The first notes sounded and then some people nodded as they enjoy the melody..
The sound of guitar from the performance was soothing. Today, a red hair musician performed singing a slow song in the cafe.
The scent of coffee and drinks fills the café and orders are being taken and served. The conversation seems to flow and life seems to be abundant.
But in one corner of the café, there is a man with an expression like he had nothing else in the world.
"Are you okay, Daniel?" Michael asked Daniel looking worried.
Tonight he brought Daniel to this café that he always frequented in the past. It served to show to Daniel that people are living…and living well.
To show him what he has forgotten and to bring him out of his room.
Somehow "there" Daniel had another breakdown. This time it is terrible than before.
The doctor says Daniel need to face what has happened. Michael heard what the Doctor said.
Michael asked the doctor what he should do to help his friend. The Doctor said he need to try to face it head on.
Slowly…but he must face it or he will never be able to release himself from that world inside his mind
And that world inside his mind is dangerous. Because in that world, she is there. And in this world she is not.
And Michael fear, he would like that world more, the world in his head, the world where she exist instead the world he is now living.
Thinking that if Daniel can go to the café he could be cured was naïve and stupid. Michael thought to himself but he did not blame himself for holding this hope.
Every time Daniel has a breakdown it is almost like a panic attack and he felt breathless.
He is attacked by this feeling of suffocation. Like he is drowning slowly drifting into the bottom.
He sweated profusely, his heartbeats quickened and he always felt like he's going to faint.
Michael doesn't like seeing his friend like that. Precisely because he knows what trigger that breakdown.
Daniel look at his friend and then he sighed
"I'm okay" said Daniel weakly. He was smiling but it was a smile of a person giving up
Michael shakes his head and there is a trace of anger and anxiousness
"No, you're not. You're the farthest from okay' he said stressing the statement. Then he sighed before he added
'It's my fault" Daniel shakes his head and then with a bitter smile on his face he hold his friend shoulder and squeeze it and said
"No, it's not. It never was" Daniel said more firmly this time. Daniel would not let Michael blames himself.
This sin is his fault and his fault alone. He should have been there that day. If only he was there….could he stop it?
And if he stops it would he be happier? In his mind, she is there. Waiting. For some reason the world in his mind is more tempting
"Tell me Daniel, are you really alright?"
Daniel looks like he was contemplating on answering. Then he looked straight at Michael and he said
"I'm doing just fine." Before he smirk weakly
'That's what I always tell the doctor anyway' Michael frowned. Then taking a deep breath Daniel confess
'I would always lie and say she's not in my mind. That she is not there any longer" Daniel said this sincerely.
Then he tries to calm down again.
"But then when we go out to this café and sit at "our" table, looking at the scratches me and her made below the chairs, I realized. And that realization always forced me to go rock bottom. Each time I'm forced to face the truth."
Michael could only shakes his head
"What truth? "Michael asked curios of Daniel answer.
Daniel smiles a bitter smile.
"I'm not over her. I'm not over her, Mike. And I don't think I can. I know I shouldn't anymore because it is ruining me. But I just can't help it" tears are streaming down from Daniel eyes.
He was sobbing as the song drowns out his sobs.
Michael was looking like he doesn't know what to say.
Daniel was hurt. No…he is still hurting. He is ...…hurt because he loved too much. When Daniel was dating Amy, Michael was always jealous of them.
The way they looked at each other, the way they finished each other sentence and the way they always know what the other was thinking.
He was jealous and happy at the same time of their passion for each other.
Their love for each other.
They were happy and all was good. Daniel once said to him, that Amy is like a fire to him. It lights him up, make him soar.
Makes him believe anything is possible. She was his fire. She was his light.
But what happens when that fire is no more? You will leave a shell. Like a candle. They burn bright. But the brighter it was, the shorter it became.
Before it is completely extinguished
"No, you can forget her. You'll get over it" said Michael in a soft tone.
He wanted to console his friend but he doesn't know how.
Then Daniel said
"You know there is a quote I read once in a book. It goes like this. "You'll get over it…" It's the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life forever. You don't get over it because 'it" is the person you loved.'
His voice cracked and he continues as the image of that woman in pain appears inside his mind again
The question he should have asked…the words he should have said….if only he did it right…..would that tragedy happens?
If only…..he was more..
If only he was….
But he continue saying
'The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never closes. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not made disappear by death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of her and no-one else can fit it. Why would I want them to?"
Then he added
'And why should I want them to? This pain…is my pain alone. At least, this, I should bear' he added
Daniel said while wiping his tears. Michael just sighed and then shaking his head he then he grab Daniel shoulder and he looked Daniel right in his eyes, staring, pleading with his eyes.
But Daniel eyes are dazed. In his eyes, maybe he wanted to go where she was. But he couldn't let that happen.
He won't give his best friend to her
In his heart he seems to be praying
'Please…please, don't give up'
Then he shakes Daniel shoulder and said
"Look at me, Daniel. LOOK AT ME!' He shouted and it startled Daniel, that he broke out form his dazed expression.
'No…you are wrong. You can't love her like this. You have to stop loving her like this. Stop…loving a dead girl!" For Daniel sake, Michael really hoped he will get over her as he grab Daniel shoulders crying with him together.
After what happens, Michael knows Daniel wanted to drown in his sorrows.
But Michael will not let what happened to that girl happens to his friend. It is selfish of him…but Daniel is alive…and she is not.
So…he will do whatever he can…this time. He will not repeat the mistake that both of them make.
"Earth to Daniel. Earth to Daniel" Daniel was startled and then he finally realized Michael is calling him
"What are you thinking about?" Michael asked.
"Old stuff "Daniel said nonchalantly
"You were just about to tell me about this girl you met that looks like Amy. Now, get on with the stories." Michael insisted
"You're excited aren't you?' Daniel chuckles a bit.
'Ok. Ok. I'll tell you the story. "
So I continued the story about this girl I met in Brave World that looks almost like Amy. I really need his advice.
And another night passes until I'm over you.
First chapter for today. There will be a few more chapter coming your way in a moment. If you like the story please vote for the story and leave some reviews.
Hope you enjoy the chapter. Next chapter would resume Daniel life as Aero
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