Journey: The World of Witches

LV 11

FlowLifeGaming

The story has an interesting view on witchcraft/magic. I think with some proper story arcs and a few good editors... you’d be set. Don’t stop writing this story it does have the potential to be a really good novel. 👍

LV 10

mrmrcia

I really appreciate how descriptive your writing style is. Although it may not be everyone's cup of tea, I prefer something that ignites my imagination with concrete descriptions. However, incorporating a lot of expositions slows down the plot, and some readers may not be into this kind of laggard pacing. Also, as someone who has a similar writing style, it's very difficult to think of metaphors to use in the descriptions, since adjectives don't really suffice. The intricacy of the prose is one thing that I'm trying to find. I think you can achieve this soon! LMAO, the friggin altercation with Melissa and Erize was a delight to read because of their insults. Although, when writing an actions scene, make sure that the passages would convey how quick the action was. Furthermore, also point out what's happening with their gazes, muscles, limbs, auras, and everything. Refrain from using modifiers. The world building is phenomenal! I wonder how the education system of Mire's Military College works in particular. I'm pretty keen on reading how the three methods of spell casting works: runes, incantations, and magic circles. However, incantations are considered spoken spells, so should it be a major category? I think it would fit as an element more rather than a category. I adore that you're willing to explain the system that you built. But perhaps, you can put up an auxiliary chapter that will elaborate on the spell system and the world. They're important information, yet the way you narrated them in the story was quite in a condensed paragraph. Readers usually skip over thick passages. In relation to that, I advise that you cut your paragraphs. It's really not optimal to read such long narration, since people tend to skip over it. There were some minor mistakes such as misuse/missing punctuation marks, leading to run-ons, and some questionable word choices. I just pointed them out to let you know that this work could look even more beautiful. For the characters, I adore Melissa the most. Maybe it's for the reason that her nasty tongue is untouchable. Cecil and Erize is just always having a hard time from her insults. I should ship Andrew with Melissa. I surmised Andrew to be quite the straightforward person, a tad selfish to some degree, but caring nonetheless. Hmm, I'm still wondering why the court was able to accuse Melissa of being the Cerulean witch without properly investigating the matter. Such corruption, ugh. Lucifia and Melissa should really spare from bullying my dear Basil. Aside from that, nothing really stood up for me in terms of the propensities of the other characters except for unique parlance of some people and the aggressive onee-sans. Overall, that pacing of the story is just right, not too hasty nor slow, by virtue of the minimal transitions that were effectively placed. Rest assured that you're a good writer! And this was an interesting read for me, and will continue to do so. I'll be supporting you! (Please don't hurt me for not being able to provide a good enough review) p.s. don't use too much foreign characters that are not a part of the english keyboard. The bots might identify you as someone who steals other people's works, blacklisting your novel.

LV 3

Ike801

So, I find myself writing a review! It's been a while since the last one, so let's make this one count! With that, let's start this review baby! Okay, so if you look at my rating, I gave it 4.8 stars only because of the writing quality, which is basically just some run on sentences and some odd word choices at times. Honestly, just having some commas here and there would fix this story right up. Now to the things I like. The characters are funny, smug, and often straightforward, all while having their own thoughts and feelings that are intricate, yet easily understandable. The characters are just great, really. The plot moves forward pretty quickly, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, I'm just used to things moving at a slower pace. A lot happened in the 16 (not including Chapter 0) chapters I read, but it flows really well despite that. It also helps it's pretty easy to read as well. The world is intriguing, especially after I read the chapter 0. I'm very curious on the other 6 energy, especially since you mentioned there was atomic energy that people could use as well, which makes me wonder how technologically advanced this civilization is. They have rifles, so it can't be too far off. I dunno know if I really did a good job with this review, but I say read it yourself. It is good, and the character interactions are amazing, better than what I've read for the most part. Now, why are you still here? Go read this book already!

LV 14

coyote187

If I was reincarnated into a book I want it to be this one. The world building is truly amazing the characters are to die for and the overall enjoyment you get from the book is wonderful.

LV 11

madskie00017

This story is promising. For those who are Fantasy-Adventure fanatics, this story is for you! I enjoyed reading the chapters so far. The character development and visualization of the story is pretty good. Keep it up Author-nim!!!

LV 13

Rob_Byus

Love the book,the story is great and the characters are great too especially lu in all I can't stop reading this book and can't wait for what happens in the future for this novel.

LV 11

MoeJam90

Story-telling at its finest! Fluid and relatable characters with great emphasis on their interactions. I love how the world, culture and beliefs unravel in your very eyes.

LV 11

DaoistQCcy5e

Nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice

LV 10

Skull_

👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

LV 7

Hender

nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice

LV 4

Shadow_Magus

I like this novel. No game system I see. Good flow and good world background. Keep up the good work and don't drop it. I have seen too many authors dropping good novels like this one! ATB

LV 3

jordiMaverick_bW

No harem tag is usually a good indicator for an interesting story. The simplistic magic that doesn't rely on a game system to work and painfully thick waifus are just part of the reasons why you should read this book. I had no problem with the flow and there and there were some words used in ways I've never seen before. A few spelling mistakes but these are just minor errors which will not take away from the experience . . . . . . I did not give 5 stars because I am being petty. Please read this book

I tried to read this and this is good! I never thought the synopsis would make me read further. If it's witch that we're talking about then I'm in!

LV 3

bibiyenini

The world of witches that the author wants to convey is great! Check this novel out, it will give you the fantasy you want! Highly recommended for everyone who wants more thrill on fantasy books!♥️