Webnovel Author: idiofyialogy - Novel Collection

idiofyialogy

male LV 2

links . . . - f (shorturl.at/GNT17)

2022-09-26 Joined Philippines

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idiofyialogy
idiofyialogy
Replied to Yi_Lai_Ke_Si

BRUH, REALY LUO XIAOYI? THE YI LAI KE SI OF HEAVEN & EARTH

ch 0 1 Trust me and don't read this. It's a garbage Chapter which I'll delete soon. (10)

Tea Sipping Young Master

Tea Sipping Young Master

Fantasy · Dao_Ancestor_

idiofyialogy
Posted

Three chapters in and thank you for giving me the opportunity to review your novel. Please keep in mind that this review is purely my personal opinion and is meant to be constructive criticism to help you improve your writing. First, the concept of your novel is interesting and unique. The idea of a character being transmigrated into another world and discovering their powers and abilities is something that many readers enjoy. However, the execution of this concept in the three chapters that I read was somewhat lacking. One of the main issues I noticed was the pacing of the story. The first chapter started off with a lot of action and tension, but then slowed down significantly in the second and third chapters. This made it difficult for me to stay engaged and invested in the story. It would be helpful to maintain a consistent level of tension and excitement throughout the novel to keep readers interested. Another issue I noticed was the lack of world-building. While the Oversoul System and the concept of soul ranks and purity are interesting, there is very little information given about the world that Lucas has been transmigrated to. This makes it difficult for the reader to fully immerse themselves in the story and understand the context in which the events are taking place. It would be helpful to give more information about the world and its rules, cultures, and history to help the reader understand and become invested in the story. Lastly, the characters in your novel felt somewhat flat and one-dimensional. While Lucas has a clear motivation and goal, the other characters that he interacts with do not have much depth or development. It would be helpful to give these characters more depth and complexity to make them more relatable and interesting to the reader. Overall, while the concept of your novel is interesting, the execution in the three chapters that I read could use some improvement. I recommend focusing on pacing, world-building, and character development to enhance the reader's experience and keep them engaged in the story. I hope this review was helpful and I wish you the best of luck in your writing endeavors.

idiofyialogy
idiofyialogy
idiofyialogy
idiofyialogy
Posted

The story follows Julian, a mysterious and devilishly handsome young man, as he ventures into the world of "New Dawn Online," a fully immersive virtual reality MMO game. Equipped with monstrous combat experience, sharp senses, and overwhelming charisma, Julian quickly becomes a powerhouse within the game. One of the things that I really enjoyed about this novel was the unique setting of a virtual reality MMO game. It adds an interesting twist to the traditional fantasy setting and allows for the exploration of interesting concepts such as the immersion of the players in the game and the consequences of their actions in the virtual world. The story also touches on themes of power, survival, and the idea of becoming a "monster" in order to succeed, which adds depth and complexity to the plot. The writing style of the novel is engaging and immersive, and the descriptions of the scenery and events in the story are vivid and descriptive. The character of Julian is also well-developed and multifaceted, and his motivations and actions drive the plot forward. Overall, I highly recommend this novel to anyone who enjoys fantasy stories with immersive settings and complex characters. The story is action-packed and full of excitement, and it will definitely keep readers on the edge of their seats. That being said, there are a few areas where the story could be improved. One suggestion I have is to further develop the world-building of "New Dawn Online." While the descriptions of the game's setting and features are intriguing, there could be more exploration of the rules and mechanics of the game and how it differs from the real world. Additionally, expanding on the backstories and motivations of the other characters in the story, particularly Julian's trusted subordinates, could add more depth and complexity to the plot. Overall, this is a compelling and exciting novel that is sure to satisfy readers looking for a thrilling fantasy adventure. I highly recommend giving it a read, and I look forward to seeing how the story develops in the future.

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