I'm Scarlett Jane, the 27 year old author of The Girl Who Loved Two Princes.
2022-04-14 Joined South Africa
I'm sorry I don't find this plausible. What about the detectives that were assigned the case? Were they bribed too? You would have had to stage a crime scene. Show injuries. The black blood would be a red herring for any detective. Respectfully I think I will stop here. I wish you luck in the future
ch 0 8 Arrested
Urban · Hassy_101
Okay.. So many things... First off, the doctor who would have done the autopsy would have been a government worker since this was a homicide and there definitely would have been an autopsy. Your GP can only sign a death certificate if you died of natural causes or in a hospital. Secondly, didn't they say there was a body? So he wasn't cremated and you could still do an autopsy now to determine cause of death. Testimony alone from an eye witness in this case is not thorough. It's sloppy and it's not how things are done. Finally, most people don't have a funeral so quickly. How long after he died is this? That's just the obvious things to me. The plot doesn't hold water.
ch 0 8 Arrested
Urban · Hassy_101
I come bearing new issues...the reason she has to get married is flimsy. Her grandfather is alive and can at this point easily fix the will so that she has more time to find a husband. Unless what you meant was she is inheriting her belated mother's property or whatever through this marriage. If so, this is unclear. I also don't get why the groom agrees. If he wants someone for his child, he can get a nanny. It's not a good enough reason to marry if he's wealthy himself and has no interest in her inheritance. Just saying. Doesn't add up
ch 0 4 The scheme to get her inheritance
Urban · Hassy_101
No no, I'm very straight forward. I say what I like and what not. Sometimes people get upset so I just stop there, because it's not my intent to upset anyone. I don't think you did a bad job. Just needs some tweaks. I wouldn't have commented at all if I wasn't interested. If you don't mind, I'll keep going then😅
ch 0 1 The last minute groom change
Urban · Hassy_101
Apologies if you found that harsh. Maybe I will just pass. Sorry I wasn't able to review. Wishing you much success 💕
ch 0 1 The last minute groom change
Urban · Hassy_101
Your synopsis is super confusing. You have random people talking that don't really give up any necessary information in the first chapter instead of introducing your main characters well and I was just thinking easy on the exclamation marks. Nevertheless, I've yet to read a contract marriage book... So I will give it a shot. Onward
ch 0 1 The last minute groom change
Urban · Hassy_101
Thanks so much for the kind words
This is the kind of book you can lazily flip through on a sunday afternoon. It's not going to change your life, but it will serve for a fun pass time. Writer shows great potential and promise, but I would have liked a little more attention to detail. That's my only critique. Really it's a lovely, light read. Haven't quite finished yet, but I plan to. Ten chapters in. All the best to the writer
just another roomie MOVED
Urban · vesnxx