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TheBigSister
LV 3An aspiring author. Writing might lead to my own enlightenment. I very much welcome constructive criticisms, they help everyone improve.
2018-07-31 Joined GlobalBadges 4
An aspiring author. Writing might lead to my own enlightenment. I very much welcome constructive criticisms, they help everyone improve.
2018-07-31 Joined Global
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Dialogue really is a tab robotic, they all sound the same. The changes in PoV is also jarring, which doesn’t help how the tone of each character is basically the same. Also, your MC is too trusting and seems so naive for an adult.
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