Webnovel Author: JuniorJumble - Novel Collection

JuniorJumble

JuniorJumble

LV 4

My pfp is from the manhwa “The Second Coming of Gluttony” I recommend it if you like fantasy and rpg genres.

2021-02-23 Joined United States

Badges 6

Moments 52

JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
Posted

The Author is an expert at Word Smithing. They beautifully craft a grand combonation of words that paint an extrodinary picture fitting of the mood. Writing Quality is an obvious 10/10 because of that. I do have trouble understanding parts of the plot (more specifically the prologue), however, this is probably due to the state of mind I am in while reading this (terrible ADHD). The Updating Stability is also great so far but there are only 7 chapters right now (Prologue - 2.2) so it's hard to tell. Even so, 10/10. It's unfair of me to grade Story Development, Character Design, or World Background as of right now but, so far, the novel barely lacks anything. I would even say that Webnovel doesn't deserve such high quality but I'm glad I get to witness something like this from the start. I probably should have waited on writing this review, but I wanted to help the Author by giving them a bit of motivation and confidence. There's only so few people that have actually seen this novel compared to other works so I didn't want them losing hope when they've only just begun. That being said, there is need for a bit of feedback. - Theres a bit of spoilers going forward in this review. - For one, the relationships of the characters move a little fast and we don't have time to simmer in the emotional tension of the character interactions. Like the love triangle between the MC, her cousin, and her guardian. Her cousin likes the guardian but we don't know the cousin as a character. Therefore, we don't feel anything for her despair. You could only feel for a person you don't know through relating experiences or pity. It feels like the Author is so lost in the characters that they forget to explain them to us. We don't really get to understand who is who. The cousin kind of just appears out of no where and steals the spotlight. It just felt like something important was skipped. We don't know the character at all but the Author knows everything about them. (This gets resolved later in Chapter 2.2 where the character is developed a bit for us to understand but it feels a little late.) An author gets to spend an astronomical amount of time with their character in comparison to a reader, so it is understandable that something like this can happen. The Author just didn't realize that we needed a bit more time to relate to the characters, to build an understanding, and to become attached to them. - Most of this next part is not really criticism for the Author but just me explaining how I view character development. - (I don’t even know what I’m saying for this part but just let me cook for a moment.) Actions and reactions are key to developing a reader's understanding of a character. Characters will agree with one action and disagree with another. Everyone has a different personality that influences these reactions. The Author must embody those personalities while writing that character. It's not much different from having a personality disorder. "If you want to have engaging dialogue, incorporate unique personalities and relationships they have into their tone and use of words." It's just like that for having engaging characters. Every thought and feeling they have should be following their actions, working together to paint a beautiful array of emotional relation. It gets pretty complicated here though. Every character also has a mask (unless otherwise written). Insecurities aren't the only thing that paint this mask, however. The relationships of the people around them, who they relate too, their beliefs, conformity. There's a whole lot that could paint a character. That said, you have to wait for the right time to reveal what's under the mask. Slowly hint at it, foreshadowing a character's hidden feelings. When it is revealed, it would be an alluring display, threatening to touch the emotions of the reader. - And heres some feedback. - Sulli should have received this kind of attention is what I believe. In Chapter 2.2, most of the stuff I mentioned is masterfully incorporated but wrongfully placed. If it was earlier in the story I believe the readers would relate more to Sulli. Chapter 2.1 kind of ruined the moment for me. It was like breaking a dam but barely any water was inside. Chapter 2.2 just poured more water into the already broken dam. I also don't really understand how Mina's misunderstanding sprouted. It feel’s like the events of 2.1 would prosper better if they happened after 2.2. Then the analogy would be reversed and it would make sense. Pour water into the dam and then break it. Creating a flood of emotional power. Art is subjective so I won't tell you what 'should' be done, instead, I am giving feedback that you can either receive and ignore or take to heart for future development. Either way, I want to see you and this story grow as a faithful reader. I'm terrible at explaining things so I'm not the best at constructive criticism but I hope this helps to some degree. I might update my review if anything major happens but, for now, I will just sit back and enjoy this new favorite novel of mine.

JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
Commented

No more needs to be said.

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At first, he intended to give his opponent a good punch, but who knew that his punch landed on soft cotton instead.

My Passive Skills are Invincible!

My Passive Skills are Invincible!

Sci-fi · Ultimate Guaiguaipi

JuniorJumble
Commented

Every person who read this:

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I wonder how many stats will I have if I eat the guild master's arm? Well, that's crazy and I'm sounding like a hungry monster which contradicts my handsome appearance.

The Goblin's Leveling System!

The Goblin's Leveling System!

Fantasy · ShadowKatake

JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
Commented

By rewriting i mean literally deleting the current story in volume 2 and re doing it.

JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
JuniorJumble
Replied to JuniorJumble

Sorry if the way I explain things makes it sound complex.

JuniorJumble
Commented

One would still grow the same speed if they were on either Maumar or Earth though. If you spend three years on maumar its equal to 6 years on your body and mind.

JuniorJumble
Commented

2s on Earth = 1s on Maumar

JuniorJumble
Replied to grize

ty

JuniorJumble
Commented

Supposed to be 16980 my bad i wrote this when i was tired.

JuniorJumble
Replied to ChaYeonWoo_

Lol

“Where did you run away to? Why does your hair and beard look messy why didn’t you save? Do you know how worried we were when we couldn’t find you? Couldn’t you have told us about where you were going to?” shouted Yi Man-young.

The Hunter That Returned From Hell

The Hunter That Returned From Hell

Urban · Rish_madara

JuniorJumble
Replied to Reader_lalala45334

A kitchen isnt the same as a dining room

As Adam doesn't plan to live in this place anyway, and just practice most of the time, he created the area that only has 3 rooms on it. The first room is the kitchen, which is simple and only of 8 m³ volume.

I Got An SSS-Grade Unique Skill 'Extreme Luck' As My Starter Skill!

I Got An SSS-Grade Unique Skill 'Extreme Luck' As My Starter Skill!

Fantasy · Khier

JuniorJumble
Commented

Does he always have a backpack on him?

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While staring at the incoming horde of monsters, Link took out something from his backpack space without any hesitation—it was a crystal clear crystal ball!

Doomsday Online: Supreme Blessing

Doomsday Online: Supreme Blessing

Urban · Jixia Academy's Half-Step Gentleman

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