Freya519 - Profile

Freya519

Freya519

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2019-11-10 Joined Global

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Freya519
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Commented

Excalibur: the last phantasm Enkidu: the chains of heaven and the black barrel. if I'm not wrong

A holy sword forged from the inner sea of the world. Chains forming a spear that awoke the breath of the stars. A barrel that measured life and inflicted death.

Danmachi: Reborn with EMIYA's Powers

Danmachi: Reborn with EMIYA's Powers

Anime & Comics · Feniurme

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Commented

+1

(both -->) jk, don't you dare vote for this ;))

Hollywood King

Hollywood King

Movies · TC_Liyanage1

Freya519
Commented

+1

Yes, Lilian must be Ian's daughter -->

Hollywood King

Hollywood King

Movies · TC_Liyanage1

Freya519
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Freya519
Commented

Mera and Karen please

Freya519
Replied to Freya519

one last thing. when jaune goes to another world, please don't have the other worlds freeze in time. if the time passes when he comes back new developments might occur at this way would be interesting. so yeah... no time freezing upon dimension traveling

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Freya519
Commented

in many other fics jaunes parents are stricter on him than on his sisters. if you want you can use this angle to build resentment between him and his parents after they refuse to train him. focus more on the wider world of remnant and not on the main cast in beacon add some world building. a character like your jaune has no need to go to beacon, he can save people on his own by just traveling.no need to train other's and give them powers and pls remove that time dilation thing. it removed all the stakes in the story. no need to make him ridiculously powerful and give him all manners of abilities. powers take time to train so you might want to give him a certain type of powers and stick with them. in this fic you gave him the bleeding edge iron man suit. but I dont think he even used it before combining it with the destroyer. if your gatch gives him something, try to have him you it. good luck on the rewrite I will read it when it comes out.

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