial revolution, because the Wizarding world simply doesn’t work under that kind of framework. Personally, what I’d really like to see is a sort of steampunk society mixed with magic. It’s not a requirement, just my own wish, but I think it would fit beautifully in this kind of setting. There is no stupid comedy or overly sarcastic protagonist — and thank God for that. And I don’t mean someone who just has humour; I mean those protagonists where the author treats the world like a joke, like a garbage dump where anything can happen just because “he can,” ignoring all rules. In this novel, I see a lot of potential, and I truly respect the author and the translator (if there is one) for the good work. I really enjoy the story. It's peaceful. Yes, it's slow — but for a good reason. Every improvement in his talent feels tremendously rewarding, instead of the fast-food pace of other novels. It also somewhat resembles the original Harry Potter vibe — more about the journey. I just hope he develops a good amount of ambition in the future. Right now, he’s focused on his studies, and that’s fine with me. Thank you for the good novel.

Right, mate, let’s clear a few things up first. I wasn’t going after the author personally. I wasn’t calling him names or slagging him off. I was critiquing his writing choices and how he handled the Warhammer universe — and I’ve got every right to do that, same as you’ve got the right to defend it. First off, about the translator: Yeah, I get it, it’s a translation. The translator isn’t running the show. I’m not even talking about them. I’m talking about the original author, the one making the creative decisions. Now, honestly, if someone decides to write fanfiction in a universe as massive and gnarly as Warhammer, they should at least have a clue about it. I’m not saying they need to memorise every single codex, but if you aren’t invested or don’t understand the lore, it’s obvious — and that’s when a story starts feeling thin and shallow. I’d honestly rather read fewer stories that actually make sense than loads of half-baked ones. And that’s not me slagging the author, that’s just my take on quality. About the whole “research is too hard” line — nah, mate, not buying it. If you’re writing in Warhammer, research is part of the gig. And today? It’s hardly rocket science. Lore summaries, databases, AI fact-checkers — you can get up to speed in minutes. It’s not difficulty holding people back, it’s effort. If someone’s not willing to put in the graft, maybe they shouldn’t be playing in that sandbox at all. And the money side of things — listen: fanfiction is someone else’s IP. The worlds, the characters — none of it’s yours. Donations? Gifts. Not wages. Saying “it’s not worth $20” doesn’t fly, because fanfiction has always been about passion first, money second. If profit’s the goal, original work makes way more sense than mooching off another universe. On the piracy point — look, fanfiction sits in a grey zone, right? You’re already using someone else’s world without owning it. So getting morally offended about translations or reposts is a bit rich. And financially? Most readers experience the world through fanfiction without buying the source, so yeah… can’t really claim moral high ground there, mate. Now, your point about “no suspense” — that’s where we’re talking past each other. I never said he should get one ridiculously overpowered tech per planet. That’d be daft. I meant escalation. So here’s how I see it: Early on, he gets something small, like an STC for a healing gun — easy world, easy tech. Then, medium-level world, threats get serious but not hopeless, so maybe he gets an aircraft STC or a combat mech. Later, extreme or desperate worlds, he could earn a capital ship — or an entire branch of advanced tech. And by a “whole branch of technology,” I don’t just mean a big shiny toy. I mean all the bits that make a capital ship tick: ship armor, warp or quantum engines, guidance systems, hangars, reactor cores — the lot. Put ‘em together, you’ve got a full capital ship. Separately? Each part is a full technological field in itself, which allows for side stories of research and development instead of just instantly getting the tech. That’s not static. That’s dynamic. Rewards scale with difficulty, risk, and achievement. Keeps tension alive instead of flattening everything out. Now, here’s the kicker — and honestly, this is my biggest problem with this fanfiction. The author isn’t just cherry-picking tech from other universes. He’s summoning people from those universes too, and these people start worshipping him like a god. That’s just… not Warhammer, mate. Not only that, the author even gives these people some sort of immunity against the Four Chaos Gods, which totally turns the story into a generic space fantasy instead of the grimdark, high-stakes Warhammer universe we all know. That completely ruined it for me. So no, I’m not “daydreaming,” mate. I’m critiquing the structure, logic, and respect for the original universe — the stuff that actually matters in a progression story.

Honestly mate, I don’t really understand why you chose Harry Potter as your protagonist. It’s incredibly hard to keep his personality consistent with the original, and using him limits what you can do. I personally think it would be better to create a new character from scratch. That’s just my opinion, so don’t take it too personally. I’ll admit I also have some bias here. Harry Potter’s story is already complete, so I don’t see a reason to bring him back. We all know who he is as a character, and people already either love him or hate him. If you change his personality too much, it might make me dislike his original version, or it might make me dislike your version if it doesn’t feel right. And if you create such a strong version that I like him more than the original, then I end up disliking the source story instead. Either way, I lose — and that’s where my bias comes from.