"Don't stress out yourself to things you can't control. :)" Want to support my work? Yes, you can through my Patreon https://www.patreon.com/TheFilthyRhymer
2023-04-18 Joined Global
Oh, that explains the confusing use of pronouns. May I suggest kindly that just use their original pronouns? Especially since it was their POV. Deep inside, they still claim themselves as the original right. I'm not familiar with gender swap troupe so I could be wrong. Good luck!
ch 0 2 Chapter 2 - The Hidden World
Urban · marvel_away
Suggestion: "Her" closest friend, betrayed "her"
But that was before Mei Ling, his closest friend and confidante, had betrayed him in the most profound way possible. Her heart pounded with a mixture of anger and betrayal that matched the city's pulsating energy.
Urban · marvel_away
She's a she right? Suggestion: A vibrant young "woman".
From her vantage point, she could see the sprawling streets, the futuristic architecture, and the people who went about their lives, oblivious to the turmoil raging within her. She had once been one of them—a vibrant young man with dreams of success, love, and happiness.
Urban · marvel_away
To warm the climate is to not mix hot and cold but solely hot. Suggestion: "As if the devil was playing with hellfire to warm the climate."
The atmosphere was heated, as if an angel were mixing cold and hot water to warm the climate. He approached her: "Is silence the best answer?" She forced a smile. "Yes, I did."
Teen · AbdulfatahFatima
What's a test-free breakfast? I tried googling it but nothing came. Is it just simply free breakfast?
Mrs. Leila's and Mr. Adeel's eyes met, and a burning sensation ensued as they both looked at each other with regret. "Are you ready for a test-free breakfast?" he asked with a strange laugh.
Teen · AbdulfatahFatima
Great description, was able to imagine the scene very easily!
Yi Heng's journey began in the shimmering city of Eternaland, where towering spires reached for the virtual sky, and the hum of magic resonated through the streets. In Eternaland's bustling plaza, players from all walks of life mingled, each with their own aspirations and dreams.
Games · DirtyXiaoLongBao
Are we practicing the dao of word count here? The previous sentences in the first chapter were repeated here. No biggie tho xD
Within the game, Yi Heng transformed into a Level 1 character, his class still a mystery—his potential, untapped. For in this realm, he was not just another player but "The Key" chosen by the game's enigmatic creators.
Games · DirtyXiaoLongBao
That was quite flawless :O
ch 0 1 Introduction:
Games · DirtyXiaoLongBao
"of those" has been used twice.
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Sci-fi · 1cutecat
"until it disappointed back." Was it an error? My suggestions: until it disappeared back or until it dispersed back
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Fantasy · AnimeTagz
The book's currently paused and needs a lot of reworking. So you guys might expect some unedited chapters from here on.
ch 0 1 Chapter 1 - Vivid Dreams, Crestel's Schemes
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Eastern · TheFilthyRhymer