Webnovel Author: Toni_Yunanto - Novel Collection

I would suggest you consider breaking up the text into smaller paragraphs for easier reading. Additionally, you may want to consider adding more descriptive language to help paint a clearer picture for the reader. For example, you could describe the appearance of the stars, the colors of the civilizations, and the emotions of the characters. Here is a possible rewrite of the passage with these suggestions: In the myths of many ever expanding universes, the boundless void becomes the vast sky. Only the stars call the silent universe, warmth we all live beneath. They twinkle like diamonds in the endless night, each one a beacon of hope and wonder. Hope and darkness we all call the planets civilization. Amidst this unexplained emptiness, different colors to all civilizations, despite their despairing frame. Some are bright and vibrant, others are dull and faded. Each one reflects the mood and culture of its inhabitants.

I think you have a nice idea for a story, but there are some areas that you could improve on. Here are some suggestions: The first sentence is a bit vague. What does “preserved Aria lounge” mean? Is it a place that belongs to Aria or is it named after her? You could clarify this by adding more details or using a different word. For example, you could say “Aria and Theo find themselves by the fireplace in their cozy lounge, filled with books and intriguing artifacts that Aria had collected over the years.” or “Aria and Theo find themselves by the fireplace in the Aria Lounge, a quaint and charming place that was named after Aria’s grandmother.” The second sentence is a bit confusing. How does Aria recall a quiet old house by the creaking of the floorboards? Is she remembering a specific house or a general impression? You could make this clearer by using more descriptive words or adding some punctuation. For example, you could say “As they sit together, Aria recalls a quiet old house that she used to visit as a child, where the wooden floorboards would creak in a soothing rhythm.” or “As they sit together, Aria recalls how the creaking of the wooden floorboards reminded her of a quiet old house.” The third sentence is incomplete. It ends with “Of course, this is not new to them” but it does not explain what is not new to them. Is it the creaking of the floorboards, the fireplace, or the lounge? You could complete this sentence by adding more information or connecting it to the previous sentences. For example, you could say “Of course, this is not new to them, as they have spent many nights like this before.” or “They were used to the creaking of the floorboards, as they had been coming to this lounge for years.”

The novel synopsis for “Dragon’s Flight: The Key to Ancients” is intriguing, but it could be improved by adding more clarity and specificity. The synopsis does not introduce the main characters or their goals, which makes it hard to connect with them or care about their journey. The synopsis also does not explain what the ancient scroll is, why it is important, or how it relates to the legendary dragon. The synopsis could be more engaging by providing some details about the world of Eldoria, the challenges and dangers that the characters face, and the stakes of their quest. A possible improved synopsis could be something like this: Eldoria is a land of magic and mystery, where dragons soar in the skies and ancient secrets lie hidden in the depths. Lila, a young scholar, has always dreamed of finding the legendary dragon that is said to be the guardian of Eldoria. When she stumbles upon an ancient scroll in a forgotten library, she discovers that it holds the key to unlocking the dragon’s power. But she is not the only one who wants the scroll. A ruthless warlord, who seeks to conquer Eldoria with his army of dark creatures, is also after it. Lila must team up with Kian, a brave warrior, and Zara, a cunning thief, to embark on a perilous journey across Eldoria. Along the way, they will face deadly enemies, hidden traps, and unexpected allies. Will they be able to reach the dragon before it is too late? Find out in “Dragon’s Flight: The Key to Ancients”, a thrilling fantasy adventure full of dragons, magic, and danger.

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