Webnovel Author: EchoHellion - Novel Collection

Overall, the chapter could use some spacing and grammar fixes. Dialogue should be on new lines. There's also some irregular breaks due to some misuses of the comma. What I like though is how descriptive this chapter is and the way it introduces the characters, what they're like and the MC's motives. In summary, it's a good start.

This chapter has been deleted.

Mage of Ultimate Creation

Fantasy · TheValidSource