Webnovel Author: MangetsuTH - Fanfic Collection

The problem with first-person points of view is that while the character narrates or if there is a general explanation involving the character's state, ability, mentality, etc. his or her will always seem out of place because this is something that takes place in a third-person narration. So having the character cohesively narrate something he shouldn't seem strange and out of place.

Bad move, me and probably nobody cares about this dude or will, and future fights with him Ahhrr... I'm here for the mc descovering his world not death chances that are not real or an ancient poor dude that can fuc7 himself for all i care. Don't get me wrong, your story is good, i'm just complaining.

Come on, upload a new chapter bro, 17 days!!

Same.

Author, how do you intend to make sure your main character doesn't die immediately when he arrives in the Gene Universe? Han Sen had the cat with nine lives tattoo for this, do you intend to make him steal Han Sen's pendant? And why isn't Jinag Chen trying to get closer to Han Sen? If he is Han Sen's friend, he would naturally take him to the Gene Universe at some point and support him however he can, what is your plan? Antagonize the protagonist at all times and steal everything he owns just because?

I'm talking about the 1, 2 and 3 before the rewriting and this one.

Bro delete these useless chapters you wrote and leave The ones with real contet.

You should delete this chapter

Well, the way the sentences connect and communicate with each other in your writing is hmm... clumsy? Would that be the right word? I can get the general meaning and where the text is going, but it takes some effort. Example: He is going to buy a shirt, but it would be red, not green because it stains. That's how I feel reading your writing, I understand, but there's a lack of information, such as where he went, what store, what type of shirt, price, size, among others.

Did you use AI to write this? Só confusing...

Synchronized!!

Cute.

I can't stand his name, Smarus sounds like a sneeze to me, like: "Ah~ ah~ ah~ SSMMAAARUUUSSS!!!!" Smarus Drangonborne, yes, of course~, his last name is Dragonborne for sure... Sneeze Dragonborn- No! Dragon Sneeze!! Yes, that's his name!!

Bro, I understand what you were trying to do here, but with the re-entry and the impact of the fall all of his organs should be ten times bullet proof at the very least, add that to Doomsday's constant evolution and adaptation along with absorption of light and darkness and you have a monster on your hands, not at superman level of course but a nerfed superboy is quite possible. Remember Author, a super body comes with everything and I mean EVERYTHING super, and that includes strength, endurance, stamina, speed, reflexes, speed of thought (improved brain), healing factor, improved senses, among others. Something that many fail to do when introducing a character who can stop a car at 300 km/h with one hand is take into account how good his speed and reflexes are, super strength = super speed = super senses/reflexes, take something away from that equation and your answer will be wrong, someone with super strength doesn't just punch with super strength, but also with super speed and if that someone is not adapted/synchronized with that speed then there is something wrong there, Superman has super speed because he has a super body, everything about it is SUPER, not just the strength. Now tell me dear Author, how strong, fast and resilient would someone who has adapted to re-entry into a planet's atmosphere and a collision at terminal velocity be? Giving someone Doomsday's powers and not being faithful to those abilities is the same as wanting criticism like the one I'm writing from your readers.

I still don't understand why he didn't add human DNA to the mix, I know it wouldn't be the strongest, but as he wants to be as human as possible this DNA would at least provide a solid basis for the form he so desires.

Bro, I understand the anger against the Batarians, but killing children... That's too much, no matter who they are, they have a cultural problem and without changing the culture or restricting them harshly there is no way to change them, maybe that make them worse, but still bro, that was a bit too brutal, all races deserve to live, even the Batarians, as much as I don't like them. You don't need to save them from the meteor in ME2, but at least don't drive them to extinction, that's very cruel, close to being extinct is okay, as they will be forced to change their slave culture to survive or the other races in the galaxy would destroy them.