- 0 d Continuous Writing
- 1.5 h of Reading
- 19 Read books
P_LOVER
male LV 2The plover has no fear, for it flies into the jaws of the beast and feeds on the same thing it consumes.
2024-02-05 Joined GlobalBadges 3
Moments 36
If you read even just a little bit later, you'll know the full extent of his powers. Besides, physical prowess is not the true measurement of power, especially for a god that is not of this material realm.
"Blessed mortal, is this everything you have ever wished for? The glorious destiny of killing the greatest evil in the land of Amoreas?"
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
I thought my paragraphs were adequately short enough, it must be a formatting issue. I write with my laptop so most of the time I dont know what they look like on mobile format. I'll try to divide them into shorter ones
ch 12 Scum of the Outlands
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
It's only really a shocking revelation to the king and queen because the readers already know Duke Vanus is dead, and that's also not the point of this particular scene. The point is that, as will be shown later on, the people of Erosith are very open about their feelings and values honesty about those feelings more than class/etiquette.
"Uncle.... It was father."
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
This isn't really meant to demonstrate how the nobility works but more of how the world around Pavor works now that he's the 'Champion of Amore'/ the hero of the story. Everything goes well for heroes and they can do no wrong in the eyes of the people. It's like an outer force or deus ex machina is fixing everything to make it all work out, even in a very 'forced' manner. It's related to one of the plot threads of the story so it's not really something I could change
Pavor couldn't help but wear an ironic expression. These humans will seriously twist his words into something 'kind' and 'wonderful' just because of his status, won't they?
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
It was implied when the concept of Phobodemons were first introduced
Davien furrowed his brows, still remaining calm despite this development. "I think it's best that we get out of here along with Duke Vanus."
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
So violent to a child, wow
And don't talk to me like that if you don't want me to destroy your arms and legs, stupid piece of trash !
The Village Of The Immortal Sinners.
Fantasy · Nitchiren
The word 'chapter' is still in French, you might want to edit that
Chapter 1 : Welcome first Pawn
The Village Of The Immortal Sinners.
Fantasy · Nitchiren
Baileif is the name of the town, hence why it said 'the town square of Baileif'
Pavor spotted Tudo and Lynx once more, too busy fighting the small slime larvae that had reached the town square of Baileif to notice the goliath of a monster approaching them.
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
It's the same castle as the one he woke up in. The appearance of monsters/Phobodemons are a common occurance and easily manifest at the presence of extreme fear. They just materialize as soon as someone is so full of dread
Davien furrowed his brows, still remaining calm despite this development. "I think it's best that we get out of here along with Duke Vanus."
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
Besides some grammatical errors and typos, the prose is fairly well-written. The writing style is very florid and the way things were worded seems well thought-out. It's just that I'm new to this kind of formatting. It's very much like a movie/play script, so it took a moment for me to adjust. Usually the descriptions are not the ones in quotation marks and it's the dialogue that uses quotations. But it's fine, I managed to understand who was talking and what was happening after getting used to it. It's just that this—along with the sudden introduction of characters without really letting them sink in for a moment— made it hard for me to digest what's going on in the second half of the chapter. And it's a really long first chapter compared to most books in this platform. Still, I find the plot interesting and the monologue about the history of this world. I like the themes it seems to be tackling so far.
ch 0 1 Prologue
The Village Of The Immortal Sinners.
Fantasy · Nitchiren
Yep, the whole nature vs nurture argument. They may be identical in nature to the original but they ultimately live different lives anyway
They may be clones, but experience and environment determine the clone's behavior and personality, also time generally has effect.
The Village Of The Immortal Sinners.
Fantasy · Nitchiren
Exactly
So what are we, talking sperm in this case?
The Village Of The Immortal Sinners.
Fantasy · Nitchiren
But it isn't really the factors of origin that makes a human. Humanity is more than just a biological concept: it's also a philosophical concept because to have humanity is to exercise things like free will and capability for thought and critical analysis
"I created you yesterday, you're growing like your original, but basically you were just contained in a test tube, so why should I consider you human?"
The Village Of The Immortal Sinners.
Fantasy · Nitchiren
I really agree with this sentiment. So mamy in our current population are too lazy to even think for themselves, so they just hop into bandwagon mentality to be part of the masses
Honestly, I prefer to think they were just lazy.
The Village Of The Immortal Sinners.
Fantasy · Nitchiren
Why not? Fossils are cool
"Why have you chosen this paleontology instead of business?!" his father screamed at him at the top of his lungs.
Otherworldly Closet
Fantasy · SenorSleep
The plot thickens
So, this is the kid Mr. Brooks wants to protect, eh. Austin thinks.
A Bodyguard's Guard
Realistic · Ramens_theBestXD
"DIE, DIE, DIE!!!!!" She yelled at the slime larvae as she slashed their sebaceous bodies with her claws.
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
Pavor: These mortals should learn social distancing!
Pavor looked utterly disgusted, and resisted the urge to roundhouse kick this priest. Why do mortals always have to touch him!???
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER
For side characters, maybe. But for the MC, Pavor hates the concept of love and his focus is on solving the mysteries of this new life as the 'hero', the system and the world itself.
Fate Reversal System: Villain God Reborn As Hero Mage
Fantasy · P_LOVER